- Pregnancy
- Baby & Toddler
- Parents
- Getting Pregnant
- Baby Names
- Product Reviews
-
Registry
- Community
-
More
Want a personalized experience?
Download the free app
2nd Trimester
Help out a first time mom: What to expect after labor?
I keep learning new things from a friend whose just had her first... what are some things 2nd time moms can share that 1st time mom's don't always know till the time comes? For instance, in all my reading, I didn't know you had postnatal bleeding for 2-3 weeks! Can you exercise soon (meaning a week or so) after labor? What else are we in store for that isn't always public knowledge or is more of "girlfriend to girlfriend" talk?
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Help out a first time mom: What to expect after labor?
Just some random things from my own personal experience...
1. I bled for 5-6 weeks after birth. It was like a period that was medium flow.
2. The first couple of days during breastfeeding, it causes your uterus to contract back to regular size and it hurt bad. My nips didn't hurt, but my uterus was in pain!
3. The first 2 weeks after birth, I would wake up completely drenched in sweat in the middle of the night. Lovely hormones!
4. The hormones made me cry the first 2-3 weeks after delivery.
5. My boobs were rock hard when my milk came in. I didn't get a single stretch mark the entire pregnancy, but my boobs were covered in them when my milk came in. Thankfully, the stretchies completely faded by 4 months post partum.
Now I'm not here to give you horror stories because a lot of moms will love to give that stuff out but I will say that yes, there are a few weeks of bleeding pp. I bled right up to my 6th week appointment. It will be very heavy in the beginning so stock up on the most absorbent pad out there. I recommend the extra long overnight pads with wings....the bigger, more absorbent the better. You may want to get a small pack of those puppy pee pads from the pet store to sleep on. I bled a lot in the beginning and they saved me on laundry.
Exercising....it depends on how your birth went. If you have stitches, you might be a little more prone to taking it easy. When I say exercising, that's not out going to the gym...that's taking a slow walk through the neighborhood and back.
I was pretty sore for the first week or so. My back and stomach muscles were beat up from the pushing. I also had stitches and my bottom hurt...I was using a donut pillow to sit on. Other women out there heal wonderfully and they will tell you that they were out and about pushing the baby for a walk when they just got out of the hospital....I was in no mood to do that. So once again, take it day by day and see how your body reacts.
Agree with namcgee. I personally had bleeding for the entire 6 weeks, although really light for the last two weeks. You aren't allowed to excercise until you get permission from your Dr. nor will you want to. You have to feed your child every 1-3 hours, that leave little time for sleeping, so you will be exhausted and not want to work out. Maybe a nice walk around the block if the weather is nice.
Leaky boobs, another one no one ever told me about. Oh and this may not be everyone but I was a weepy hormonal mess for a few weeks until more hormones balanced out. Oh and loosing your hair, my hair was everywhere for about 6 months. It doesn't shed much during pregnancy, giving you nice thick hair, but once baby comes....it all starts to fall out, a lot.
The bleeding sucks but remember you haven't had a period for 9 months and if you EBF, you can go another 9 months without a period (but with DS#1 I only got 2 months before starting again). There may be some soreness, especially if you tear. But it is not too bad. I never had to use painkillers, but the peri-bottle is a lifesaver after going to the bathroom.
About exercise, you can probably do some light walking, with baby in a carrier or stroller, but definently nothing strenuous until after you see you OB or midwife for your follow-up at 6 weeks.
Not only will you bleed AT LEAST 2-3 weeks, it will be heavier than you've ever bled for the first few days. Buy the most abosorbent pads you can. Fortunately, they can be very absorbent but still thin these days!
The thing that surprised me most was how out of shape I felt. We went for a 10 minute walk around the block when DS was 4-5 days old and I seriously thought I wouldn't make it back home.
Thank you, I should have been more specific, when I said work out I did mean walking... except for the whole due in the dead of winter and walking in the snow doesn't sound appealing...
