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Pre-School and Daycare
macaroni1979
member
Doesn't talk at school and plays alone :(
macaroni1979
member
Last week, I asked Josie's teacher how she was doing in class, and I was told that she is very quiet and plays on her own. This is so bizarre to me because she is super outgoing and loud at home, on play dates (a cpl times a week) and in general. I sah, so she has never made friends on her own, like in daycare. I am thinking that is the issue. So I asked another mother that I see at drop off, if she would like to have a play date. I am hoping this will help Josie feel more comfortable at school. What else would you do? It makes me sad 
Josie Cailin 7/25/08
Asher Mason 7/19/10
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Doesn't talk at school and plays alone :(
I don't have any good suggestions, but we are in the EXACT same boat here. Actually, at free play she usually stands by the teacher, not playing at all.
Last week we made some headway. Wed was show and tell, and from the beginning, she didn't want to bring anything. At the last minute, she decided to bring her blocks with her. During free time, one of the little boys asked if he could play with her and her blocks, so for the first time, she played with someone. Friday she brought a different set of blocks and the same little boy asked her to play. I hope we have turned a corner, but I doubt it. I am sure we will be two steps forward, one step back. I was so worried last week, before Wed, that I was worried that maybe there was some major issue.
I have to remember that my daughter is always like this in new situations, and my daughter, like yours, has always been with myself or my husband. It breaks my heart, but it has only been a few weeks. I am trying to be patient, and focus on the fact that she seems happy to go.
There are a set of twin girls in my daughter's preschool class. They, along with my daughter started last year so this is their second year at the school. One of the twins was exactly as you describe your daughter. She played alone, stuck VERY close to the teacher and didn't really take any big risks, so to speak. Last year at Field Day, I remember how much we had to encourage her along in order to get her to participate in the activities.
This year, however, she is a completely different little girl. She's so outgoing, always smiling, playing with the other students and while she likes the teacher, she's no longer shadowing close behind. I think if you give your daughter gentle encouragement (which may include making her participate in certain activities; i.e. "Field Day") and be patient with her she'll make tremendous progress in her own time and in her own way. I think the play date you scheduled is a good place to start. Getting her more familiar with the kids she spends time with at school will help in making her more comfortable. I'm sure she'll make progress soon!
DD is 3 and was always home with me or my mother and struggled her first week at pre-school. She stood in the corner and quietly played by herself. She is very shy at first, but she is usually quite social with her cousins and plays very well at the park and at parties and on play dates.
So I set up a play date with the mother of another little girl who was struggling and that made a world of difference. They played one on one the first weekend of school, and now they are "best friends" and have started branching out together and meeting other kids. Good luck - I'm sure it's just a phase.
DS is like this as well even though he's wild at home. But he's like this in almost all situations out of his comfort zone, so we sort of expected it. I think with time, they'll slowly start to make friends in class and speak up more. I think DS uttered his first sentence last week when they gave out cupcakes for someone's birthday. They give him a vanilla one and he went up to the teacher and said he wanted a chocolate one instead. hahaha