Middle Name-WWYD

kac0807 · October 2011

So I'm having a bit of a Middle Name dilema too. DH's Dad passed away suddenly and very unexpectedly 4 months after we got married, so we had always said if we ever had a boy we would use FIL's first name (Lawrence) as baby boy's middle name to honor him. I was always fine with this until after we had T. I decided to keep my maiden name and add my married name to it (without a hyphen, just a space) because it was just my sister and I in my family with no boys to carry on my Dad's name and I felt strongly about doing that to honor my Dad and my family. I wanted T to have the same last name I did, but DH was dead set that he did not want our children to have a double last name, so I gave in on this and she only has DH's last name. So with the thought of us possibly having a boy this time I asked DH how he would feel about using my Dad's first name (Charles) as the baby's middle name, because the baby will have DH's last name that he will carry for life honoring DH's family & Dad in that way. It's a very touchyemotional subject for DH and he doesn't see that as honoring his Dad so usually the conversation gets dropped without having a solution. What do you think? Am I being unreasonable asking this? What would you do?

prncsstp · October 2011

1. What about using Lawrence or Charles as LOs first name, then you can use the other as a middle name? Lawrence Charles and Charles Lawrence both sound good together.

2. What about a double middle name? This way you honor both dads....

octoberbridesrule · October 2011

prncsstp:

2. What about a double middle name? This way you honor both dads....

That's what I was going to suggest.

kac0807 · October 2011

prncsstp:

1. What about using Lawrence or Charles as LOs first name, then you can use the other as a middle name? Lawrence Charles and Charles Lawrence both sound good together.

2. What about a double middle name? This way you honor both dads....

1. I suggested doing this to him to...using Charles as the baby's first name and Lawrence as the middle and he wasn't a fan.

2. I also thought about doing this....do you guys think that would be weird to have a double middle name?

dle927 · October 2011

Like I said, I LOVE Charles for a first name! If DH isn't agreeable to Charles would using your dad's middle name in some form or fashion work?

You could also use a double middle name too.

I'm actually a terrible person to ask about this because DH and I had the same conversation (several times) and I am the one who compromised with a middle name I didn't necessarily want to use and no mention of my dad (or my brother) in Evan's name. Truthfully, I'm cool with it now and glad Evan has the name he does even if "my" family didn't get a specific portion of E's name. (And hey, who can argue with the initials "EZE"?)

ArcticFox · October 2011

That's tough. It would be tough to honor your dad over your DH's dad. I lost my mom 6 weeks after I got married, and I kept my maiden name, so it is tough for me to lose my family name. We didn't use her entire name, but a piece of it in the middle name. I don't have much of a suggestion but I can say I would lean towards honoring a family member that has been lost.

mrsoc · October 2011

Wow...that is really tough. We did not use any family names for middle names, it was easier that way not to have to pick....all I can say is good luck!

MelissaSue81 · October 2011

i think you should do the double middle name

battybtags · October 2011

kac0807:
prncsstp:

1. What about using Lawrence or Charles as LOs first name, then you can use the other as a middle name? Lawrence Charles and Charles Lawrence both sound good together.

2. What about a double middle name? This way you honor both dads....

1. I suggested doing this to him to...using Charles as the baby's first name and Lawrence as the middle and he wasn't a fan.

2. I also thought about doing this....do you guys think that would be weird to have a double middle name?

Both my DH and SIL have double middle names-DH's is after his uncle I think-both his first and last name are DH's middle names

Irisheyes1247 · October 2011

I don't think it is weird to do a double middle name, that would be my vote. Then all your bases are covered and you still get the first name you had talked about. My cousin gave her son a double middle name and while it is kind of a mouthful, it sounds nice - Harrison Sidney Charles (lastname)

babyconverse · October 2011

I don't personally feel just by your baby having his dad's last name is quite the same as honoring him by naming your baby's middle name as his first name.

My BIL passed away unexpectedly 4 months after our wedding as well. And we both feel very strongly that if we have a boy his middle name will be BIL's name. It's our way of honoring him and having a piece of BIL be part of our baby if it's a boy.

I think the double middle name might be a good compromise if you are both unwilling to give in.

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