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Hawaii Babies
redshoegirl
member
need discipline help!
redshoegirl
member
Will and Dash know they're not supposed to play in the kitchen. They understand what "out of the kitchen", "don't touch" and "away from the stove" all mean. Naturally this means the kitchen is the best place in the world to play, because it's fun to watch the veins in mama's forehead bulge when one boy runs to the stove and the other starts trying to dismantle the dishwasher.
I've been coping just by trying to be extra vigilant and reinforcing the "out of the kitchen" message every time I can, but after this morning I know that's not cutting it. They were - yet again - messing around in the kitchen, and I was - yet again - trying to herd them out.
I was moving Dash away from the dishwasher, turned around and saw Will at the stove. But instead of just whacking it like he usually does, he reached up and started turning the burners on. Obviously, this problem has turned into a major safety issue!
I can't physically block off the kitchen because of the house's floorplan.
I can't put on those stove knob covers because the stove design won't allow it, and I'm not allowed to attach a different kind of cover to the stove with adhesives.
I can't use this to block the knobs/burners because the way our stove and kitchen are designed, it would be very easy for a toddler to simply reach around it.
I have tried every discipline tactic I can think of to discourage the boys from messing with the appliances, and they just don't care. I know that distraction/redirection is often suggested in parenting books, but my kids must be the exception to the rule. They are EXTREMELY focused if they want to do something, and the shiniest, most exciting toy in the world will simply not tempt them if they'd rather assault the stove.
I've considered getting them a little toy stove of their own to see if that would be distracting enough, but this house is TINY and I can't see where we could put it.
I'm getting desperate! Does anyone have any ideas?
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Re: need discipline help!
We do this too - but they're just not interested for more than a few seconds.
They want to play with the things that are out of bounds, not the ones they're allowed to play with.
It also doesn't help that they've figured out how to work as a team (e.g., Dash will run over and start trying to pull apart the dishwasher, and Will waits until I'm distracted to go for the stove). I don't know how to handle that.
Do you find that A likes his toy stove, or is he a bit meh about it? I'm trying to figure out if there's any way I can squeeze one in somewhere...it's the only thing I can think of that I haven't tried that might work.
Twins are clever, for sure. My nieces had their own secret language and made a pact to refuse to speak to anyone other than each other for their entire preschool experience. They kept it up, too!
We don't have a full-sized play stove. It's just a small wooden one that sits on the floor -- just the burners and the knobs, no oven. I got it second-hand, so I don't know the brand. He plays with it a lot, especially now that I got him kid-sized tin pots and pans and utensils. I also give him old creamer jugs and spice containers. He's still not too good about playing on his own away from me for long, so although he likes it, he still gravitates toward me when I'm in the kitchen.
You can try the play kitchen but my experience has been that toddlers want to what YOU'RE doing, not some toy/play version of it!
What about something like this?
https://babies-kids.pricegrabber.com/playpens-playards/p/1016/
To either contain them nearby where you can see them OR use it open to block your kitchen? We have something similar that we stretch across our 10 ft. opening between the kitchen/dining room and living room to keep the pugs out of the living room at night (Regina will pee on the carpet if we don't).
We could also use it to keep Libby out of the kitchen if we needed that....
We're lucky at our new house because our stove/oven has a built-in, digital lock that prevents the gas from turning on even if the knobs are turned. We press and hold a button for 5 seconds and it locks off the gas. VERY handy with a curious LO around!
I did buy her some alphabet magnets for the fridge to occupy her when we're in the kitchen. She also has these gel clings that she can stick on the fridge or glass back door which also occupies her while we're in the kitchen. Some days, I do put her in her high chair with crayons/paper and let her doodle while I cook.
I've been wanting to make her some sensory toys and these could definitely be an option for distraction, especially if they only get to have them during kitchen/cooking time, KWIM?
https://pinterest.com/pin/261176775/
Other ideas are getting them involved with kitchen duties...such as stirring, pouring, etc. Not an option each and every time, I know, but even some of the time might fulfill their needs to "help." Libby loves to "help" and we'll give her plastic storage containers to match with lids, wooden spoons and pot to "stir." etc. Like I said she really wants to have whatever it is we have...so if I'm stirring a pot on the stove, I give her a smaller pot and spoon to stir on the floor (empty).
Since you have TWO to manage while cooking seems to me that high chair time with some sort of activity might be your best bet for now....in a couple of months you can try again with the "rules" in the kitchen and see how they do.
TTC/PG Blog | Mommy Blog
Here's a cool way to have the kiddies help you with cooking while containing the mess of it all:
https://pinterest.com/pin/257744318/
TTC/PG Blog | Mommy Blog
Thanks for the ideas, Lori! The real problem is that they're not just messing around in the kitchen when I'm cooking. It's all.the.time.
It's not just because I'm in there or am doing interesting stuff like cooking. I could be down the hall in their playroom, trying to distract them with fun toys or activities, and they will still tear off to the kitchen to try to get at the stove and dishwasher.
It's so weird, because it seems like the only time other people have this issue is when they're in the kitchen, but my guys don't care whether I'm in there or not. Maybe just trying to block it off with that first link you posted is the best idea?
life in oz
Yeah, seems to me this would be the best and safest bet. The nice thing about those play yard type gates is you can use them to block off other stuff too, like a Christmas Tree or Fireplace or even use it to contain them in a "safe" area like their playroom (cannot remember if you have one at your new place). I'd get one and just have it up to block the kitchen from them completely. Then, I'd let them come in WITH you from time to time so they'll eventually learn how you wish for them to behave in it. It's a process! Hang in there mama!
TTC/PG Blog | Mommy Blog
I think this is a great idea, thank you! I hadn't even considered the play yard type gate, just a regular baby gate (which of course wouldn't fit). And I like the idea of bringing them in with me so they get the hang of how to behave, and of what a kitchen is for (i.e., cooking - and I can get them to help me by stirring fruit salad or something). Thanks again!
life in oz
TTC/PG Blog | Mommy Blog
I'm probably way late here, but just wanted to chime in and say that we also use a play yard gate and we zig-zag span it across the area between our living room and kitchen and it works like a charm. The only thing is that we always have to step over it to get to the kitchen ourselves, which is usually ok but sometimes when do you it while you're in a rush, you bang your leg on it and it can hurt =P It's like doing hurdles in your house