DD started year in K and school now wants to advance her to 1st grade
I'm in dire need of advice, words of wisdom or whatever you have to offer.
A little background: My daughter's birthday is October 2 and we live in MA. The age cut-off to begin K is 5 by september 1. Prior to the last school year, her pre-K teacher said dd was ready to go to K and reccommended that we enroll her in the private accredited Kindergarten program they offered which did not adhere to an age cut-off. We did so knowing she would likely have to repeat once she got to public school since the cut-off for public First grade is 6 by september 1--we simply thought it would give her a leg up to be a bit ahead of her peers, particularly if she was ready.Last winter however the district altered their age policy to allow parents to advance their children to first grade provided they had successfully completed a full-year of K, had teacher recs and could show academic proficiency. This was likely in response to new families coming in from towns/states which have a later cut-off. Her teacher said dd was one of the smartest in the class, picked up the material quickly and strongly pushed for advancement. Come springtime, we agreed and went through the necessary steps.
The district administered language/math assessments and observed her for one hour in the classroom. Although she scored very high for her age, they were on the fence and chose to air on the side of caution since it was the first time they were doing it and said no. Her teacher was vehemently opposed to it and we tried to appeal the decision but the best we got was "we want to observe her in our own classroom for a bit and then maybe advance her at some point during the year."
Well here we are almost 2 months into school. They have redone the same assessments, come to the conclusion that academically she is an above average first grader and, after speaking with her current K teacher, she can and should move to first grade. But they are leaving the final decision to my husband and I.
After all we went through last spring, the discussions, the appeals etc I'm happy and pissed at the same time. She is settled in her class, knows the processes, etc. Although she has made some comments in the last few weeks that lead me to believe she may beginning to feel boredom, she has also made some good friends and is quite comfortable already. I'm also struggling with how to approach it with her or with the other moms of kids she plays with--some of whom are good friends. She's quite adaptable, is very well-adjusted and I think we are leaning heavily to advancing her but i'm just nervous about what happens next.
Thoughts?
Re: DD started year in K and school now wants to advance her to 1st grade
(Everything I am saying below is based on my OWN child, and I don't believe myself an expert on anyone else's child so what they do is their own business)
Ok, I'm saying this coming from the perspective that rather than my kids "having a leg up"...that I want them to be slightly challenged and actually LEARN and work for things a bit vs be bored with school...so both my girls went to school the year they were supposed to, I did not red shirt, even though their birthday's are close to the cut off, and we live in a big red shirt district...so both of my girls have classmates a FULL year older than them.
I did that with the thought in my head that if they REALLY struggle, to hold back in K isn't a big deal....but at least I'd know where they are.
They are both doing GREAT. My DD in 1st is actually in the higher ability learner program (enrichment for those at the top of the class at this point since she's just in first grade).
SO I'm all for pushing her to the next grade and sort of "pushing" a child...vs "giving them a legs up"
She is still young, friendships aren't hard and fast at this point and I'm sure she will readjust quickly.
So I would do it. Think about how kids learn a language better when they are younger...well, I think that applies to a lot of things....not just language, so why not challenge them rather than make it "easy" for them to be at the top of the class.
(flamesuit on)
I would not advance her.
I was one of the youngest kids in my class. I was also one of the smartest, and was often bored. However, socially/emotionally (and later, during the teen years, physically) I was behind. It led to a lot of awkwardness, self-doubt, low self-confidence, etc. on my part. Holding kids back was not an option when I was a child (I was born 14 days shy of the cutoff), but if I had a chance to push DS ahead (he missed the cutoff by 5 weeks), there is no way I would even consider it!
I also think the lack of maturity (vs. some peers) hurt my schoolwork. There are concepts that an older mind graps more easily, etc. And my angst b/c of social issues hurt me in school (and I grew out of that lack of self-confidence, but not until I left that school when I graduated!).
Also, in terms of being "advanced," - some of that may just be her pre-k program. Our public school has a 1/2 day kindergarten, while many working parents enroll their kindergarteners in the Catholic school b/c it is full day. When first grade starts, you can DEFINATELY tell the Catholic school kids vs. the public school kids. Their handwriting is better, they start reading at a higher level, etc. However, I was told the "advancement," all evens out by 3rd grade.
I'm not sure what kind of help I'll be, as I'm struggling with much the same issue. I agree with all of the PPs... both pro and con, because there are so many sides to the issue. The main thing to consider is your child - is "your" child ready for the challenge? Will "your" child have social/developmental issues? Self-esteem issues? Will there be more positive or negative consequences for her?
Also, are there any mid-point options to consider, such as enrolling her in an advanced after-school program, or making sure she gets into the advanced 1st grade next year instead of the regular 1st grade this year? (That's what we're doing with our DD, who is testing above a 1st grade + 5 months level nationally) For my DD, K is mostly fun time, and she does spend a lot of time teaching/helping the other kids. I could resent that, but I think there are learning opportunities in that process, so I'm ok with it. My DD is happy currently, and because we do science experiments, math games and lots of reading at home, she's still challenged, just not in class. The most important thing is to trust your gut, "read" your child to determine what's best for her, then feel confidence in your decision. GL!
"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."
Miracle DD born 12.2005
TTC #2 since Dec 2008 w/ PCOS
***P/SAIF Always Welcome***
Keep it Natural, Baby!
Mom of 2 GT kids here!
I say move her up, especially if she has the maturity to handle it. They took the cautious route just to make sure, and the school at this point thinks she'll do well if moved into 1st grade. She'll likely thrive at the top of the first grade group. Mature, gifted kids usually figure out the routines very quickly and adapt to a new classroom with little trouble.
My DD has a late birthday, and she has never been troubled by this. The only "bad" year she had in school was in 3rd grade, and that was because the teacher really didn't challenge the kids much at all. Now she's in a highly selective magnet, and she loves it. She just started middle school. ALL of her friends are more physically developed than she is, and she hasn't really started to grow much taller yet. She still looks like a skinny little girl surrounded by teenagers! But my particular kid is pretty unflappable, and she's dealing with it. She has a good group of friends who are supportive and not bi-otchy.
DS's birthday is mere days before the cutoff in our state, and we did hold him in pre-K for an add'l year, although he was reading well at age 4. He was less mature and independent than his sister was at the same age, and he struggles with fine motor. He needed an add'l year of maturity under his belt.
So, I've gone through this type of decision 2x, and to me it really depended on the child. I know I did the right thing for both of my kids.
Can you observe the 1st grade class she would move into?
When I was growing up we had a gal who jumped not one but two grades into our class because of where she was at academically. For us it never was a big deal, then when it came time for sports, she was a starter all through jr.high and HS..
If you're given the option to bump up a grade I'd say go for it at this point. My DD really needs to be tested and bumped up but the school is reluctant to do so for who knows what reason (she's bored on the smart end which leads to the misbehaving in her case because she isn't getting challenged)..
I'm in a district where people tend to do the opposite - hold their children (esp. boys) back a year even if they make the cutoff).
Do they have a gifted and talented program? If yes, I would enroll her in g&t and keep her in the grade she is at. She may be scoring high b/c she has already gone through kindergarten. That effect will wear off / even out in a year or two. It is VERY hard to tell which kids are gifted in KINDERGARTEN and which just came from a better pre-k program. Even if her scores are better nationally, you need to realize that a child in an affluent suburban MA district is going to score higher than many kids around the country.