These are great!! Thank you!! I know everyone is different, so I just wanted to know what some of your experiences were (especially if you had read or heard "this should take place week X" and it happened for you week Y and Z).
For me (same as other PPs) I didn't know:
1. You would bleed so much and for so long. Though I've been told that I didn't bleed much. To me it was a lot of blood. I think I bled for like 2 weeks pretty heavy then another week after that like a normal period, then some spotting. I guess not too bad but I really wasn't prepared for the heavy bleeding in the very beginning.
2. Also if you BF you have to make sure you are wearing a nice thick pad while you BF your baby in the beginning because the BFing causes your uterus to contract and you "gush" blood while you BF especially in the very beginning.
3. I was not prepared for how much milk I would leak when my milk came in either. For me it happened like the 3rd night and I was standing up with just a tshirt and shorts on, changing my DD in the middle of the night. I bent down to change her diaper and remember freaking out because I was leaking milk everywhere! It was all over the bed, some on her, on my shirt and a little puddle on the floor. After that I never went to bed without a nursing bra on and nursing pads!
4. I didn't expect the REALLY bad back pain I would get from so much bending over after birth. You have to bend over to change the baby all the time, and you bend over to do a bunch of other stuff and BF too. This time around I will be much more careful about not bending over so much so I don't get the terrible back pain I got the first time.
5. I wasn't prepared for how often I had to BF my baby. I knew I would have to BF her every few hours, but I really felt like DD was eating like every hour or two in the beginning, which was hard, but it got MUCH better quickly.
6. I wasn't prepared for how protective I would be of the baby and how much of a "germaphobe" I would become especially in the very beginning when the baby was so tiny. I nearly KILLED my STUPID SIL for bringing over her 5 year old daughter with pink eye to our house to hold the baby. I won't even go into this because I will want to kill her again.
7. I wasn't too hormonal after birth and I had a really good recovery but I did lose it and sob a few times because I thought the baby wasn't eating enough and I had no idea how to measure how much milk I was giving her because I was BFing. Obviously it was fine
And I don't really consider those to be "horror" stories but just things that you have to live through yourself to really understand them.
http://balletandbabies.blogspot.com
One thing I wish people would have warned me about is that once your period starts again it can be a LOT different from before. It doesn't happen to everyone, but mine got a ton heavier and I get a lot more cramping than I did before pregnancy.
I had DS vaginally so don't know if that makes a difference on bleeding or not but I believe I had 2 or 3 stitches and I didn't have any pain - but the peri-bottle was nice. It did sting a little bit to pee but nothing bad - and my first poop after delivery was a breeze - easier and better than while I was pregnant! I bled for about 3 weeks I think - if that long and it wasn't very heavy at all - I wore the hospital pads for about 3 days then switched to panti-liners so not everyone bleeds super heavy but definitely have a few different aborbency options so you aren't bleeding through just in case.
And the boob leakage - I didn't have to wear breast pads until I was in Walmart and another baby started to cry and I began to leak - it was SO embrassing! After that I wore them constantly.
My son was born on a Tuesday and we came home Wednesday afternoon and Friday I was out and about - we had his newborn appointment, I bought my mother charm (my mom stayed in the car with the baby) and I ran into the local pharmacy to print pictures for the baby announcement. It felt great to get out and be in public again but I get stir crazy easy.
That's all I can think about now, but just remember everyone is different, and every pregnancy is different just like every labor and delivery is. It's also about personal comfort, pain tolerance, etc. With this baby being due in flu season, I feel like I won't be out and about as much, but I have a son that goes to preschool every day so I will be doing drop off, etc. like usual and he gets a spring break just 3 weeks after the baby is due so we will be doing some fun stuff as a family, so we will be out some - I just plan on wearing the baby and keeping him covered so nobody gets ideas to touch my newborn with their germy little hands!
