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Pregnant after 35
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Was it hard for you to decide?

indy_chicindy_chic member
in Pregnant after 35

Congrats to all u 35yrs.+ moms to be's!!

After having an awesome pregnancy (delivered just before my 35th bday) and an OK C-section experience and a happy, healthy baby girl (1st born), I've been thinking a lot about having another baby.

Once out of the hospital, I kept telling myself I wouldn't do it again.  Although the pain at the time seemed intolerable and the feeling that my insides were falling out was horrible, looking back now, I forget LOL

We all know they say that certain risks increase after 35.  They also advise that you shouldn't get pregnant after csection for at least 6-9 months.  This would leave me 36, close to 37 when/if I planned for a 2nd baby.

I know that so many moms are having children at many different ages, I'm having a hard time deciding now.  Maybe in 3+ months it'll be more clear.

 




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Re: Was it hard for you to decide?

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    benoitfanbenoitfan member
    Nope.  I knew as soon as I saw my little man that I wanted one more.  Believe me I totally understand about the pain being a deterrent.  My DS was posterior, my back labour was out of this world painful, I had horrible tearing and broke my tailbone pushing my 9lber out.  It's been 22 months and I still have chronic tailbone pain...despite all this, I can't wait to meet number 2.  I will admit, I am terrified of delivery and am hoping my OB will agree to do a c/s because of the difficulties and chronic pain that resulted from the birth of my DS.
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    Jerzee1974Jerzee1974

    Honestly I am still in the first stage of - HE!! no i'm done after lil boogs shows up in December.

    Taking the chance and having one was a challenge enough for me.  And I have no clue what to expect from labor and delivery.

    However, I think I will be content with this one - I still have a grandson to help raise, nieces and nephews coming out the wazoo and 2 older step kids that seem to need more these days than before.

    Good luck on your decision though - we all make the choices that are best for us individually

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    racampbell1racampbell1
    It was hard for us. We were both 37 when DD was born and worried about the risk if we had another one given our ages.  We were so lucky that she is 100% healthy and fretted that it might not be that way the next time.  But I just couldn't shake the feeling that our family wasn't complete and DH agreed.  We waited until DD was 14 months old to TTC.  One year and two losses later, we are pg again with what we hope will be our miracle baby.  I would never volunteer for the heartbreak of losing a baby again, but it did cement my feelings that I really wanted another one.  I will be 39 when I deliver this time.  I think you just have to search your heart and do what is best for your family.  You can have a wonderful and complete family with 1 kiddo, 2, 3 or 7, it just depends on what feels right.  Give yourself a little more time and search your heart and I think the answer will come to you.  BTW, one of my friends is 43 and delivering #2 next week, perfectly healthy :)  I'm guessing you have some time to make your decision! 
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    YaraCYaraC

    After I had my daughter, one of the first things I told my DH was that there was no way I was ever doing that again. Fast forward 6 months and all of that was forgotten in the bliss of having the most adorable daughter in the world.

    Age was not a factor in our decision to have another. You take a risk having a child at any age. Most children with DS are born to women under 35 (they have the most children). Even if the risks are slightly higher as your good older the odds are overwhelmingly in your favor that you will have a healthy baby. No risk, no reward. 

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    greengirl0909greengirl0909 member
    I've always wanted a big family, so it wasn't hard for me to decide.  Now that it's happening, I do worry if I'm rushing LO in growing up (he'll be almost 2 when our second is born) But, too late now!
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    718gemini718gemini member
    Well, I'm still pregnant with my first, but...  at this stage, at least, we are planning on having one more.  I'm 36 now, and if things work out according to plan, I'll be 38 or 39 when I have the next baby.  Ideally I'd like to wait until the first baby is 2 before I start TTC, but in reality it might be closer to 1 1/2 years- I don't know if it will be as easy to get pregnant the next time around.  With that one exception, I'm not factoring my age into my decision to have another child.
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    lovelife721972lovelife721972

    My DD is 12yrs old now and I thought for sure I was never going to do it again. The c section was horrible and it took me 3 mos to heal from it after a horrible infection. I even became distant with my daughter after she was born. I was soooo depressed.

    This baby was planned and I am really excited. I am still terrified when it comes to the c section. This pregnancy feels different to me. We are making sure I have the best doctors and that I don't re-live what happened with my daughter. I am also in a healthy loving relationship which helps so very much. Once this baby comes I am getting my tubes tied because we only want the one. We both have kids from previous marriages. My daughter is so excited but hoping for a sister. His son is an adult and knows nothing about the baby. We know he won't care but he will find out through other family.

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