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April 2012 Moms
onetxjewel
member
Has anyone decided to have just 1...
onetxjewel
member
So DH and I got married July 9th and we had always said we wanted 2 children. I got pregnant about 3.5 weeks after we got married (we were trying but shocked that it happened so fast!!!) and we are beyond excited! I've been really sick and unfortunately me feeling bad has led to our house being a wreck and me not contributing as much as i usually do and DH has been awesome! But I can't help but feel that this may be the only one for me. I'm not sure if I want to go through all of this again. I don't want this to sound selfish but i'm just so excited about having this one but really don't know if i want to put my myself through this and what's to come again. I'm an only child so for me I know what a household with one child is like, my DH on the other hand is the middle of 5 children. He'll joke sometimes when I can't get up off hte sofa that I may be right and this may be the only one but then he'll laugh it off and later tell me we'll be having another! We have said from the get go that we wouldn't try for a second until 3 or 4 years after the first. (We're both 28)
Is anyone else just wanting one child? We went to a texans football game 2 weeks ago and I saw a family there with their daughter and her boyfriend and it just reminded me of me growing up and all the fun things I got to experience because I was an only child and my parents even said if they had another one then we wouldn't have done half the things we did. I want to give my child experiences and memories and i'm nervous if we have more than one that it will be more of a financial strain....granted we are financially stable and will be with our baby...I think i'm just in over annalyzing mode right now...
Thoughts?
~Julia~
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Has anyone decided to have just 1...
I am an only child, so i'd def. like to have more than 1 so that they are not bored like I was lol. However, I totally see your point about being sick/tired etc. and not wanting to go through it again.
My BF had a baby last year and she had a rough pg, especially since her boyfriend is younger and they were def. not trying. She swore to me that she would only ever have the 1, but now that she is almost 1yo, she wants another one lol. I think the decision of how many to have should be an open-ended question. You never know how you will feel a year or 2 from now.
I don't think wanting 1 child is a bad thing. I've joked with DH that after all this I only want 1. But I'd like at least 2. We both grew up with siblings to play with and talk to and I want my kid to have that. I figure we will just play it by ear, after the first gets to be around at least 2, we will see if we want to plan for another.
Plus every pregnancy is different. My mom talked about how awful it was with my older brother but how easy everything was with me. So it might be tough this time, but maybe better next time.
Just do what is right for your family.
I used to want 2. I will never do this again. I have been to the OB weekly since 9 weeks, 7u/s and nothing but worry and anxiety. I can not mentally handle this again. I would much rather be throwing up than seeing blood any day.
If we still want more than 1, we will be adopting #2.
Obviously, we changed our minds
7 years later, I obviously forgot how bad it was the first time. *puke*
Everyone always said, "oh, the n/v can't be as bad as it was with DD".
Really? Because it's 10x worse now.
We'd both like more than one. But I also think you can never say what you will do until the time comes.
mm 2/17/11 * dd born 4/20/12 * bo 1/3/14 * edd 1/21/ 1/15
Pretty much this. DH and I decided we'll take it by pregnancy (first one determines the second, the second determines the third, etc.). Ideally we would like to have three children, but we're also just seeing how it goes.
1st off I have to tell you that thinking of having another one right now in your state is a real no-no!
I couldn't even THINK of having another until DS turned 18 months and the FEVER started to set in. I am also an only child and so I want to give DS a sibling to grow up with.
Bottom line - You BOTH must be on board for having another baby - no exceptions. Whatever that may be - having another or stopping at one - is your and your husband's choice and yours alone.
Don't stress over all the 'if's' It's only just begun.
I am 9 weeks 3 days preggers with baby #2
I have my daughter from my previous marriage and my husband and I have decided we'd like to have 4 altogether.
I have a very good friend who is due in Nov (which is bittersweet because she had a miscarriage in November a few years back) and we were talking about it and she believes that as of right now this will be her only pregnancy, but they do hope to adopt 1 or 2 children, and she has left the door open for a potential 2nd biologicial child down the line.
DD1- 12/26/05 DD2- 4/12/12
I was VERY sick with DS but I've always known I wanted 2-4 kids. This pregnancy has been much easier so far ( I deserve it after 20 weeks of bedrest last time!!). If this is a girl we are likely to be done mostly because it makes sense financially and with our busy lives. I can't say for sure we are done after this but we may be. Things change I woudn't make any permanent birth control decision for some time.
You may change your mind and your next pregnancy may be easier. And if its not, they are still worth all of it.