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Questioning having a 3rd...

scott&kimscott&kim
in Parenting after 35

So I never intended to have any children of my own and then I had my DD and fell in love with the idea, then my DS came and even with a rough pregnancy we have had a pretty painless transition from one kid to two.  We are still BFing (YAY) and now DH and I are throwing around the option one more.  

For those of you that work and have three - how was that transition?  I'm worried about daycare costs and being able to give all the kids all the extras that we would really like to provide (lessons, travel, college, etc).   

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Re: Questioning having a 3rd...

  • ateytelbateytelb
    I work and technically have 3 but my #1 is a senior in college, so no advice or experience to share here...
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  • KerryHSKerryHS

    I just had my third, but I have a pretty big age gap between them (11,9, and 8 months).  I have one babysitter (who drives) who takes care of all three of them.  The transition is what you would expect.  A lot of work.  Lots of juggling, Worth every second. 

    It will be a lot harder and a lot more stressful if having the third causes you to watch every penny.  You will know if it is right for you.  Good luck with your decision.

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  • gimmietimmiesgimmietimmies member

    Ultimately you'll know if 3 is right for you. Financially, you make it work. I'm going back to work next month, so I have to put K & S in full time and E in half-time (kindergarten is half days here). But daycare is so short term, so I don't expect that expense forever. Once we are done with daycare, the money that was being spent there will go towards sports, extra curricular, and education savings. We never had it as disposable income, so it won't be missed. Extra coming in will go to vacations, and other extras.

    As for college and weddings, there will be some money there to help each of them, but they need to go halves. And with weddings, who knows if or when for that, so I'm not worried. We might chip in, but foot the bill, likely not.

    And as for things for the kids, I'm a bargain hunter, so I search out deals. It's all doable, and I've found great tips on frugal living sites. I use what works for us. We all have nice clothes (hands up for the Nine West addict), nice cars and nice things in the house. But we didn't put ourselves at risk or over budget doing any of it.

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  • PeskyPesky member
    I agree with gimmietimmies -- it's a question of if your family feels complete yet.  The rest falls into place with a little work.  If you were financially strained now and barely making it, might be wise to take a harder look but otherwise, you tend to find the money somehow as other things don't seem as necessary.


    image
    DD -- 5YO
    DS -- 3YO

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