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May 2011 Moms
rainfallki
member
Talk to me about healthy sleep...
rainfallki
member
So I keep meaning to read some of the healthy sleep books, and I just don't have time. Especially now that I'm back to work.
Since I've gone back to work, our little guy (3 months old) has been primarily napping in the nanny's arms. That's where he falls asleep and any time you try to put him down he wakes and screams. So he just stays there. She doesn't have a problem with it and I don't necessarily either... but having not read any sleep books, I don't know if I should have a problem with it.
So, for those that have read the healthy sleep books, tell me what you know. Is sleeping in someone's arm's healthy? Not healthy? What about swings or inclines?
For the record - our little guy has been sleeping through the night since he was 2 weeks old (for us, that means at least 6 hours, most nights 8 hours). He's always been an OK napper, just easily awaken during his naps.
Boy #1, born 6/5/2011
Boy #2, born 8/27/2014
Currently... Pregnant with mo/di BOY TWINS! Due September 15. Latest induction will be 37w.
Boy #2, born 8/27/2014
Currently... Pregnant with mo/di BOY TWINS! Due September 15. Latest induction will be 37w.
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Talk to me about healthy sleep...
In my experience, sleep problems are often caused by poor sleep associations. This means the baby associates falling asleep with a specific cue (e.g. nursing, being rocked, a swing, being held) and cannot fall asleep without it. Even if they occasionally fall asleep at other times, like in the car, they generally rely on this cue to go to sleep. The baby does not learn to fall asleep on their own. This is why the baby cries when your nanny puts him down--he is relying on her holding him to be able to sleep.
Poor sleep associations can be replaced with positive sleep associations, like a bedtime routine. The key here is to put your baby down awake. They will then learn to fall asleep on their own. This also decreases night wakings because if the baby wakes up during the night (which is actually a normal part of the sleep cycle at all ages), they can put themselves back to sleep instead of crying for you to come rock them, nurse them, etc.
So falling asleep in your nanny's arms could cause nap issues down the road. As your baby gets older and bigger, the nanny may want to be able to put him down for naps. But it's up to you whether you want to try to change this now or not. HTH.
Everything iris said. We worked very hard frm the day LO was born to help her learn to fall asleep on her own. I will still rock her to sleep sometimes, I did for this morning's nap, but she doesn't need me to do it.
I read a ton of books, picked and chose what I wanted to use, and it's working for us. But it might not work for someone else, and without them having the full background & science of why we chose the the bits we did, I think it'd be pretty difficult to implement.
For example, if someone said "CIO worked for us" that doesn't necessarily mean I should just go leave my kid in the bed to CIO until she falls asleep. There are other steps in there, and I personally like knowing the reasoning behind why I'm doing is supposed to work.
Iris, Pook - do either of you have a specific book you'd recommend? I'm really kinda wondering if our little guy just doesn't like the nanny. He'll fall asleep on his own most times for me (he does every night, for example - we ALWAYS put him down awake, but drowsy), but it seems like he just gets angry at the nanny. Maybe he just needs to adjust to it being someone other than mommy or daddy... it's only been 8 days that she's been here so far.
Boy #2, born 8/27/2014
Currently... Pregnant with mo/di BOY TWINS! Due September 15. Latest induction will be 37w.
The book we've used is Sleeping Through the Night by Jodi Mindell. It helped us completely turn things around with our daughter's sleep issues.
And just for the record, I used to be adamantly opposed to CIO/sleep training. I thought kids would learn to sleep on their own just fine if parents were patient enough, and I thought CIO was cruel. But I've since learned that the way you parent can really affect your child's sleep and that CIO done right is not cruel. Although, like pook said, it involves more than just letting the kid cry.
I just came in here, and kind of "awww'd" at you giving sleep training advice. I know you learned a lot with Iris (aka, how many months of hell was that? lol) and I think you gave some great advice here.
OP, I also like Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child to help you understand your child's sleep patterns and needs. Right now, I'm re-reading The Sleep Easy Solution, because it worked the best in the 6-12 months range for my DS. Let's just say I have a LOT of sleep books. lol
It's funny, isn't it?
A little, yes.
I think people really misunderstood my points on the sleep training posts back then. I have never been a fan of letting a baby just cry. EVER. But so many people read CIO and automatically think that's what is happening. Not *always* the case, as we now know.
Plus, CIO was supposedly a term made up by AP fans to make it sound more cruel than it is.
As for books...I read Babywise and Baby Whisperer which were helpful early on to help us know why routines are important. I really loved www.momsoncall.com but for books, I think for our LO's age, Solve Your Child's Sleep Problems.
I have to say, we haven't really had to do much sleep learning. She has been putting herself to sleep for a long time b/c of the Baywise/EASY routine. I just worked hard early to help her be a good sleeper and napper. I read Dr. Ferber in case we needed it for breaking the swaddle, but other than just letting her fuss for about five minutes...she started falling asleep by herself again.
I think you can pick pretty much any method and just follow it, it will work.