A lot of people bleed longer than 2-3 weeks. I think 4-6 is closer to the average and it was 7 weeks for me. You probably shouldn't do full on exercise right away and depending on how your birth went you might not want to. Walks around the neighborhood are fine but you should wait 6 weeks to do more than that. I had a fast, easy labor and a quick recovery but I still got tired easily just taking DS for walks. I also overdid it a little bit with housework, cooking, and errands and I almost passed out in Wal-Mart one day. So my advice is to take it easy for a few weeks, even if you think you feel great.
ETA: I totally agree with the back pain thing. It never even occurred to me how weak my stomach muscles would be once DS was out and it takes things a while to tighten back up. Not having that core support really makes a difference in how much basic activities tire you out.
med-free birth x2, breastfeeding, baby wearing SAHM
My BFP Chart
Ditto a lot of what has been said (cramping while breastfeeding, leaking, bleeding - I bled for about 5 weeks PP - peri bottle with warm water, etc.). Also, invest in some big underwear. Sounds silly, but you will be wearing so much padding for awhile that you want a lot of support. I remember in our childbirth class they showed us the mesh underwear that they put on moms after delivery and we laughed because it was HUGE. But it turned out to the be the best thing ever.
Try to stay off your feet for a few days - I remember going to the grocery store with DH a few days after delivery and I had to go back and wait in the car after a while because it was painful to stand for so long. But maybe a week or so after delivery I started to take walks around the block.
When you do start really exercising again (especially if you run), wear a pad. There will be some bladder leakage. Fun stuff!
1. My friend blead past her 6 week checkup. I only bleed for a couple of weeks - and only the first 2 days were really heavy. It was pretty light after that and not bothersome at all. No tampons allowed during this time.
2. They say if you are doing it right that BFing does not hurt. Not true -- it hurt like hell whenever he initially latched on. This was for a few weeks with me. Not the whole nursing session -- just when he latched. Your nipples just need to get used to it.
3. Excerise was not on my mind. But I don't think you are supposed to be excersing until you are healed -- 6 weeks. No sex either.
4. Your whole body may be sore for a couple of days PP. Labor takes a lot out of you.
5. Your stomach does not go back to normal right away. DH was so surprised to find that I still had a very pregnant belly the day after DS was born... LOL.
6. In the beginning the baby does not just wake up to eat in the middle of the night. They just wake up.... and don't go back to sleep
7. Your uterus contracts while nursing or pumping.. helping it to shrink back to size faser. It hurts.
I will edit as I think of more...
2-3 weeks! Only if you're really lucky! Mine was more like 5-6.
On the exercising I will tell you what my husband (a surgeon) and my OB told me. DON'T DO IT. They both made me wait at least 6-8 weeks, When you push the baby out your pelvic floor opens up and a lot of other important parts get pushed down below your pelvic floor that shouldn't be down there. If you take it easy those things will come back up on their own. If you exercise, use your stomach muscles a lot, strain a bunch, etc before everything goes back to where it should be, you risk peeing your pants (more than you would otherwise) for the rest of your life.
Here is a good site for fun(ny) facts and observations:
https://www.pregnantchicken.com/pregnant-chicken-blog/2010/9/23/happily-after-giving-birth-10-things-they-dont-tell-you.html
I think someone already mentioned the night sweats. That was the one thing that i felt totally unprepared for. Waking up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat is gross.
You need to set aside a good 10 minutes to use the bathroom. All of the rinsing, witch hazel, dermoplast spray, pads, ice packs, etc make a simple pee trip quite an ordeal.
If you have stairs in your house it might be difficult to get up and down. It's possible, but it just might take a while longer than you're used to.
If you feel good enough to get out of the house that's great, but there's a chance you won't. I didn't feel like leaving the house for 2 weeks and poor DH got sent out to the store at least once a day to get all the things I thought we'd have time to buy after we got home from the hospital.
