A question I know was asked but I can't find...

Brandyjean30 · October 2011

Who is using a midwife and who is using an OB?

I had an OB with my m/c and it was handled very matter -of-factly and I was just another person on their assembly line. I went with a different OB this time but was talking to a friend about her midwife and she LOVES her! Now I'm beginning to lean toward the midwife but my husband is very uncomfortable with the idea. He has an idea in his head that I'm going to give birth in our bathtub with some candles and music and that will definitely not be the case. I tried going online and showing him comparisons and he just shut down and told me it was whatever i wanted. So now I'm just wondering what kind of experiences you all have had with each?

sam19 · October 2011

I'll be with an OB because I'm having a RCS. Also, the choice for midwives in this area is very, very limited.

sam19 · October 2011

Also, I think you should schedule an appointment with a midwife if that is what you want just to discuss what your expectations and what there expectations and normal practices are. Take your husband along so he can ask his own questions and voice his concerns.

Brandyjean30 · October 2011

sam19:
Also, I think you should schedule an appointment with a midwife if that is what you want just to discuss what your expectations and what there expectations and normal practices are. Take your husband along so he can ask his own questions and voice his concerns.

this was my plan (and they can get me in in a week where as my first appointment with the OB wont be until I'm 10 weeks). He is just so against it I don't want to push him but I feel like I need to do what I feel is right for me this time.

lysl23 · October 2011

With my first, I wanted to avoid unnecessary interventions so I had a midwife my whole pregnancy... until I relocated states at 8 mos pregnant. I obv. didn't have time to to be picky so I went with a practice that was recommended to me and whichever doctor they booked me with. He turned out to be amazing and completely changed my view of doctors and I hope he can deliver all of my kids.

That said, I think it is more about finding someone you click with, aren't afraid to ask ANY kind question to, and someone that respects your wishes. IMO its more about the person than their title.

Brandyjean30 · October 2011

lysl23:
With my first, I wanted to avoid unnecessary interventions so I had a midwife my whole pregnancy... until I relocated states at 8 mos pregnant. I obv. didn't have time to to be picky so I went with a practice that was recommended to me and whichever doctor they booked me with. He turned out to be amazing and completely changed my view of doctors and I hope he can deliver all of my kids.
That said, I think it is more about finding someone you click with, aren't afraid to ask ANY kind question to, and someone that respects your wishes. IMO its more about the person than their title.

Did you feel that the doctor was more educated than the midwife? I agree with you that the title shouldn't matter but DH seems to think they got their degree through some phony school and I'm going to get hurt.

hsharick12 · October 2011

I used a midwife for my last pregnancy and LOVED it. I was going to give birth at a birth center, but my baby came more than 3 weeks early so we had to go to the hospital. Luckily, the hospital was really cooperative with her and she basically attended the whole birth with no OB there. I would recommend it if you find one that you really like.

This pregnancy I'll probably have to use an OB because I'm moving around a lot and will eventually be in Japan for the birth.

Discordia1030 · October 2011

Even though I'm more then likely having a rcs, I'll be using a MW. The practice works with rotating doctors at the hospital who perform any actions the MWs aren't allowed to, such as a c/s. The MW will stay by my side the whole time during the surgery, which is more what I want. If I have a rcs, I'll met the OB ahead of time and thats good enough for me. I know the MW will observe and have my best interests at heart, I don't need to have spent a lot of time with the OB in order to feel comfortable with them performing the surgery. I've researched the hospitalists who they work with and would be fine with any of them.

I went to a large OB office last time and felt jostled around by everyone and never was truly comfortable with any of the doctors. I ended up getting the OB I liked the most when I went into labor, but I knew that was pure luck. When we got rushed to the o/r, I only knew 3 people in the room: DH, the OB and the anesthesiologist. It was terrifying and I wish I had someone who knew what exactly was going on sitting next to me, talking me through it. DH did what he could, but it wasn't the same.

Discordia1030 · October 2011

Brandyjean30:
lysl23:
With my first, I wanted to avoid unnecessary interventions so I had a midwife my whole pregnancy... until I relocated states at 8 mos pregnant. I obv. didn't have time to to be picky so I went with a practice that was recommended to me and whichever doctor they booked me with. He turned out to be amazing and completely changed my view of doctors and I hope he can deliver all of my kids.
That said, I think it is more about finding someone you click with, aren't afraid to ask ANY kind question to, and someone that respects your wishes. IMO its more about the person than their title.
Did you feel that the doctor was more educated than the midwife? I agree with you that the title shouldn't matter but DH seems to think they got their degree through some phony school and I'm going to get hurt.

