TTC After a Loss 6 Months+

The unexplainable is explained!

I went in for a mid-cycle u/s today and everything looks good. Even though I'm only a week into my cycle the injectibles made me grow two huge follicles, so I triggered tonight and go in for my IUI on Thursday morning. But that's not the exciting part...

My RE goes over my husband's Kruger SA results. Apparently he has 0% morphology, so our only viable option for getting KU is IVF with ICSI. We decided to complete this IUI cycle because, hey, why not? I cannot tell you how relieved I am to finally know what the problem is! It's like a weight has been lifted off of my shoulders. I HATED always wondering "why?" Unexplained infertility was the bane of my existence. At least now I know what we are dealing with.

My husband took it harder than I expected. I think he was disappointed in himself, he felt like he was letting me down somehow. I tried to be as supportive and reassuring as possible. He seemed to get over it pretty quickly, haha.

On Thursday I'm going to ask our RE about whether or not DH should go to an appointment with a urologist who specializes in infertility. I know that vericoceles can cause damage to morphology, so it seems like it would be worth checking whether DH has one. If he does and it can be fixed, then there's a chance that we could get KU naturally. If not, then it's on to IVF with ICSI. Either way I'm very excited.

One thing I am kind of annoyed about: My doctor got the results in May of this year but didn't talk to me (or DH) about it until today. We thought we got the results online, so we didn't ask our RE. It turns out that they released everything except the abnormal results. I am irritated because if we had been told in a timely manner we wouldn't have wasted hundreds of dollars, not to mention three months time, on unnecessary IUIs and doctor's appointments. I wonder if I should question him about this? And if I do, how should I approach him about this? Curious? Confrontational? I don't think he'd give me a refund, so I'm not sure if there's a point to mentioning it...

Anyway, thanks for reading my mini-novel. This is still the best bad news I've gotten in quite a while. I feel like I have a direction now! Yay!

Re: The unexplainable is explained!

  • I'm so happy you have answers! I'd for sure question him about it. I'd start out curious, and then go from there.  There is no reason that you should have had to put the money into a procedure that he knew wouldn't work. Maybe since he knew, could he apply the costs of the IUI's to the IVF cycle?
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  • imageLilMaggs:
    I'm so happy you have answers! I'd for sure question him about it. I'd start out curious, and then go from there.  There is no reason that you should have had to put the money into a procedure that he knew wouldn't work. Maybe since he knew, could he apply the costs of the IUI's to the IVF cycle?

    Ooooh, good idea. Worth a try!

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  • I am glad your unexplained is now explained!  Totally sucky about needing IVF w/ICSI but at least you have a fighting chance now.

    I would also talk with your RE about the results and the length of time it took him to speak with you both about it.  ITA w/Maggs, ask him about, maybe they will be able to put the price towards your new attempts.  I think that would be the right thing to do any way.

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  • Oh wow! I am upset that your doctor didn't talk to you about the results sooner!!! I mean, something like 0% morphology is something you NEED to know about right away! I'm so sorry that you are going through this. 


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  • I'm glad you got some answers! But I too would be upset that he's known for three months and didn't tell you. It might have been an office mixup (maybe he didn't see the results until now for some reason?), but in my opinion it's a very large one. Either way I think at least a portion of your IUI costs should be applied to IVF. I hope you're able to get that!
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  • Personally, I would be livid and I would, without a doubt, be confrontational.  It could almost been seen as deliberately withholding the information so you'd spend more $$ on IUIs and appointments.  What would you think if your car mechanic knew of an issue and waited until you'd paid for several other repairs before telling you he knew what the likely problem was all along.  

    I think you're probably right about a refund, but I'd demand one anyway.  Clearly state the issue and then what you want in return for his oversight.  

    I'm mad for you!  That's total crap! 

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  • Wow, I'm glad you finally got some answers!  I really don't understand why your RE let you spend time and money on treatments that he knows wouldn't work?  I am having a hard time with that.  He's either not very good or he is scamming you for money.  Either way, I would consider a new RE.  Don't you think?
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  • I'm glad you got an answer!  I would be furious with my RE though if he withheld pertinent information like that for so long.  That is unacceptable.  I would definitely try to get my money back. 
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  • imagelunatwo:
    Wow, I'm glad you finally got some answers!  I really don't understand why your RE let you spend time and money on treatments that he knows wouldn't work?  I am having a hard time with that.  He's either not very good or he is scamming you for money.  Either way, I would consider a new RE.  Don't you think?

