paci users poll: when to get rid of pacifier?
I've read so much conflicting info about this - some pedis say by 6 months, others that it doesn't matter as long as they're gone by the time the child is 3 years old - that I thought I'd ask you ladies your opinions/what your pedi has said.
My guys still use pacifiers when they sleep, but haven't used them outside of their cribs since they were about 12 months old (that's also when they gave up bottles). They use them to fall asleep, but don't seem to actually sleep with them in their mouths, from what I've seen when I need to sneak into their room at night. They probably only actually have them in their mouths for ~10 min a day, so they're not sucking on them all the time.
We had a vague goal of ditching nighttime pacis at around 18 months, but now that it's so close, I'm feeling like a weenie and not wanting to do it lol. 
We tried it one night and it was such hell that I broke down and gave them back.
I know it will be hard for several nights no matter when we get rid of them - I'm just wondering if it would be easier if they were closer to 2 years old and could understand what's happening a bit better. Or am I just being a big wuss and need to just suck it up and do it now?
Re: paci users poll: when to get rid of pacifier?
Based on advice from friends, I'm planning to do it closer to 2 years. He still likes his paci and since he's not the best sleeper, we rely on it for nighttime soothing. I'm not confident enough to go cold turkey, so I'm going to try my friend's approach: cutting the nipple, but still letting him have it at first. Her daughter was able to understand that it was "broken" and stopped showing interest after a few days. I'm also secretly hoping he'll naturally give it up, sort of like he did with BFing and bottles. We'll see, but I'm not looking forward to it!
Based on the craptacular experience we had trying to go cold turkey, this is what I'm thinking of doing as well.
Since they only use them to get to sleep, I'm seriously considering waiting longer (at least until next year). Maybe they shouldn't have that "crutch" but then I think, eh, lovies and nursing to sleep are "crutches" too, kwim? *sigh* I just dunno.
life in oz
I didn't vote because I honestly don't know what is best/when it should be done. We were an avid paci user for a while but B ended up weaning himself off of it before 1yr old. Basically, B hates napping/sleeping, so we put in like 2 dozen pacis so that he'd have one in the crib even if it falls out/gets thrown out. Well, what he ended up doing as he got older, he'd go around and gather all each paci and end up throwing ALL the pacis out of his crib on purpose (as to say "OH yeah? You can't fool me with these. I'm not napping!"), then protest his nap (CIO), get tired, and fall asleep without any pacis. So he just stopped using them for sleeping, but then when he'd see a paci in the car or on a table, he'd suck on it out of boredom (but never cried when I took it back out), so we just put all the pacis away and that was that.
But if he still wanted to use it, I actually think somewhere between 18mo-2yr would've been when I would want to work on getting rid of it. I might do something kinda cold-turkey-ish, where I'd just not put back the pacis that fall out/get thrown out the crib (then it's kinda like he's doing it to himself in a way by not keeping the pacis in the crib =P) and see where things go from there, but that's just kinda what we did with B.
We also only use it for falling asleep. And I, too, had originally loosely planned on ditching it by 18 months. Now I'm leaning more towards two. He usually sleeps so well, I hate to rock the boat, you know?
I also think I'll probably try the "broken paci" route by cutting the nipples and see how that goes.
I obviously don't have any experience, and E stopped using one very early on, but I've heard of a few different approaches. several coworkers weaned their kids from nighttime paci use at 3. here are some other options -
1. a bye bye paci ceremony. eg: "One day, I showed her an article I was reading in Parents with an image of the pacifier tied to a balloon. I explained that we had to do that soon. Within the next 24 hours, she told me she was ready to do that. So we did. I wish I got a picture of her face, it was priceless. We made a big deal of the whole thing, got special balloons from the supermarket. A few difficult nights passed and before we knew it we were pacifier-free."
2. not buy anymore (though, I don't see how this would work if they stay in the crib - "you have five pacifiers left. we're not buying anymore so if you lose them we're not replacing them." I think her last one fell in the toilet and that was that. no arguments or complaints, she was in charge of keeping track of her own pacifiers and she eventually lost them all. :-)"
3. an event - trip to grandmas, etc, and say pacis don't go on the airplane/to grandma's/etc. make a big deal of leaving the paci at home and stop cold turkey
I was originally planning to wean Elyse from them at about two. She used to only have them at nap/bed time, but since our move has been so traumatic on her she has started wanting them all the time.
Like potty training and moving to a big girl bed, we've put off weaning from the soother until she's more settled and ready.
I'm not really worried about it. However, I do make sure we leave it out when we go out in public so people don't judge me.
Married Bio
We were going to get rid of them at 18 months so that she'd have plenty of time to get used to no pacis by the time the baby came when she was 2.
But her doctor said that when the baby comes, she might regress or need them to self soothe. Plus, they'll help her adjust out of her crib and into her big girl bed better. So she recommended that we let her keep them until she's 2 1/2.
She suggested that we allow them ONLY for sleeping, which for us meant phasing them out of the car seat and stroller. I think that by the time she's 2 1/2 we'll be able to explain that pacis are for babies and mail them to grandma.
So that is our plan and why we are doing it the way we are. If it wasn't for Henry tho, we would probably have phased them out already.
Malia & Dave & Alexa
Happily married since 2-17-08! Three since 9-9-09!
Baby Blog
I just quit offering them recently (w/in the last month so 19ish months) rather than have them scattered throughout the house I put them in a bowl up in a cupboard) and would wait until he asked for it. He went about 2 weeks without asking but then got the stomach flu earlier this week and woke up to throw up over and over again and then started asking. I think if he had not been sick he wouldn't have woken up and probably wouldn't have needed it. AND to top it all off he puked on his lovey bear the first night so he didn't have that comfort tool either.
I'm fine with that because he was in pain and wanted something to soothe him and he only uses it for bedtime.