Need more dust for Gramma

futrkingsley · October 2011

My gramma got lysteria two weeks ago. She's been in the hospital since then, except for this weekend, when she was transferred to a nursing home. We visited her yesterday with C and my dad and had a good visit. She wanted to talk about her funeral and all the arrangements, which was fine by me. I listened and held her hand and stroked her head. My dad was not so accepting, for reasons I'm not clear about. C sang her a song and made her laugh.

It was a long long drive to and from yesterday and the restlessness and exhaustion doesn't help us with our issues at home.

So today she got worse and went back to the hospital. My dad is very upset and told my brothers that if they intended to visit they better do it tonight. I intended to go too but my dad told me I should stay home since it's a two hour drive in the dark by myself. I don't feel capable of doing it safely but I feel sad and a bit guilty about it. My dad said she's in and out and we have no idea how long she'll last (hours, days, weeks). I don't want to disappoint them but I also have to take care of myself and my son.

We could use some dust. I haven't said anything on FB because I'm friends with many extended family who I don't think know about her illness.

tri_bride05 · October 2011

I'm so sorry S. Sending lots of hugs to you and dust to your Gramma.

SweetieP · October 2011

Oh man. I'm so so sorry. Lots of dust for your gramma...and hugs for you!

lunabeam · October 2011

I'm so sorry! Loads of dust for your Gramma. I hope she is on the mend very soon and you can visit with her.

jsugrin · October 2011

I'm so sorry S. Tons of dust headed your way, that hangs on until you are able to make it to see her and that when it's time that she goes as easily and painlessly as possible. My grandmother just died yesterday morning after 4 weeks of hospice so I am right in your shoes. She was 98 1/2 (she was hysterical reminding all the Dr.'s of that 1/2) and passed away with while my mom was eating her breakfast and holding her hand :::sigh:::: very sweet, very difficult, yet very much what my grandmother wanted by then. Holding you close sweetie Left Hug

Dragonfly_Bride · October 2011

Sending lots of dust! I've been thinking about her a lot and sending positive vibes since you shared last time about her illness.

futrkingsley · October 2011

Thank you friends. DH and I went to see her today and held her hand as she had her last rites. We stayed for hours just holding her hand while she asked to go. She asked for morphine and one she had enough drugs she relaxed and slept. I needed to get back to DS so we said goodbye and expect to hear news later tonight that she was called home and is no longer suffering. Thank you for all the support.

tri_bride05 · October 2011

Oh S, I'm so, so sorry. I lost both Grandmothers this year and it's so tough. I'm glad you were able to say goodbye. Big, big hugs.

NCSW · October 2011

I'm thinking of you and your Gramma. ((HUG))

jsugrin · October 2011

futrkingsley:
Thank you friends. DH and I went to see her today and held her hand as she had her last rites. We stayed for hours just holding her hand while she asked to go. She asked for morphine and one she had enough drugs she relaxed and slept. I needed to get back to DS so we said goodbye and expect to hear news later tonight that she was called home and is no longer suffering. Thank you for all the support.

Oh S I am crying tears of joy that you were able to be there, holding her hand as the last rites were administered, I can only imagine how much that meant for her, and hopefully that you will be able to find lifelong peace in that moment. I really related to her asking to go. That was the hardest part with my Grandmother, she was getting to be so angry and anxious that she just wouldn't die! My grandfather had predeceased her by about 35 years so I told her " poor Grandpa had given up on you ever ever showing up so now the poor guy is scrambling around like crazy trying to get everything ready for you, you know after all this time he wants it to be perfect. Cut him a little slack G'ma, he's got an awful lot to pull together for you Smile ." I think it was just what she needed to help calm down about it but it was so hard to know she was beyond ready, how do you hope every day that she just dies already, ya know. So fvcking hard.