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What do you call your IL's?

Ashnmike528Ashnmike528 member
in Upstate NY Babies

And I don't mean behind their backs. :-)

Believe it or not, I have never addressed my MIL or FIL to their face. "Mom and Dad" just feels strange, because they are not my parents, and using their first names makes me feel uncomfortable.  I am thinking I will just refer to them as what DD calls them, Oma and Granddad.

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Re: What do you call your IL's?

  • meryltheresameryltheresa

    DH's dad and stepmom = Their first names.

    DH's mom and stepdad = I will not use such words in the presence of you ladies.   :)

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  • missyjgmissyjg member
    When my MIL was alive, I struggled with this. She was insistent that I called her "mom". Honestly, I couldn't bring myself to do that b/c as you said, she wasn't my mom. To other people I'd call her by her first name, but to her, I would try to not use any salutation. We didn't get along very well either, so that didn't help. If I had B I would call her "grandma" I think, but since B wasn't born until after MIL passed away, I didn't have that option. It was awkward.

    TTC since 6/2003. m/c 9/14/03 8 weeks, 5 chemical pregnancies, mmc 6/04 12 weeks, Michael born sleeping 5/25/05 at 22weeks always our angel, fought ovarian cancer and won, m/c 4/06 5.2 weeks and 7/07 6.6 weeks,Our Miracle baby girl born 4/8/10,mc 12/18/11 at 5.3 weeks, BFP 10/26/12 dating u/s on 11/8/12 showing a strong heartbeat!EDD July 4,2013. RCS on 6/27. Baby boy in NICU for 8 long and scary days before he was able to come home. We are now a happy family of 4

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  • BitsyKellyBitsyKelly
    I use their first names, but now that we have kids it's mostly Grandma and Papa.  DH is the same with my parents.
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  • wendyjwendyj member
    I use their first names. Thankfully, they never insisted that I do otherwise. I'd feel weird calling them Mom and Dad. I love them a bunch, but can't get myself to do it.
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  • sunnygirl05sunnygirl05
    I call them by their first name.  It would feel funny to call them Mom and Dad.  Sometimes I'll call them Grandma and Grandpa if my kids are right there.
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  • prncsstpprncsstp
    imageAshnmike528:

    And I don't mean behind their backs. :-)

    Believe it or not, I have never addressed my MIL or FIL to their face. "Mom and Dad" just feels strange, because they are not my parents, and using their first names makes me feel uncomfortable.  I am thinking I will just refer to them as what DD calls them, Oma and Granddad.

    Guilty of this too! Although sometimes, Ill call MIL "mom" or :"new mom". DH's stepmother I call by her first name, DH's dad - I dont really call him anything, although he is sometimes refered to "dad" - but not often, that feels funny to me.  

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  • TinaL99TinaL99 member

    MIL has mentioned to me that I can call her Mom and that she would like it since I'm like the daughter she never had.  I still can't bring myself to call her "Mom" even though I love her like my own mother, it's just weird to me.  I use their first names if'/when I have to.  Or of course Grandma/Grandpa.

    DD1: 3/31/10 DD2: 9/7/11
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  • olivia_eveolivia_eve
    I call them by their first names, but it took me about 10 years to do it. MIL noticed, and said that she has never called her MIL by her name ever- she's been married for over 30 years! Made me feel much better about waiting 10.
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  • xKimxxKimx

    I don't :)

    We haven't had contact with them in over a year. 

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  • abba916abba916

    I call them by their first names- or grandma and grandpa...

    My BILs girlfriend calls them mom and dad and has her kids call them g-ma and g-pa ...but they arent married and it just drives me nuts... 

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  • jewelsonujewelsonu
    I call her by her first name.  Dh's grandma I call grandma
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  • TelycoTelyco

    I struggle with this a lot.

    If my MIL calls me she says "hi, telyco! it's Mom lastname"...I have been *thisclose* to taking the plunge but just can't do it.

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  • jnk062602jnk062602

    I call them mom and dad.  It is not natural, but I do it because they want me to, and what does it hurt?  It doesn't take away anything from my parents.

    When I first met them, MIL wanted me to call her mom.  I had only been dating DH for a few months.  I also wasn't really wanting to call her by her first name, bc of how I grew up it just felt right to call her Mrs Lastname.  Which she said made her feel like FIL's mom (who is deceased).  She didn't offer her first name, she insisted on mom.  So until we got married (or maybe engaged?) I just never called her anything.  I would just go right up to her to start talking instead of calling her something.  It was akward.

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  • goosh24goosh24
    I call them by their first names or whatever their grandparent name is (we've got a Grammy, grampy, Nana, grandpa, etc, between all the parents). Sometimes I call dh's stepdad Dad Tom, because that's what his family always says to distinguish between the dads. But it just seems like his name so kind of normal.
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  • andyandrachelandyandrachel member
    I call them Mom and Dad but it always feels awkward. I try not to address them by name if I can help it.
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