If you are on GP....come in...

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

Anyone else feel kind of sad about today's posts...

I love everyone and want everyone to feel loved...

but after today I just feel sad. Like I got my BFP and don't matter anymore--unless something tragic happens in which case it is cool for me to post because I will....what? be back in the TTC boat?

That really rubbed me the wrong way.

*steps off soapbox*

Stellarpuppy · September 2011

Forgive the newbie-ness but what is GP?

wypadek · September 2011

me too. I mean really? I purposely limit my stuff there, mainly because I DIDN'T have TTTC and don't want people who are having a rough night to have an even rougher time but really?

If I didn't want to keep up with people I would probably just wipe my hands of it because its got me on the verge of tears (I blame hormones) and its the freaking INTERWEBZ I mean come on, I shouldn't be crying lol

I missed the very first post but saw all the rest of them.

Also, I think your pmail was RIDICULOUS. really? ESPECIALLY with a t&p post!

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

Stellarpuppy:
Forgive the newbie-ness but what is GP?

hehe....it is a board over on the nest called "getting pregnant" ...Alot of us finally got our BFP's and wound up here!

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

wypadek:

me too. I mean really? I purposely limit my stuff there, mainly because I DIDN'T have TTTC and don't want people who are having a rough night to have an even rougher time but really?

If I didn't want to keep up with people I would probably just wipe my hands of it because its got me on the verge of tears (I blame hormones) and its the freaking INTERWEBZ I mean come on, I shouldn't be crying lol

I missed the very first post but saw all the rest of them.

Also, I think your pmail was RIDICULOUS. really? ESPECIALLY with a t&p post!

I couldn't really tell your reaction on the board so I was hoping to get a clearer picture to see if I was over reacting.
Yeah, the PM was ridiculous. I really want to out who it was but I wont because I don't stoop that low.

However, it is more ridiculous that once you get a BFP you suddenly are only allowed to post once a week...unless it is bad....its like-unless you lose your baby dont speak.

P.S. I almost cried too.

wypadek · September 2011

iLoveblueberries:

However, it is more ridiculous that once you get a BFP you suddenly are only allowed to post once a week...unless it is bad....its like-unless you lose your baby dont speak.

Which is ridiculous. Why would you want to go back to a board that told you to go away when you got some of the best news of your life when something bad happens?

Brie2010 · September 2011

I don't know. I've been posting/lurking on GP for over a year now, and honestly, I feel like this same argument was why GP Moms was created. When it was created, the boards split (IMO) not based on who was a mom and who wasn't, but based primarily on the oldies and the newbies (with some exceptions).

And now the newer crowd on GP is hashing out the same thing again, except there already is a GP Moms board with a regular crowd over there, and nobody wants to move over and be a newbie again...so regular GP is full of people who are KU again.

I don't know. I posted my BFP (over a few days until I was SURE) there, thanked everyone, and peaced out to GP Moms and/or this board for PR stuff. I post on GP a little bit when people are asking charting questions I know the answer to, or things that can really only be answered by people who have gotten BFPs, or to support people asking for T&Ps. But...I figure if anyone from GP is dying to know about my symptoms or ultrasounds as this pregnancy progresses, they'll lurk on GP Moms, which is what I did when the GPers I "knew" last year moved over there.

It's sad but I can understand their feelings.

k4slr6 · September 2011

Yep it makes me sad too. I feel like I have to think about everything I even remotely want to post. I feel kinda homeless now. I still feel new here.

LisaBea · September 2011

iLoveblueberries:
wypadek:

me too. I mean really? I purposely limit my stuff there, mainly because I DIDN'T have TTTC and don't want people who are having a rough night to have an even rougher time but really?

If I didn't want to keep up with people I would probably just wipe my hands of it because its got me on the verge of tears (I blame hormones) and its the freaking INTERWEBZ I mean come on, I shouldn't be crying lol

I missed the very first post but saw all the rest of them.

Also, I think your pmail was RIDICULOUS. really? ESPECIALLY with a t&p post!

I couldn't really tell your reaction on the board so I was hoping to get a clearer picture to see if I was over reacting.
Yeah, the PM was ridiculous. I really want to out who it was but I wont because I don't stoop that low.

However, it is more ridiculous that once you get a BFP you suddenly are only allowed to post once a week...unless it is bad....its like-unless you lose your baby dont speak.

P.S. I almost cried too.

