TTC After a Loss 6 Months+

I just need a place to vent (LONG)

Today has just all around been a bad day.

First and foremost my #1 pet peeve is people on FB and IRL constantly complaining about how terrible their life is because their fighting with there bf, have to work late, or the big one complaints about being a mom or there children.  Sometimes it takes everything in me not to tell them that they have no idea what terrible is and to suck it up and get over it.

Second, DH called me while I was filling up the sink to do dishes today.  I got distracted by the call and didn't turn off the sink.  Came back and my kitchen looked like a lake. I hear water running and I go down to the basement and see the water has run under the fridge and counters and its now raining into my basement and water is everywhere.

Third I started having bad headaches, dizziness and pain on my left side and back.  I called my Dr. and she said to come in to the office right away.  The only location open was the one 45 mins away.  So my mom dropped everything to drive me up there and the Dr. does and u/s and just tells me theres no sign of a rupture or internal bleeding and she has no idea why I'm in pain.

Then I get home and my husbands cousin's wife announces on FB shes having a little girl.  This time next month I should be giving birth to our little girl and instead I'm sitting here in pain and waiting to have my 4th miscarriage. 

Ugh I'm sorry this is so long and that I'm being a whiny baby but I'm just over everything today.  All I wanna do is curl up in my bed, cry until I fall asleep and hope it all just some how miraculously gets better when I wake up.

"Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart"

Our TTC Journey

BabyFetus Ticker

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I'm a mom to my 4 angel babies who were taken from us much to soon!
BFP#1 on 09/29/09 and EP discovered/Left Tube lost on 10/19/09 EDD 06/12/10
BFP# 2 on 03/21/2010 EDD 11/30/10 Natural M/C on 3/27/10
BFP# 3 on 02/14/2011 EDD 10/28/11 Missed M/C discovered 4/19/11 and D&C 4/21/11 On 5/6/11 we found out our Oct Angel was a beautiful little girl <3
IVF#1=BFP#4 on 8/31/11 EDD 5/12/12 EP discovered and MTX shot given 9/14/ & 9/21 M/C on 10/9/11
IVF#2 and Stims started 12/2 ER 12/16 ET 12/21 transferred two beautiful blastocysts. Please stick LO's! BFP 12/26
Benjamin Matthew Our Little Miracle Born 9/5/2012!
BFP 1/2/14 EDD 9/11/14

Re: I just need a place to vent (LONG)

  • Sending big (((hugs))) your way. I had a longtime friend who constantly complained while pg with #2, one day I had enough and commented back to her about how she should be thankful because lots of people would trade places with her. She didn't like that response and I got bombarded from her and other mom friends how I didn't understand. I deleted her and haven't looked back.

    Jenn

    image 3 IUI's all BFN

    IVF#1 BFN IVF#2 BFP, loss at 19 weeks FET#1 BFN IVF#3 BFP, m/c FET#2 BFN

    Missing our twins Zachary and Madison, lost at 19 weeks on 11/13/09, edd 4/9/10

    BFP 7/17/10, m/c 7/25/10, edd 3/25/11

    Ectopic, lost left tube 4/20/11, edd 12/6/11

    my blog

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  • I'm so sorry. That's a lot for anyone to handle. I hope tomorrow is a better day for you ((hugs)).
    Natural MCs 2/4/09, 8/22/09 & 4/7/10
    Dx with Antiphospholipid Antibody Syndrome (APS)
    BFP #4 5/14/12
    5/17/12...1st Betas- 176, P4 3.6
    5/22/12...2nd Betas- 207, P4 6.1 (MC confirmed)
  • *giant hugs* I'm so sorry you had such a terrible day.  
    Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
    Married 9/22/07, began TTC 8/10
    Diagnosed with DOR, LP defect, mild endometriosis and cysts
    BFP #1 EDD 9/10/11, natural miscarriage at 6w
    BFP #2 Medicated cycle, twin boys born 4/4/12 at 29w4d
    BFP #3 EDD 8/8/14, D&C for missed miscarriage at 8w, baby boy with triploidy
    BFP #4 June 2014 CP
  • That really is a lot all in one day. I'm so sorry! I hope tomorrow is a better day. (((hugs)))

    TTC since March 2010, BFP #1 11.09.10, ectopic, m/c 12.14.10 (10w)
    Clomid + TI=BFN, IUIs 1-6= BFN
    Application for domestic adoption submitted 4/18/12, matched 8/12/12, DD born 10/31/12


     

  • Big (((HUGS))).  I'm sorry you had such a lousy day. 

