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TTC after 35
solarflare
member
TTC has made me into a party pooper
solarflare
member
in TTC after 35
Seriously, I used to be FUN! We would go out all the time, drink, party, see shows, have crazy nights with friends...
Now, I am scared to do anything because it might hurt something or other. I never have more than a few drinks (even that's a lot now) and I try to think of ways to avoid the crazier nights because I know I won't be as fun. I still do things and just don't partake in the drinking...but I just hate this. I used to be the girl that would jump into a cold river no questions asked.
I also already realized that a huge crazy anniversary party next month is going to fall right at the IUI time. DH has already told me he really wants to party, and I do not want to be a downer. Yet I am. I hate this aspect of myself now.
I know we happen to hang around with people that partake in a lot of "fun" substances, foods, experiences, but they all get pregnant by accident, and well into their late 30's. And me, being good, I still can't get k/u. I don't know what to do about this. I feel like I am losing part of my fun crazy side, which is fine, but I just don't like having to place controls on myself and DH all the time.
I guess this is just a vent - thanks for listening.
ttc since 2/2010 ~
me (36): Hypothyroid (on Levothroid), low vit. d, borderline/high fsh (day 3: between 7-10) (day 10: 13 during CCCT), AFC: 14
dh (31): awesome (minus one sample with agglutination)
Diagnosis:possible DOR and/or unexplained + elevated NK cells + MTHFR (C677T - one copy)
MAY 2011 - FEB 2012 - 3 injectable IUI's with numerous cancellations due to high TSH levels
MAY 2012 - onto IVF/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol) on BCP and Folgard (3 week delay - cyst - boooo) 5/21 start stims 5/30 ER 11R 8M 3F 6/2 3DT of 3 6/12 Beta #1 83 | 6/14 Beta #2 196 | 6/21 Beta #3 3818 | 6/28 Beta #4 22,213 | 7/2 1st U/S - 2 on board! 8/24 CVS reveals that we have a boy AND a girl on board!
Healthy baby boy and girl born in February, 2013 at 38 weeks and 2 days!
me (36): Hypothyroid (on Levothroid), low vit. d, borderline/high fsh (day 3: between 7-10) (day 10: 13 during CCCT), AFC: 14
dh (31): awesome (minus one sample with agglutination)
Diagnosis:possible DOR and/or unexplained + elevated NK cells + MTHFR (C677T - one copy)
MAY 2011 - FEB 2012 - 3 injectable IUI's with numerous cancellations due to high TSH levels
MAY 2012 - onto IVF/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol) on BCP and Folgard (3 week delay - cyst - boooo) 5/21 start stims 5/30 ER 11R 8M 3F 6/2 3DT of 3 6/12 Beta #1 83 | 6/14 Beta #2 196 | 6/21 Beta #3 3818 | 6/28 Beta #4 22,213 | 7/2 1st U/S - 2 on board! 8/24 CVS reveals that we have a boy AND a girl on board!
Healthy baby boy and girl born in February, 2013 at 38 weeks and 2 days!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: TTC has made me into a party pooper
the fun me disappeared too. It sucks. I have to find her.
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
I totally know how you feel. I've given up alcohol, caffeine, sugar, and wheat (basically everything good and fun in my life). Lately, I've been fudging on the alcohol just because I need something to take the edge off once in awhile. But I also stress out about being with friends because I can't let loose like I used to.
It helps me to think about five or ten years from now, when I'll be done with IF (hopefully with a couple of kids), and I can go out and tie one on a couple of times a year. Some of my friends in their mid-40s are having a blast now that they're done having kids and their kids are old enough to not be so dependent on them. There is a light at the end of the tunnel.
TTC #2 since July 2010
March 2012 IVF (MDL Protocol) Started stims 3/3; ER 3/11 (9R, 8M, 7F) ET 3/16 (5dt of 2 blasts graded 3AB and 3BA, 3 frosties(!!) Beta 3/26 = 386; Beta 3/28 = 827; u/s 4/11 says TWINS! Boy/Girl Twins delivered at 36 weeks 6 days
It sucks!!!! I went to a dinner Friday night and drank water while all my friends enjoyed wine. and now that this cycle was cancelled, unless I want to wait till January since my RE lab will be closed in Dec for inspection etc, I will try again in Nov but it looks like the start is going to come right smack in the middle of a girls winery/spa weekend celebration for my BF 40th birthday. I feel horrible over the possibility of missing it and horrible that even if I can make it I will be stimming so certainly not joining in the wine celebrating
and all of that would be fine if this was going to work but things don't look promising and there are no guarantees as you already know.
vent away and try to hang in there.