That sounds so horrible. I didnt see it but I dont understand how people can be so mean. On TTGP here on TB, everyone is usually really supportive and dont mind if someone sticks around after their BFP. Sorry you had to go through that.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

k4slr6:

Yep it makes me sad too. I feel like I have to think about everything I even remotely want to post. I feel kinda homeless now. I still feel new here.

I feel a bit homeless now too....

jennyann28 · September 2011

Yep, I have been almost in tears as well. I've been on both sides of the fence, and the fact that this started out as a 3T thing PISSES ME OFF. I felt like I was being shunted by the very people that have been with me in this terrible "sorority" of infertility.

It stings A LOT when someone on that board gets pregnant easily. I won't lie, I feel bitter towards the numerous women on this board that are all, "Oh yay! I'm PG with 2u2 on my first try again!" But I think that as long as people post with grace and courtesy over there, we should not be made to feel uncomfortable posting.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

Brie2010:

I don't know. I've been posting/lurking on GP for over a year now, and honestly, I feel like this same argument was why GP Moms was created. When it was created, the boards split (IMO) not based on who was a mom and who wasn't, but based primarily on the oldies and the newbies (with some exceptions).

And now the newer crowd on GP is hashing out the same thing again, except there already is a GP Moms board with a regular crowd over there, and nobody wants to move over and be a newbie again...so regular GP is full of people who are KU again.

I don't know. I posted my BFP (over a few days until I was SURE) there, thanked everyone, and peaced out to GP Moms and/or this board for PR stuff. I post on GP a little bit when people are asking charting questions I know the answer to, or things that can really only be answered by people who have gotten BFPs, or to support people asking for T&Ps. But...I figure if anyone from GP is dying to know about my symptoms or ultrasounds as this pregnancy progresses, they'll lurk on GP Moms, which is what I did when the GPers I "knew" last year moved over there.

It's sad but I can understand their feelings.

I understand their feelings...

I spent about 11 years thinking I was unable to have children....and that hurts.
But I would never want that to influence the joy I feel for other people.

The TTC journey doesn't stop at the BFP....
You just board a new train.

I feel sad you had to "peace out" (that made me LOL).....Everyone should be happy for everyone!

You're right this exact thing happened before-I will be interested to see where it goes!

wypadek · September 2011

jennyann28:
Yep, I have been almost in tears as well. I've been on both sides of the fence, and the fact that this started out as a 3T thing PISSES ME OFF. I felt like I was being shunted by the very people that have been with me in this terrible "sorority" of infertility.
It stings A LOT when someone on that board gets pregnant easily. I won't lie, I feel bitter towards the numerous women on this board that are all, "Oh yay! I'm PG with 2u2 on my first try again!" But I think that as long as people post with grace and courtesy over there, we should not be made to feel uncomfortable posting.

This REALLY Pissed me off. That they would do this to YOU of all people.

Also, I want to apologize because I'm sure I caused some sting for you and I really don't mean to! Also, if you want to talk.... I AM a good listener.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

jennyann28:

Yep, I have been almost in tears as well. I've been on both sides of the fence, and the fact that this started out as a 3T thing PISSES ME OFF. I felt like I was being shunted by the very people that have been with me in this terrible "sorority" of infertility.

It stings A LOT when someone on that board gets pregnant easily. I won't lie, I feel bitter towards the numerous women on this board that are all, "Oh yay! I'm PG with 2u2 on my first try again!" But I think that as long as people post with grace and courtesy over there, we should not be made to feel uncomfortable posting.

Yes, I just....I spent a lot of years thinking I couldn't have children-so i understand that pain but seriously...I would NEVER let that dictate someone else's ability to share their happiness.

Now I feel like I can't post something unless it is about how baby or me are near death

sandrajean09 · September 2011

It was a little much. I'm sad they feel the way they do. I missed the first post, but caught most of the rest of them. I got a lot of good information from the ladies there. I haven't really posted over there except the occasional congrats to the newest BFPs.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

wypadek:
jennyann28:

Yep, I have been almost in tears as well. I've been on both sides of the fence, and the fact that this started out as a 3T thing PISSES ME OFF. I felt like I was being shunted by the very people that have been with me in this terrible "sorority" of infertility.

It stings A LOT when someone on that board gets pregnant easily. I won't lie, I feel bitter towards the numerous women on this board that are all, "Oh yay! I'm PG with 2u2 on my first try again!" But I think that as long as people post with grace and courtesy over there, we should not be made to feel uncomfortable posting.

