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What is the etiquette for .....

howleyshellhowleyshell member
in School-Aged Children

siblings at birthday parties?

Mine are 17 months apart.  I only take the child whose name is on the invitation unless it says "siblings welcome" or if it's a family friend where we always include all siblings.

However... I'm shocked to see how many people DO bring siblings that I know were not invited by name.

What's the right thing to do?

Or does it depend on the type of party?  If it's a back yard blow out what's a few extra kids vs. a bounce house situation where you're paying by the head?

 

 

Our IF journey: 1 m/c, 1 IVF with only 3 eggs retrieved yielding Dylan and a lost twin, 1 shocker unmedicated BFP resulting in Jace, 3 more unmedicated pregnancies ending in more losses.
Total score: 6 pregnancies, 5 losses, 2 amazing blessings that I'm thankful for every single day.
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Re: What is the etiquette for .....

  • wlm740wlm740

    When I had one child who was about 5 and another who was 2 1/2  I would bring my 2 year old if I had to stay at the party.  I didn't want to get a sitter so that my 5 year old could go to a party.  If it was drop off I would not send my 2 year old. 

     Now that my oldest is 7, and my second is almost 5, I would not bring him unless I discussed it with the host first, because he would be old enough to participate in party activities.  Know what I mean?

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  • littlemermaidlittlemermaid member
    I only bring the child that was invited. 
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  • HarrietNJMommyHarrietNJMommy

    imagelittlemermaid:
    I only bring the child that was invited. 

    This. My kids are all about 1.5 years apart. I can't imagine bringing all 3 kids to each bday party. 

    image Mommy to Barbara 11/8/05, Elisabeth 5/13/07, Loukas 12/23/08 and Lazarus 09/25/12
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  • jeroljerol
    I have only ever brought the child invited.  I was shocked by the amount of kids that came to DD's party at Bounce U with a sibling BUT the parent stayed and they tried to paid that child's way (My package was bigger than what was coming so I told them not to worry about it).  I definitely understand being the only parent home and having to bring another baby but some of them had both parents there with them.  I thought that was strange- DH and I always trade off and one stays home and one goes.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • shouldbworkinshouldbworkin
    I do the same thing and I can't tell you how many times I've shown up with one child and the host has asked me where the other one is.  Well ... you didn't invite the other one so why would I bring him/her?  I want them to have their own friends, they need that separation from each other.  They fight enough as it is b/c they're close in age and do everything at the same time.  I expect they'll always have some friends in common, but I have no problem leaving the other one at home for a bday party they weren't expressly invited too.  It's usually a good excuse to spend some one on one time with the other parent anyway. 
    DS1 age 7, DD age 5 and DS2 born 4/3/12
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  • dpdwdpdw member
    I would only bring the one invited no matter what the type of party.  Although once I couldn't get a sitter for #2 & it wasn't a drop-off party, but it was a back-yard party so I called the host & asked if I could bring both.  If it had been the type of party where they are restricted by the number of guests I would have declined the invitation.
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  • jlw2505jlw2505 member
    I personally would never make an assumption that it is OK to bring anyone not listed on the invite.  Yes, it can be hard on my girls when only one is invited to a party but we always sit them down and explain the why around it and whoever is not going to the party gets to do something fun with Mom or Dad.  I always make it clean on my invites if a sibling is invited and on the few occasions where I don't have a sitter or my DH is busy and can't watch my other DD, I have always called the parents in advance and asked their thoughts on my other child coming.  Bringing my other child is not something that I normally do and I try my best to not have to.  I think its important for kids to go places and do things with their own friends.
    Jenni Mom to DD#1 - 6-16-06 DD#2 - 3-13-08 
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