    Without a doubt. If my husband doesn't have a structural problem that can be fixed by a urologist we'll be doing IVF. If we do IVF, it will NOT be through the clinic we've been going to. Where we've been going is an extension of our regular healthcare, so it was just easier at first when we were in the beginning stages. After doing some research lately, though, I see that they are not even one of the top 5 places in San Diego (according to the CDC's records) and they charge the same amount. Even including my insurance "discount." So, I wouldn't want the difference to be applied to an IVF there, for sure.

    So far my plan is to go in for my IUI tomorrow as planned, ask him for a referral to a urologist specializing in infertility, and then ask him about why he didn't tell me about the results three months ago. I'm guessing he'll say something about how there was "still a chance" with the IUI's we ended up doing during that time or some other BS. I don't have a lot of confidence that I'm going to get money back from an insurance company, though!

  • For some unknown reason, men take pride in their sperm. 

     Sperm do "change" every three months, so it sounds like he needs to quit smoking (if he does that) and get on a vitamin regimen, which should help with the SA stuff.   Also when my DH quit smoking his numbers went way high and the vitamins helped as well.  He went from crappy sperm to amazing sperm, yet in the mean time my tubes became crap...so we ended up with ivf anyways. 

    Also, I would be fully annoyed if my RE did not talk about the morph problem earlier.  

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  • I'm so happy that your Dr. was able to give you guys some real answers and that you feel better about everything.  I hate the term "unexplained infertility"!

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  • I'm happy you have answers. I'm sorry that the doctor took SO long to get those results to you. If I were you I would consult with a urologist, maybe there is something that can be fixed. DH has a vericoceles that was found during a regular physical, however when his sperm counts came out ok we decided to wait until we were done TTCAL before he went for any treatment. I hope you are able to find some answers soon.
  • *ticker warning*

     

    I'm so glad you finally found out what the problem was but SUCKS they never told you sooner!! that is ridiculous!  seriously. 

    I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you!!!

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  • Shame on your doctor for not telling you sooner, but good for you for being positive about it!

    I'm so glad you got answers and have a plan moving forward. I hope it works for you!

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  • I'm so sorry you got that news.  I agree that your doctor should not have waited so long to tell you and I'm surprised he didn't change your plan knowing what he did.  It wouldn't hurt to bring it up and see what he does to make it right.
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  • I'm so glad you guys have gotten some answers and an idea of where to go from here.

     

    And yeah, I'd be TOTALLY peeved at paying for a couple of cycles after the doctor knew about the severe MFI. WTF?? 

  • The morph is a rough issue, my DH has that problem too. 0% on one SA and 1% on another.   I will tell you though, desite that we did get KU twice on our own, once from IUI and then once from IVF w/ ICSI (so 4 times total).  Now, none of them lasted ( that is most likely an egg issue due to my age), but it is possible to get KU with bad morph without IVF, as we did 3 times.  Just wanted you to know my experience.

    My RE is having DH start taking fertility blend for men; co-Q 10 (an anti-oxident) and Omega 3 fish oil.  Nothing will greatly improve morph (unless there is an issue like you mentioned), but she thinks it is a good idea anyway.  So we are going to try it, it can't hurt.  I think seeing a urologist may be a good idea, might as well cover all the bases.

    I would have been really upset too - you should have been given those results.  I would definately say something.  You deserved to be given all of your results so you could make an educated decision.  I would put it out there that you may not have spent money on an IUI if you had known and leave it out there to see what they say.  That would really piss me off!!! 

    Good luck hun, as much as the results suck, it's better to know what you are dealing with. 

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  • I'm glad you got some answers, but really annoyed that the dr waited so long to give them to you. Glad that you will be going to another dr to do IVF.

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  • I'm so glad you have answers and now there's a plan of action.

    I'd be FURIOUS with your doctor and demand something, either money back, or $ credited towards IVF...something. There's no excuse for waiting three months to give you results back, all the while you plunking money away. 

    I really want to slap this doctor.

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  • Glad you got some answers at last (isn't it a strange world where finding a problem is actually kind of a relief?).  I seriously want to slap your doc, though.  Uncool.

  • I'm so glad you have some answers sweetie! Best of luck going forward with a new plan!!
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