I can understand the sting but please don't feel bad that you got PG easily.
and I hope post today did not make you feel like that

It is a "getting pregnant" board not a "infertility struggles board" there is no requirement for how long it is suppose to take you to get KTFU lol

This REALLY Pissed me off. That they would do this to YOU of all people.

Also, I want to apologize because I'm sure I caused some sting for you and I really don't mean to! Also, if you want to talk.... I AM a good listener.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

iLoveblueberries:
wypadek:
jennyann28:

Yep, I have been almost in tears as well. I've been on both sides of the fence, and the fact that this started out as a 3T thing PISSES ME OFF. I felt like I was being shunted by the very people that have been with me in this terrible "sorority" of infertility.

It stings A LOT when someone on that board gets pregnant easily. I won't lie, I feel bitter towards the numerous women on this board that are all, "Oh yay! I'm PG with 2u2 on my first try again!" But I think that as long as people post with grace and courtesy over there, we should not be made to feel uncomfortable posting.

I can understand the sting but please don't feel bad that you got PG easily.
and I hope post today did not make you feel like that

It is a "getting pregnant" board not a "infertility struggles board" there is no requirement for how long it is suppose to take you to get KTFU lol

AHHHH Messed up post fail ...I meant the bolded things dont know how it got all jumbled

jennyann28 · September 2011

wypadek:
jennyann28:
Yep, I have been almost in tears as well. I've been on both sides of the fence, and the fact that this started out as a 3T thing PISSES ME OFF. I felt like I was being shunted by the very people that have been with me in this terrible "sorority" of infertility.
It stings A LOT when someone on that board gets pregnant easily. I won't lie, I feel bitter towards the numerous women on this board that are all, "Oh yay! I'm PG with 2u2 on my first try again!" But I think that as long as people post with grace and courtesy over there, we should not be made to feel uncomfortable posting.
This REALLY Pissed me off. That they would do this to YOU of all people.
Also, I want to apologize because I'm sure I caused some sting for you and I really don't mean to! Also, if you want to talk.... I AM a good listener.

Thank you. I know that a lot of us PG 3Ters are feeling incredibly hurt that this was started by some of our own.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

jennyann28:
wypadek:
jennyann28:

Yep, I have been almost in tears as well. I've been on both sides of the fence, and the fact that this started out as a 3T thing PISSES ME OFF. I felt like I was being shunted by the very people that have been with me in this terrible "sorority" of infertility.

It stings A LOT when someone on that board gets pregnant easily. I won't lie, I feel bitter towards the numerous women on this board that are all, "Oh yay! I'm PG with 2u2 on my first try again!" But I think that as long as people post with grace and courtesy over there, we should not be made to feel uncomfortable posting.

This REALLY Pissed me off. That they would do this to YOU of all people.

Also, I want to apologize because I'm sure I caused some sting for you and I really don't mean to! Also, if you want to talk.... I AM a good listener.

Thank you. I know that a lot of us PG 3Ters are feeling incredibly hurt that this was started by some of our own.

*chants* Jenny for president! Jenny for President!

wypadek · September 2011

I do feel a little on the guilty side. That's part of the reason why I didn't put a ticker up right away. I've always felt like a bit of an outsider over there and figured I would have to have been TTC for at LEAST 8 months or have systematic losses or something before I would feel like I even kinda belonged.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

wypadek:
I do feel a little on the guilty side. That's part of the reason why I didn't put a ticker up right away. I've always felt like a bit of an outsider over there and figured I would have to have been TTC for at LEAST 8 months or have systematic losses or something before I would feel like I even kinda belonged.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW BEFORE I SEND A WILD BOAR TO ATTACK YOU!

Your fertility does not effect theirs. I am sorry you felt like you did not belong....everyone has a differnt GP journey-we should appreciate them all
*dances around in hippie circle with ribbons and flowers in hair*

wypadek · September 2011

iLoveblueberries:
wypadek:
I do feel a little on the guilty side. That's part of the reason why I didn't put a ticker up right away. I've always felt like a bit of an outsider over there and figured I would have to have been TTC for at LEAST 8 months or have systematic losses or something before I would feel like I even kinda belonged.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW BEFORE I SEND A WILD BOAR TO ATTACK YOU!

Your fertility does not effect theirs. I am sorry you felt like you did not belong....everyone has a differnt GP journey-we should appreciate them all
*dances around in hippie circle with ribbons and flowers in hair*

A wild boar? how did you pick THAT animal?

