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Question about mediation and custody

Sweet face 82Sweet face 82
in Single Parents

STBXH and I had a meeting with our lawyers where we discussed a pretty good agreement.  We are in the process of writing it up and now he is trying to sneak in more stuff into the papers that got sent from his lawyer that we did not agree to. We have a mediation appointment set for later this coming week which I am keeping until papers are officially signed.  Does anyone know in NJ what the standard parenting time is that a mediator will present? 

I'm pretty sure that him being difficult now will result in him being awarded less time through a mediator and the court than what we talked about n our meeting and he is trying to add more time into the paperwork under the guise that we already agreed upon this-which we did NOT (his being unreasonable and stubborn and spiteful usually comes back to bite him).  Plus, he has not paid CS in 4 weeks.  I'm so ready for this to be done and just have a schedule worked out, rather than everything up in the air.

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Re: Question about mediation and custody

  • CPA04CPA04

    A mediator will not propose nor award anything.  The mediator's role is to help the two of you come to an agreement on your own. 

    Make sure before you sign ANYTHING you go through the paperwork with a fine tooth comb, word by word.  My XH failed to do this (or so it seems) and gets all up in arms telling me I "can't do that!"  Then I remind him it's what the decree says and we AGREED to that, so that's how it is.  He grumbles and I laugh (on the inside) and we move forward because I know the court order backs me.

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  • Sweet face 82Sweet face 82
    Interesting to know...I guess I was wondering if there seems to be a standard parenting plan that most parents agree to (the judge said the mediator could suggest stuff to us and I didn't know what types she might).  My lawyer goes over EVERYTHING and I am very wary as well.  I guess I am mostly scared that once again, we will be close to finalizing custody and then he will either not sign, back out during the 10 day lawyer review period or something.  This entire situation makes me very anxious...not to mention the fact that any kindness or ability to be amicable that I show to him gets thrown in my face.  He is very difficult to deal with, and it is difficult to get him to try to think about DS's best interests instead of his own.  *Sigh*
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