Buy a breast pump before the baby arrives. Even if it's a cheap manual one until you get the hang of a breastfeeding/pumping routine. You may have the best intentions when it comes to breastfeeding but things don't always go according to plan. And when your milk comes in your boobs feel like they will literally explode and you'll need something to relieve the pressure.
I'll be a first timer, too and the pro mommies have given some great advice!
My mom always tells first time moms that when the baby is sleeping, you might feel the urge to do a million household chores (dishes, ironing, laundry, cleaning) but sleep when the baby sleeps as much as you can. You need to rest so when baby is awake and needs you, you aren't a total zombie.
HEMMOROIDS!!! They suck sooooooooo bad if you get them. I feel it was kind of my fault b/c I it felt like I really really had to (poop) and dumb me tried to while I was pushing.......................so i got really really bad hemorroids. I think they hurt worse than the labor.
Yes you bleed after. I bleed for about 5 weeks.
Hormones were the worst i cried over everything.
I would wake up drenched in sweat for a couple of months after it was very nasty,
My hair fell out so much that i was scared to brush it or run my fingers through it.
If you breast feed then be ware your nipples might hurt but your uterus will hurt from contracting back to its normal size. Wear nursing pads so if you do leak you wont look like you are from the outside. Also meet with a lactation consultant. The hospital normally has one on staff. some nurses have special training. My nurse ended up being the lactation consultant. Take care of your ladies. I ended up getting Mastitis not fun. Look it up....So you are prepared if you start to show symptoms you can catch it before you end up in the hospital like i did.
sleep when the baby sleeps you wont get much the first few months. If your house is messy who cares. dont be afraid to ask for help.
I dont want to scare anyone but just keep in mind weird things happen.
I wasn't prepared for the pain of breastfeeding. It hurts. And your ute will contract and that hurts like hell.
I wasn't prepared for the amount of swelling I would have down there or the sitz baths I would have to take. Nor was I prepared for the stitches from my episitomomy. They itch like a mofo and the only thing you can do is tolerate it.
Pooping hurts. You'll probably get hemroids from pushing during delievery. Be prepared with colace and drink tons of fluids. Your stomach won't be right for a few months. You go from eating like you are nine months pregnant to not wanting food at all.
I also had no idea how much of a mama bear I would turn into. I found myself pretty hormonal at times.
Make a pregnancy ticker
I just wanted to add a couple of things that I did not notice being posted.
1. The most awesome thing ever in the few days after delivery is a frozen diaper. Get a newborn size diaper wet and stick it in the freezer. When your lady parts hurt, stick the diaper between you and your underwear. It feels so...freaking...good! And it helps withe the PP bleeding.
2. A possibility is losing control of your bladder for a while. I had a long labor (18hours) and the pressure on the muscle that contols the bladder caused me to lose control of my urine. I would literally stand up, walk to the bathroom, pull down my pants, and already be peeing before I could sit down on the toilet. The nurse was REALLY unhelpful and I freaked out that I would have to wear adult diapers the rest of my life. My lovely obgyn calmed me down and let me know it was very common and it would slowly come back. Kegels are your friend. Start doing them now and do them everyday. I had to wear adult diapers for a few weeks before I could finally switch to pads and then panty liners. I still pee when I sneeze and it pissse me off! (no pun intended!) Just a warning, not a horror story, just don't freak out if it happens to you!
Best advice ever. Sounds super silly, feels like heaven. Also before you leave the hospital take EVERYTHING you can. All the pads and cold packs they put in your room, take with you. You'll feel like you're cleaning them out but remember whether or not you use them during your stay, you're still getting charged for them. The week after I got home I was thankful for the cold pack pads I brought from the hospital.
I would also say don't go crazy stocking up on nursing pads because you may not even need them. I had so many and literally used maybe 5 because my milk never came roaring in. I only leaked if I hadn't nursed DD from one side for more than a few hours.
I had awful night sweats starting the night after DS was born. I woke up and paged the nurse the first night because I thought I was having a heart attack-LOL!