TTC #1 unofficially since 6/09, officially since 10/10
6/11 RE testing,rt tube blocked with hydro, 8/11 lap surgery rt tl
IVF#1 10/11 Estrace,450 Follistim, 15 units low-dose HCG, DHEA - cancelled (only follie growing)
IVF#2 started stims 11/4/11 - same protocol, increase in concentration of HCG, added CoQ10, no response, cancelled on CD 12
12/2/11 began accupuncture; Break in Dec. Next cycle anticipated in Jan.
PAIF/SAIF Welcome
I totally relate to everything in this post. The "fun" me is gone. I just want something to happen and this whole IF process to be over. There are plenty of days I just don't have the strength to do it and just want to give up. In my quest to become pregnant I am now revamping my whole diet and that means no alcohol. The old me would have had a drink or two in the two weeks prior to ovulation. Now I am giving it all up and a bunch of other stuff that I enjoyed as well. IF sucks!
I am so sorry to hear so many of you have all reached party pooper status as well.
Now we need to get off this train so that we can start reclaiming our fun parts again!
me (36): Hypothyroid (on Levothroid), low vit. d, borderline/high fsh (day 3: between 7-10) (day 10: 13 during CCCT), AFC: 14
dh (31): awesome (minus one sample with agglutination)
Diagnosis:possible DOR and/or unexplained + elevated NK cells + MTHFR (C677T - one copy)
MAY 2011 - FEB 2012 - 3 injectable IUI's with numerous cancellations due to high TSH levels
MAY 2012 - onto IVF/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol) on BCP and Folgard (3 week delay - cyst - boooo) 5/21 start stims 5/30 ER 11R 8M 3F 6/2 3DT of 3 6/12 Beta #1 83 | 6/14 Beta #2 196 | 6/21 Beta #3 3818 | 6/28 Beta #4 22,213 | 7/2 1st U/S - 2 on board! 8/24 CVS reveals that we have a boy AND a girl on board!
Healthy baby boy and girl born in February, 2013 at 38 weeks and 2 days!
UGH! This is exactly what I mean. This stuff invades on celebratory life events in an unforgiving way. I am so sorry - that is a real bummer!
me (36): Hypothyroid (on Levothroid), low vit. d, borderline/high fsh (day 3: between 7-10) (day 10: 13 during CCCT), AFC: 14
dh (31): awesome (minus one sample with agglutination)
Diagnosis:possible DOR and/or unexplained + elevated NK cells + MTHFR (C677T - one copy)
MAY 2011 - FEB 2012 - 3 injectable IUI's with numerous cancellations due to high TSH levels
MAY 2012 - onto IVF/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol) on BCP and Folgard (3 week delay - cyst - boooo) 5/21 start stims 5/30 ER 11R 8M 3F 6/2 3DT of 3 6/12 Beta #1 83 | 6/14 Beta #2 196 | 6/21 Beta #3 3818 | 6/28 Beta #4 22,213 | 7/2 1st U/S - 2 on board! 8/24 CVS reveals that we have a boy AND a girl on board!
Healthy baby boy and girl born in February, 2013 at 38 weeks and 2 days!
I have done a lot of giving up also - switched to decaf or half decaf, limit my alcohol intake, trrryyyy to limit sugar... but none of this has helped and my quality of life was much better before I had all of these limitations. Sometimes I wonder whether these life modifications are worth it, and then I persist and endure.
me (36): Hypothyroid (on Levothroid), low vit. d, borderline/high fsh (day 3: between 7-10) (day 10: 13 during CCCT), AFC: 14
dh (31): awesome (minus one sample with agglutination)
Diagnosis:possible DOR and/or unexplained + elevated NK cells + MTHFR (C677T - one copy)
MAY 2011 - FEB 2012 - 3 injectable IUI's with numerous cancellations due to high TSH levels
MAY 2012 - onto IVF/ICSI (Antagonist Protocol) on BCP and Folgard (3 week delay - cyst - boooo) 5/21 start stims 5/30 ER 11R 8M 3F 6/2 3DT of 3 6/12 Beta #1 83 | 6/14 Beta #2 196 | 6/21 Beta #3 3818 | 6/28 Beta #4 22,213 | 7/2 1st U/S - 2 on board! 8/24 CVS reveals that we have a boy AND a girl on board!
Healthy baby boy and girl born in February, 2013 at 38 weeks and 2 days!
So sympathize!!
I was just whining to MH last night about a concert I bought tickets for many months ago. I was so excited about it... and now it is scheduled for this weekend - somehow I will end up being the DD. MH got kind of annoyed with my whining because he was like - is it all about the drinking?? Don't you also really like the band? Of course I do, but I was feeling sorry for myself. It isn't the night I had imagined, ya know? Well I do know you guys understand, thankfully someone does. sigh.