And I know this and keep telling myself that. I think its more that I don't like upsetting people and felt that this was upsetting them so of course a vicious circle starts.

iLoveblueberries · September 2011

wypadek:
iLoveblueberries:

wypadek:
I do feel a little on the guilty side. That's part of the reason why I didn't put a ticker up right away. I've always felt like a bit of an outsider over there and figured I would have to have been TTC for at LEAST 8 months or have systematic losses or something before I would feel like I even kinda belonged.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW BEFORE I SEND A WILD BOAR TO ATTACK YOU!

Your fertility does not effect theirs. I am sorry you felt like you did not belong....everyone has a differnt GP journey-we should appreciate them all
*dances around in hippie circle with ribbons and flowers in hair*

A wild boar? how did you pick THAT animal?

And I know this and keep telling myself that. I think its more that I don't like upsetting people and felt that this was upsetting them so of course a vicious circle starts.

Have you ever seena wild boar on TV....they are vicious!

wypadek · September 2011

iLoveblueberries:
wypadek:
iLoveblueberries:

wypadek:
I do feel a little on the guilty side. That's part of the reason why I didn't put a ticker up right away. I've always felt like a bit of an outsider over there and figured I would have to have been TTC for at LEAST 8 months or have systematic losses or something before I would feel like I even kinda belonged.

STOP IT RIGHT NOW BEFORE I SEND A WILD BOAR TO ATTACK YOU!

Your fertility does not effect theirs. I am sorry you felt like you did not belong....everyone has a differnt GP journey-we should appreciate them all
*dances around in hippie circle with ribbons and flowers in hair*

A wild boar? how did you pick THAT animal?

And I know this and keep telling myself that. I think its more that I don't like upsetting people and felt that this was upsetting them so of course a vicious circle starts.

Have you ever seena wild boar on TV....they are vicious!

I haven't..... I'm curious now.

k4slr6 · September 2011

This is why I didn't announce my BFP right away I just put the text in my sig. I wanted to see how the board was feeling that day first. Of course I was outed within 10 minuted. I agree a wild boar sounds terrifying. Indifferent

KSbride_to_be · September 2011

I've been really torn today about the whole thing.

I would like a weekly post where we can post some bump pics, ultrasounds, genders, etc. Things I would probably not post individually because I am overly sensitive of the board's feelings.

However, I am strongly against creating a new tttc board, as suggested tonight as a solution. That's where a lot of us would have been posting and we would be in the exact same situation as we are now when we finally got our bfp.

I feel like I can still offer a lot of valuable advice from my personal experience and also offer my friendship and support. I don't want to feel like I can't participate on the board.

I'm just feeling fortunate that so many GP gals are over here now. It's just going to take us time to learn the rest of the ladies on this board. (Plus I don't recognize screen names, so I may not notice if you post on this board unless I open it up and recognize your siggy.)

KSbride_to_be · September 2011

Oh, and to also add:

I think the PM was way out of line and I am very proud that so many other GP ladies jumped in to point that out.

jennyann28 · September 2011

KSbride_to_be:
However, I am strongly against creating a new tttc board, as suggested tonight as a solution. That's where a lot of us would have been posting and we would be in the exact same situation as we are now when we finally got our bfp.

I TOTALLY agree with this. Like you, I feel stuck in the middle.

KSbride_to_be · September 2011

Brie2010:

I paged you on here earlier today. Just wanted to make sure you saw it, not trying to force you to reply.

blumer · September 2011

After I got home tonight I got caught up with reading through the posts and they left me in tears. Bad tears. I'm mid post on one of the posts, but I think once the person that said the thing that started it all gets her BFP, she will be singing a different tune. I'd hate for this all to become another CCH situation... It is sad it came from a 3T, I was part of it for a short time, mostly because we had started to see an RE. I'm sorry I got PG, I thought that was the whole point. I'm sorry that some of the people are having more difficulties and will probably continue to do so; I wanted some of the 3Ters to get PG before I did because I knew I would end up feeling guilty in the end.

Right now I'm scared and nervous because I don't know what will happen. I'm trying to stay positive and take it one day at a time, but I'm praying for the positive and trying not to think about the bad things that can happen.

Like most of you, I feel homeless right now as well...