I had a c-section and the immobility I experienced afterwards was the hardest. It was hard to sit up or roll over in bed....or really to even lie down in anything other than the hospital bed the first couple nights.
I bled for only 2 weeks, and at the end it turns yellowish-totally freaked me out but apparently it's totally normal.
I could walk 15 minutes a week after having LO. I was running by 6 weeks pp.
Have lots of snacks you can eat with one hand like muffins, bananas, apples, and granola bars. You'll want to snack during your night feedings because BFing takes a lot out of you.
Have lots of nipple cream and nursing pads...you'll need them!
I also bled for at least 6 weeks.
I was in the hospital for 4 days (due to DS jaundice and my pelvic bone problems) and for a few days my legs and feet were so much more swollen then any time during pregnancy.
If you are pumping at all using an electric pump, remember the fact about breastfeeding causes uterine contractions. I had my pump turned up too high and since my child was huge my body was working over time to get it go back to normal. I ended up in the hospial a week after DS was born because I was practically paralyzed from the pain of the contractions and had no idea why.
Your nipples will bleed. It wont hurt the baby if it gets blood in the milk.
The first few days are overwhelming. Cry if you need to. My mom didn't tell me until later that she randomly started crying for no reason because so much had just gone on. I thought there was something wrong with me and it was almost painful to hold back the tears when all I needed to do was cry for no reason.
You will lose hair. I also lost hair on my arms and legs. yay bonus of not having to shave as much for a few weeks!
Take your peri bottle home with you. It was a lifesaver. Even if I wanted to have sex with DH there was nothing happening for the first 1-2 weeks because I was swollen shut down there. I was shocked just how swollen I was. (besides, there is a chance you won't feel like having sex for the 6 weeks or longer.)
My hospital had frozen some pads to use (instead of the diaper that was mentioned) and it was heaven.
And, until you have your first poop after baby, you will have A LOT of gas. I told DH that next baby we have the only guest we will have are ones I would feel comfortable whipping a boob out in front of or farting in front of. Holding it in hurt so much.
Happy Easter
My Blog
This is my biggest tip. Continue to take the stool softeners after you get home!!! My first poop was easy because of the stool softeners. My second poop was absolute torture! I was screaming in pain.
Also, if you plan to breastfeed, stick with it. Just make yourself a comfortable nest in your home with remote and food handy, and just nurse nurse nurse all day long. As the baby gets older, he/she will nurse less frequently.
Remember that each phase will not last forever. I seriously wondered if my daughter would EVER sleep through the night. She did. I wondered if I would EVER get my boobs back as my own posession. I did. I wondered if I would EVER get into a routine. We did. Just be patient and give you, your baby, and your household time to adjust. It will happen in due time.
Don't be too proud to accept help. If people want to cook for you, clean for you, come help you care for the baby while you sleep, take them up on it. Eventually they will stop offering, and you will wish they were around again. In my case, we didn't have any help at all, and boy do I wish we had!
You'll do fine. Just relax and let things happen in their own timing. Don't worry too much about "Am I doing this right?!!" "Is my baby normal?!?!?" You just figure it out after awhile. You will make mistakes, but just forgive yourself and move on.
A good parent is not perfect, but one who just loves their kid and does the best they can.
I'm a first time mom, too, so reading this thread really helped out a lot! Thanks for all the insight, ladies!
I just wanted to comment on this losing your hair business, which I've heard a bit about before... I happened to read an article containing a snippet about this very thing just yesterday that made me feel a bit more comfortable about losing hair. Supposedly, it only seems like you're losing a ton because you've kind of had "extra" hair during pregnancy. Lol. Basically it's just your hair's way of returning to it's normal growing and shedding cycle. Everyone around me has made it sound like I'll go bald or something, so reading the article brought me a bit of comfort. Hopefully it may set some of you at ease, too
https://shine.yahoo.com/channel/health/the-truth-about-your-body-after-baby-2575341/