Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
NicoleD0516
member
Re: It's time for FFFC!
My confession is that I have been stalking my registry.... daily (okay, sometimes a few times a day). My shower is tonight and I've been trying to figure out what I'll need to get after the shower. The flame worthy part is that I had created a spreadsheet, for our budgeting reasons, to prioritize the items I would want to buy after and prioritized them all.
Okay, now that I've shown you my neurotic type A side. It's your turn!
Cooper: 11/20/11
Julian: EDD 8/1/16
PCOS & Endo. w/ DOR
Hehehehe, I totally did that when we got married 4 years ago! Haven't gotten far enough along to register yet.
My confession: I really am excited to tell my in-laws that I'm pregnant when they come visit today. But they stay for too long (like until next Wednesday) and expect way too much entertaining when they visit so I'm equally planning to use pregnancy as an excuse to go take a nap or otherwise avoid my MIL when she's getting on my nerves.
Haha, I did that for our wedding, too -- especially the after-wedding prioritized spreadsheet! (Including cost estimates based on the 10% completion bonus vs not, if we decided to wait to buy something, haha)
I'm proud of it, rather than otherwise, though.
My confession: We're having DH's birthday party this weekend, the house is a mess, and I'm just plain not motivated to clean it.
♥ Married since June 2009 ♥
TW: Living children & Losses:
Pregnant after 4 losses via IVF/FET with daughter "Gamma" (EDD Oct 2, 2019)
Don't be fooled, I color coded the items by priority, Red = priority/we're buying. Orange= we can likely get away with it in the beginning but will need later. Green = it's just a want. Then I totaled the entire thing, totaled the red items, orange, etc.. I'm kinda lame.
I stalked my wedding registry a few years ago too! Not to this extent though.
You'll know when it's time to REALLY get going on the cleaning! The pending deadline will get ya going.
Cooper: 11/20/11
Julian: EDD 8/1/16
PCOS & Endo. w/ DOR
TTC #2 for a million years: SA normal, CD 23 bloodwork shows nothing amiss, ovulation detected. Next step: ? maybe CD3 bloodwork to check eggs? All out of pocket, so limited IF tests/treatments.
I could have written most of this myself. You are not alone sister!
You should have called me, we could have had a huge pity party together. I cried for about an hour over my hair.
I totally should have! What a sad bunch we were last night. Haha!
I posted a status on FB basically thanking my DH for how much work he does with LO. One of my BFF posted something about "LO is 1/2 his so is 1/2 the work" and that basically I shouldn't thank him for doing his duty. It pissed me off. A lot. I just wanted to show my appreciation and it feels like she took that away. *sigh*
This irks me and I hate it when people do that. I am sorry you feel like she took it away.. but I can tell you, she can't take it.. you own it, and I commend you for being grateful for your DH. It is a rare commodity, and I am sure he is glad that you do.
Thank you! I think my feelings have more to do with this particular friend in general, we've been really close friends for a long time and lately not so much. It's sad.