Oh and to top it all off, after my betas on Monday, the nurse STILL HASN'T CALLED!!!

ashleym373 · September 2011

I was only on GP for 2 months before my BFP. So I check out the board once in a while and post on t&p requests and that's it. I feel like since I was only there a short time I did not make some of the connections you ladies did so it would not be right for me to continue to post updates/etc, over there. I feel like they would not be received well nor cared about...which I do not mean anything bad by saying this at, just that I don't have friendship with anyone on the board. Regardless, I hope everyone works out one way or the other (not sure what happened over there) and the board returns to the support system it was.

amberm52 · September 2011

I could honestly see both sides of the fence's points of view. I just try to stay neutral.

nicole0066 · September 2011

I agree with Brie. I was also posting before there was the split between GP/GPM so this isn't something new. I do think it's sad that so many of the women who regularly posted there and got to know everyone now feel like they aren't welcome. There have been a lot of new bfp's and first appointments so it may seem like a lot of PR posts, but I haven't really seen any posts about "the small things".

I will still post over there, but moreso to offer advice. I loved the advice that I got from everyone and can honestly say if I didn't learn what I did about charting, opk's, etc I probably wouldn't be pregnant now.

So, like Brie said, it's sad, but I see both sides. I do think that it got blown out of proportion and things could have been said a lot differently. On the other hand, I'm excited to see so many GP'ers now on the May board!!!!

MrsB4E · September 2011

I often lurked on GP and asked a few questions here and there .. so I didnt even annouce our BFP for fear they think I was a driveby when really I had been following the board for a while now and had even asked questions about prenatals in the beginning of this year ......... I learned sooo much from GP and I recognize so many of you ladies from the Board and I want to just say Congrats and its great to see you ladies here .......

I am just 4 weeks due May 30, 2011 so I am very cautiously here...... I felt that sometimes that board was not fair to people who got their BFP... its a Getting Pregnant board at some time people with get pregnant .. my heart aches for a lot of women on that board who have gone through years of the unknown .. I have so many family and friends and I understand that hurt ....... I pray for their BFP soon...

I hope I can finally make a home somewhere too with you ladies

rsrs807 · September 2011

I was never on GP - I posted on TTGP - but I did lurk occasionally and just went over and read some of the posts.

Everything else aside - can I ask why you all don't have a check-in on that board? TTGP has a "TTGP Grad Check-In" once a week and I think besides giving a one-stop-shop so to speak to follow up with any TTGPers you still want to talk to, it also streamlines the board a great deal so its NOT cluttered up with a lot of update posts. But the grads still post on a regular basis elsewhere on the board.

I'm not sure if BOB has something similar or not.

KSbride_to_be · September 2011

I just introduced myself on the GPM board.

Looks like I'll see a lot of you over there now. It will be nice to see familiar faces in the posts.

This board really overwhelms me. And, not to sound snarky, but 90% of the posts don't interest me in the least.

rsrs807 · September 2011

KSbride_to_be:

I just introduced myself on the GPM board.

Looks like I'll see a lot of you over there now. It will be nice to see familiar faces in the posts.

This board really overwhelms me. And, not to sound snarky, but 90% of the posts don't interest me in the least.

LOL.

I think honestly birth month boards get more interesting as the pregnancies progress, there aren't the daily introductions as everyone gets their BFPs, and we all get to know each other.

KSbride_to_be · September 2011

rsrs807:
KSbride_to_be:

I just introduced myself on the GPM board.

Looks like I'll see a lot of you over there now. It will be nice to see familiar faces in the posts.

This board really overwhelms me. And, not to sound snarky, but 90% of the posts don't interest me in the least.

LOL.

I think honestly birth month boards get more interesting as the pregnancies progress, there aren't the daily introductions as everyone gets their BFPs, and we all get to know each other.

That's what I'm anticipating and why I'm trying to get to know people and post.

sapphireb · September 2011

Jenny, wyp, blumer, blueberries...

I am sorry that you all are so upset and think we don't care about you and your babies.

Niecy posted, in a dedicated 3T checkin, that it was HARD FOR HER to see all the PG and BR posts. Those of you who were 3T should be able to understand that. It's like if your BFF gets a BFP. You're happy for her, but it's hard to hear all the details.

That does NOT mean you don't want her to share those details. That just means that sometimes it's hard to hear them.

Now, there might have been one or two posters that said you should leave. But the MAJORITY of the board, 3Ters included, agreed that we did NOT want that.

Anyway the point of this is not to argue but hopefully to make you see that most of us do not feel the way you think we do, so there is really no reason to be hurt/offended, KWIM?

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