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Question to ask my attorney? (2nd appt)

supermom2008supermom2008
in Single Parents

I had an initial consult with my attorney and she went through the nute and bolts of divorce in my state, what to expect in CS etc. Latet, I was talking to a friend who told me that I can ask the court to have  my STBXH pay some of melegal expenses. So I sent my atoorney an e-mail and she says  yes, that is very common (as he makes a lot more money than I do). Well, why in the world did she not mention this to me??? So now I think I need to be better prepared for my next meeting with her. We have one son, 3.5 years old and a marital home purchased 2.5 years ago. Please help me with some questions to bring up. I came up with these:

1. Including a plan for STBXH to pay some of DS's college expenses.

2. XH to have DS on his insurance

3. XH to have a life insurance policy x3 his annual income with DS as sole benf.

4. XH to pay legal fees if I have to take him to court to pay CS.

5. Ask for alimony for 3 years-(I used to make $56k but I quit my job and moved to his home state at his request and became a sahm for 3.5 years. I just started work
 in July and now make only 32k . I need get additional training to make the kind of money I used to make)...Is this reasonable? He makes $82k+bonus

 

Please let me know what you think and what other things I should bring up.

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Re: Question to ask my attorney? (2nd appt)

  • HisChamaoleGirlHisChamaoleGirl member

    1. College is a luxary, not a must. Did you and STBXH have a college fund set up for DS before splitting? If so, then I would suggest you keep adding funds to it.

    2. You cant require  your STBXH to put your child as a beneficiary on his life insurance. My DH ex tried to do the same thing but because DH wouldnt agree to it, her lawyers could not force it in the paperwork.

    3. I think asking for alimony is reasonable since you and DH decided being a SAHM was in your family's best interest. How long were you married for? That will also play into how long you can receive alimony.

    4. Who will be claiming DS for taxes ? WIll you alternate every other year? Will he claim him if you arent working and then give you part of the refund?

    5. Who will pay for visitation transportation? Will an escort be required when transporting child between visitation?

     6. How will medical costs not covered by insurance be handled? 50/50 ?

    I hope my suggestions help

    BFP #1 11/07/2012 EDD 07/09/2013 M/C 11/22/2012

    BFP #2 02/05/2013 EDD 09/19/2013 Arrived via c-section 09/27/2013

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  • PrincessFiona9PrincessFiona9 member

    It seems like you are only talking about the money. What about custody and visitation? You need to work out where LO will spend holidays each year, vacations etc.

    Also discuss costs for extracurricular activities as your LO gets older, such as sports, band etc. Maybe add a clause that your STBX split the costs with you.

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  • BostonGayGalBostonGayGal member

    I suspect that she didn't bring it up because it is one of the very last steps towards the end of the case, not because she wasn't on the ball.  Since she can't guarantee the result (only the judge can), it does you no good to depend upon it, so she probably doesn't want to fill you with hope prematurely.

     



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  • taparhamtaparham member
    I've never been married but know people who have been through divorce/s.  One lady that works with me got half of her husband pension.  They were in their 50's so I don't know if age makes a difference or not.  Decide when he can have your DS especially during the holidays.  I dated a guy who had his daughter on Christmas morning and then she went to her mom in the afternoon. She always looked sad for being uprooted on Christmas.  Of course she wanted to be with her Mom.  My boss's X has to pay half of their kids college tuition. Another person I know husband has to pay half for any sports or programs they wanted to be in.  Like I said I've never been married only know people who have.  Hope these tips are helpful.
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  • Ariana2O11Ariana2O11 member
    Like PP stated, don't forget that you are entitled to half of his 401k, IRA, other retirement funds.
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  • supermom2008supermom2008
    Thank you!
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