Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Don't know what to do...
Is it your pedi who is suggesting pulling your DD out of school? Does she see an asthma specialist or pulmonologist? If it is a specialist telling you this I would probably follow the advice. If it's your pedi, I would get a second opinion from a specialist before taking such a drastic step.
Good luck!
My twins are 5! My baby is 3!
DS#2 - Allergic to Cashew, Pistachio, Kiwi
DS#3 - Allergic to Milk, Egg, Peanut, Tree Nuts and Sesame
Honestly......I think your doctor's suggestion is kind of weird. I can't imagine a doctor telling you to keep an otherwise healthy 3 year old out of school.
I get being nervous (both my boys have asthma issues....), but at some point, she is going to have to be able to be in a school setting. I actually think it is better for them to be exposed now rather than in Kinder and beyond when you really don't want her missing school.
You said she is on inhalers. Is she using them consistently? Also, is she on any allergy medications? You might want to try Singulair or some Zyrtec.
I agree with the PP. If her situation is serious enough to pull her out of school it seems like she should be seeing a specialist anyway. Certainly get a second opinion before taking such a drastic step especially since it sounds like you aren't 100% sure or in agreement with the doctor.
I would also talk with the teachers and explain her situation. Maybe they could be extra diligent about having her wash her hands A LOT and keep the room clean and surfaces washed as much as they can.
I think that's REALLY weird advice for a doctor to give. What are you going to do when she's 5 or 6?
I would see a specialist for an opinion or at the very least see another general practice pediatrician. Alot of kids have asthma, RSV, etc. and continue to go to school.
My daughter has a history of asthma with viruses ever since a bad case of RSV almost 2 years ago. Her pediatric pulmonologist warned us that her first winter in school would be difficult in terms of colds/asthma. But he also said that will be true whether her first year is at 3 or 5 or 15 or college, so not to change our lives to accommodate this. As he put it, she's going to go through this at some point, it won't be fun or easy, but it's just what's going to happen.
She started school a month ago and spent this past weekend wheezing after having had a cold. It wasn't fun, but I gave her her inhaler (he prefers inhaler treatments to nebulizer treatments), started her on prednisone, and she got over it. Any kid will be sick a lot their first year of school because they are building immunity that year. I'd keep her in and know it will get better!
Hmmmm... maybe I am in the minority but I would consider pulling her out of school if you don't need the childcare and can compensate with activities at home. Especially if you have a baby too.
My son had a horrible first winter with wheezing/asthma issues that landed us in the hospital a half a dozen times. His last two winters have been better and I am more hopeful for this winter. I do everything in my power to keep him healthy (lots of healthy foods and water, extra sleep, vitamins, tons of handwashing) and that means we sometimes miss out on things in the winter time like storytimes or music class. This winter I will be extra careful because DD is so young and I don't know if she will have the same asthmatic issues.
Do what seems best for YOUR child and YOUR family. And good luck!
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I love these two beautiful children!
As someone who has taught preschool (3's), 1st grade, 3rd grade, and 6th grade I strongly believe that preschool is hugely important. A solid year before kindergarten is vital. I'm working with 3's right now, and am seeing these kids learn to socialize. I look across the hall at the 4's and the ones that don't know how to sit in circle, use kind, productive words when talking to other kids, and interact with adults other than family are kind of lost and at a big disadvantage. Some days I feel like what we're doing isn't getting these kids anywhere but I have to remember that it's about laying foundations. I'm laying their foundations for next year, which lays their foundations for kindergarten. It's definitely a big deal, imo. However, if your child is going to be like pp's child and in the hospital several times over this I'd definitely skip it and cross your fingers she catches up next year. You can't replace school with activities at home or even in your community, but it's not worth several hospital stays. GL
My oldest is the same- constantly on nebulizers, ear infections (we have had 4 sets of tubes), reactive airway disease, sinus infections, etc. She was ALWAYS sick until she was 4. She was in F/T daycare. I had to work. I also had a ped tell me that it would be better if I stayed at home. I told him I would be happy to do if he paid my bills!
Anyway, the last year or so has been so much better. I agree with the previous post that said it doesn't matter when your child starts school she will have these problems. So, it may just be 2 years from now.
I brought home little micro-premie twins and Callum's had lung problems (probably in part b/c of the ventilator). I understand the concern. Harm brings home everything from school and it gets to Cally. Next year he starts and so we are bracing ourselves but hoping for the best. It really is hard. Throw in that I have a seriously compromised immune system I feel frustrated there isn't more we can do.
With that said for our family we have found pre-school as invaluable. Seriously Harmon has grown so much socially and academically in one of pre-k than I could have ever imagined. For me I would do everything in my power before pulling him.
Also I realize you are concerned about the new baby but something to keep in mind this is a hard time for your older chid. I didn't realize that until after a few months but the older child's world is thrown apart. I wish Harmon had something like pre-k back in those days. He was struggling not being the center of our world anymore. I think for kids in this boat it means a lot to have an outlet where they can be really stimulated. It helps blow off steam so to say.