    Mom to Eliott Alexander, born sleeping at 37 weeks on 8/13/10. Most of us only dream of angels - I held one in my arms.
    BFP #2 - EDD 2/26/12 M/C 6/28/11 @ 5w2d
    BFP #3 - EDD 4/7/12 M/C 8/2/11 @ 4w2d
    Too beautiful for this earth
    BFP #4 - EDD 12/09/12, Lucille arrived 11/26/12
  • Thanks ladies. I'm sorry for being so whiny. I just didn't have anywhere or anyone else to talk to about all of that!

    "Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart"

    Our TTC Journey

    BabyFetus Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    I'm a mom to my 4 angel babies who were taken from us much to soon!
    BFP#1 on 09/29/09 and EP discovered/Left Tube lost on 10/19/09 EDD 06/12/10
    BFP# 2 on 03/21/2010 EDD 11/30/10 Natural M/C on 3/27/10
    BFP# 3 on 02/14/2011 EDD 10/28/11 Missed M/C discovered 4/19/11 and D&C 4/21/11 On 5/6/11 we found out our Oct Angel was a beautiful little girl <3
    IVF#1=BFP#4 on 8/31/11 EDD 5/12/12 EP discovered and MTX shot given 9/14/ & 9/21 M/C on 10/9/11
    IVF#2 and Stims started 12/2 ER 12/16 ET 12/21 transferred two beautiful blastocysts. Please stick LO's! BFP 12/26
    Benjamin Matthew Our Little Miracle Born 9/5/2012!
    BFP 1/2/14 EDD 9/11/14

  • *huge squishy hugs*  I'm so sorry your day was so crappy!  Blame it on being Monday!!!  And vent here anytime...we all do our fair share...atleast I do!!  I hope tomorrow is much better for you!  Sending T & P your way!
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  • BIG (HUGS)..I am so sorry that you are having to go through all of this :(

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Daisypath Anniversary tickers DoriBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • (((((hugs))))  I am so sorry that you are having such a bad day.  You can come here and whine or vent anytime - you absolutely have the right.  And people drive me crazy with complaining too - sometimes they just have no idea how grateful they should be. 
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  • I'm sorry hon, I've totally done the water thing. More than once.

    re: the headaches, could it be anxiety? I have similar pains with panic attacks. ((hugs))

    Lilypie Second Birthday tickersLilypie Pregnancy tickers
  • Oh hun I am so sorry you were having a bad day.  I hope today is better.

    ITA, BTW, about FB.  I think Sunday was post pictures of your adorable babies day.

    Sending you tons of love.

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    ??? TTCAL Buddies w/ BabyTrippin & CashewsMommy ???
    1st BFP = m/c 4.21.08 @ 7W5D (and divorce)
    TTC #1 since 6.10
    SA #1=Agglutination SA #2= Everything perfect
    HSG= All clear & perfect
    Currently learning to live Child Free
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  • imageRawr08:

    Oh hun I am so sorry you were having a bad day.  I hope today is better.

    ITA, BTW, about FB.  I think Sunday was post pictures of your adorable babies day.

    Sending you tons of love.

    Ugh I know! There have been so many pregnancy, gender and birth announcements lately that I've seriously considered deleting my FB because its so depressing.  ((HUGS))

    "Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart"

    Our TTC Journey

    BabyFetus Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    I'm a mom to my 4 angel babies who were taken from us much to soon!
    BFP#1 on 09/29/09 and EP discovered/Left Tube lost on 10/19/09 EDD 06/12/10
    BFP# 2 on 03/21/2010 EDD 11/30/10 Natural M/C on 3/27/10
    BFP# 3 on 02/14/2011 EDD 10/28/11 Missed M/C discovered 4/19/11 and D&C 4/21/11 On 5/6/11 we found out our Oct Angel was a beautiful little girl <3
    IVF#1=BFP#4 on 8/31/11 EDD 5/12/12 EP discovered and MTX shot given 9/14/ & 9/21 M/C on 10/9/11
    IVF#2 and Stims started 12/2 ER 12/16 ET 12/21 transferred two beautiful blastocysts. Please stick LO's! BFP 12/26
    Benjamin Matthew Our Little Miracle Born 9/5/2012!
    BFP 1/2/14 EDD 9/11/14

  • Oh honey! I am so sorry!  Sometimes when it rains it pours!!! (((HUGS)))

    TTC since 5/2010
    DX with Diminished Ovarian Reserve - AMH of 1.1 - 7/2011; AMH of .42 8/2012
    BFP 9/1/10-M/C confirmed 9/8/10-Methotrexate 10/6/10
    IUI #1 (w/clomid)-9/5/11-BFN ; IUI #2 (w/clomid)-10/5/11 - BFP - 11/1/12-No sac seen; 11/2/11 and 11/9/11-Methotrexate 
    IVF #1- ER 2/2; ET 2/5;-Two 8 cell embryos transfered = BFFN
    Surprise BFP - 5/7/12
    U/S on 6/8/12 - H/B at 128 BPM; U/S on 6/14/12 @ 9wks-No H/B-D&C on 6/17/12
    IVF 2.0- ER 10/17; ET 10/20-One 12 cell, one 10 cell and one 8 cell embryo transfered
    BFP!   11/16/12 U/S- Two nuggets with perfect heartbeats! EDD 7/10/13