MW have their masters in nursing, if that helps your DH feel better

Brandyjean30 · October 2011

Discordia1030:
Even though I'm more then likely having a rcs, I'll be using a MW. The practice works with rotating doctors at the hospital who perform any actions the MWs aren't allowed to, such as a c/s. The MW will stay by my side the whole time during the surgery, which is more what I want. If I have a rcs, I'll met the OB ahead of time and thats good enough for me. I know the MW will observe and have my best interests at heart, I don't need to have spent a lot of time with the OB in order to feel comfortable with them performing the surgery. I've researched the hospitalists who they work with and would be fine with any of them.
I went to a large OB office last time and felt jostled around by everyone and never was truly comfortable with any of the doctors. I ended up getting the OB I liked the most when I went into labor, but I knew that was pure luck. When we got rushed to the o/r, I only knew 3 people in the room: DH, the OB and the anesthesiologist. It was terrifying and I wish I had someone who knew what exactly was going on sitting next to me, talking me through it. DH did what he could, but it wasn't the same.

This helps a lot. This is the experience I'm wanting. I hope DH will come around and see that me and the cub will be ok

emberlee3 · October 2011

I am going to the same practice I went to for DS. There are both OBs and midwives. I saw both for prenatal visits. If you are uncomplicated and deliver M-F 8-5, a midwife delivers you. If it's evening, night or weekend, it's the OB on-call. I had DS on a Saturday morning. I had discussed my preferences ahead of time, so it was on my chart. Everything went well.

rissa_n · October 2011

I had a midwife with my first pg, and loved the experience. Then I moved to a different city where midwives are hard to find, and the midwife practice I saw during my 2nd pg (m/c) aren't part of the insurance plan I have since switching jobs. So, I'm going with my sister's OB practice, she recommended them highly so I'm comfortable with it even though I really wanted to use a midwife again.

tulipblossom · October 2011

Lurking from June 2011 but wanted to let yo know with my LO I went to a practice that used both MWs and OBs and I saw one of each during my prenatal care. They were both great people and if I had to do it all over again I would not do anything differently. Also the hospital I delivered at 70% of their births are supervised by midwives and the midwife who "caught" my baby was only there for the last 15 minuets or so of pushing before my LO came into the world most of my pushing was done with my nurse. If you think a midwife will be best for you then go with your gut I am sure your DH will come around to it. Midwives are still medical professionals they just can't preform C Sections

OO cupcakes OO · October 2011

sam19:
Also, I think you should schedule an appointment with a midwife if that is what you want just to discuss what your expectations and what there expectations and normal practices are. Take your husband along so he can ask his own questions and voice his concerns.

This. That's great advice! Asking questions and feeling comfortable is so important.

lysl23 · October 2011

Brandyjean30:
lysl23:
With my first, I wanted to avoid unnecessary interventions so I had a midwife my whole pregnancy... until I relocated states at 8 mos pregnant. I obv. didn't have time to to be picky so I went with a practice that was recommended to me and whichever doctor they booked me with. He turned out to be amazing and completely changed my view of doctors and I hope he can deliver all of my kids.
That said, I think it is more about finding someone you click with, aren't afraid to ask ANY kind question to, and someone that respects your wishes. IMO its more about the person than their title.
Did you feel that the doctor was more educated than the midwife? I agree with you that the title shouldn't matter but DH seems to think they got their degree through some phony school and I'm going to get hurt.

This particular doctor is more educated than the midwife I had. He picked up on my low platelets in my first appt, something that the midwife had never even mentioned to me during the whole 8 mos. I saw her. And it actually turned out to be a significant issue in the end and I'm glad that I was aware of it before being checked into the hospital or it probably would have been a very scary experience instead of a great one.

This happened to be my situation but as a general rule of thumb I do feel that midwives are educated and can do a great job. As soon as there is a complication however, you will be passed on to an OB. I was OK with that when I had a midwife and the way my situation went, I would have had a random OB.

DawnLilly · October 2011

i'll be seeing a midwife. i don't see her until my ninth weeks but she called a few days ago just to make sure i was still doing okay and if i had any questions or concerns. she wanted to make sure that i knew that even though we havent officially met yet that she's still available to me night or day should i need anything. let your husband know that shes also an md and that i will be giving birth in a hospital but there is a tub there if i choose to use it. they're not all new agey and quacky. most of them are very intelligent, educated women who feel that our bodies are already perfected biologically and physically to do this so why mess with so much and create more risks.

chusum · October 2011

As awesome as a MW really sounds, I just have some medical stuff that I'd rather have my OB handle. I really like the practice I see. My OB & nurses have been great and I'd hate to switch now.

Brandyjean30 · October 2011

Thank You ladies this helps a lot! I'm calling this morning to make an appointment with the midwife. I'm having DH make a list of questions that he has for her and hopefully we can make a decision from there. I also discovered that the MWs are in the same practice as the OB I was going to see. I'm just going to roll with it and see what happens. Thank you again!

ReTRoRenegade07 · October 2011

My hubby was actually the one who suggested the MW, I assumed he would be pro MD. I'm low risk and this our first, so we're basically clueless on personal experiences. He talked to some women he works with and the majority of them who have had a MD for one birth and a MW for the other suggested that I see a MW. They said the experience for them was much better than their experiences with the MDs.

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