     

    5/31/2013- My miracles arrived at 34w2d!  Welcome to the world Harper and Nolan!Lilypie First Birthday tickers

    My Blog- http://waitingonaangel.wordpress.com/

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  • Oh hun.  Oh :(  I'm so sorry.  What a sh!t-tastic series of events and just blech, I'm sorry you're going through all of it.  

    The "I shoulda been"s are the worst.  

    FWIW, it sounds like you're functioning at about 1,000x what I was doing after my last m/c.  Dishes, what?  Leaving the house, what?  

    Be gentle with yourself, k?  It's OK to curl up in bed and cry for as many days as you need.   

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  • imageEclairAngst:

    Oh hun.  Oh :(  I'm so sorry.  What a sh!t-tastic series of events and just blech, I'm sorry you're going through all of it.  

    The "I shoulda been"s are the worst.  

    FWIW, it sounds like you're functioning at about 1,000x what I was doing after my last m/c.  Dishes, what?  Leaving the house, what?  

    Be gentle with yourself, k?  It's OK to curl up in bed and cry for as many days as you need.   

    Thanks love.  I think my problem is I try and keep myself really busy so I don't think about things and then when I have some down time it all hits me at once.  It's just hard to believe sometimes that I'm grieving the loss of my 4th child.  I hate that any of us have to be here!

    "Sometimes the smallest things take up the most room in your heart"

    Our TTC Journey

    BabyFetus Ticker

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    I'm a mom to my 4 angel babies who were taken from us much to soon!
    BFP#1 on 09/29/09 and EP discovered/Left Tube lost on 10/19/09 EDD 06/12/10
    BFP# 2 on 03/21/2010 EDD 11/30/10 Natural M/C on 3/27/10
    BFP# 3 on 02/14/2011 EDD 10/28/11 Missed M/C discovered 4/19/11 and D&C 4/21/11 On 5/6/11 we found out our Oct Angel was a beautiful little girl <3
    IVF#1=BFP#4 on 8/31/11 EDD 5/12/12 EP discovered and MTX shot given 9/14/ & 9/21 M/C on 10/9/11
    IVF#2 and Stims started 12/2 ER 12/16 ET 12/21 transferred two beautiful blastocysts. Please stick LO's! BFP 12/26
    Benjamin Matthew Our Little Miracle Born 9/5/2012!
    BFP 1/2/14 EDD 9/11/14

  • I'm so sorry.  Big ((((HUGS)))))

    PGAL/PAL welcome
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    Trying to start our family since 2010
    BFP #1 11.4.10, EDD 7.12.11, HB 12/9/10, MMC 12/27/10; 11w6d
    BFP #2 9.12.12, EDD 5.24.13, Baby Boy Born 5.15.13!!
    My Ovulation Chart
    3 Clomid (100mg) cycles + TI + Trigger = BFN's, Femara + Trigger + IUI#1 = BFN
    Femara + Trigger + IUI#2 = BFP!
    "Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will." ~Gandhi
  • Huge hugs. 
    Suze
    TTC#1 since May 2009
    PCOS * Hypothyroid

    Bean - BFP May 26, 2010. EDD Feb 3, 2011. Natural Miscarriage 8w5d - June 29, 2010.
    Pumpkin - BFP Feb 8, 2011. EDD Oct 21, 2011. Natural Miscarriage 6w3d - Feb 28, 2011.

    Femera started November 2014. 3 rounds, no luck. Moving to IUI.
    March 2015: IUI#1 - nope.
    May 2015: IUI#2 - nada.
    October 2015: IUI#3 - BFP on Nov 2, 2015! *stick baby stick!*

  • Oh hun, you've had a rough go of it. I'm sorry.

    ((HUGS))

    I hope you're feeling better today.

    image

    * PG #1 2/26/09: mm/c 4/14/09 at 10w4d | PG #2 8/5/09: mm/c 9/29/09 at 11w3d (boy) * 
    * CP's 4/14/10, 9/1/10, 4/19/11, 5/24/11, 10/14/13, 11/16/13 *
    * Ectopic 1/17/14 - nothing on u/s at 6w4d * 
    * PG #7 BFP 12/21/11 - DD born 8/31/12 * 
    * DH Dx'd with balanced translocation in 2011 *


    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

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