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foster-adopt story - sad :(

jodonjodon
in Adoption

After 6 years TTC, my sister signed up for the foster-adopt program (in PA).  On October 2, they were told that there was a newborn baby waiting at the hospital that needed a home.  They picked the baby up at the hospital on October 4.  They were told that the BM was suffering from mental illness, and while they couldn't guarantee, there was a 90% chance that the baby would be available for adoption.

They found out a few weeks later that there was another adoptive family fighting for the baby.  All they could find out about the other family was that they're from the other side of the state, they're rich, and they were in line to adopt the last baby that the BM had, but the adoption fell through when the BF (different BF) stepped up and took custody.  Since there was no relation, my sister really didn't think the other family could get custody.  Wrong...

There was a hearing yesterday  The BM waived her parental rights, and she was given the option of granting custody to either CYF (and thus my sister) or the other adoptive family.  She chose the other adoptive family.  The case worker came to my sister's house yesterday afternoon and took the baby to his new home.

My sister is devastated.  She knew there was a possibility that the biological parents could re-gain custody, but to lose out to another adoptive family.... it sucks, to say the least.

I know the laws vary by state, but has anyone else heard of anything like this happening?

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Re: foster-adopt story - sad :(

  • kirstenw05kirstenw05

    With anything (including having bio children), there is always risk. I am sorry for your sister's loss, and hope she doesn't give up! There are so many kids/babies out there waiting for homes.  I am sure HER baby will come soon.

    Keep your chin up!

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  • jodonjodon
    You're right... the whole process is really draining her and her DH.   The up's are awesome, but the downs are so hard to sit back and watch. Sad   I have so much respect for anyone who has gone or is going through the adoption process.   I guess you just have to have faith that when it's right, it'll happen.
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  • come*on*babycome*on*baby

    i haven't heard of anything like that, but with foster care, anything is possible. the BioParents, no matter how terrible they are, always get a say in their children, unfortunately sometimes. it's a learning process and there will definitely be ups and down, and probably more downs, sadly.

    there's a baby out there for your sister, but she was a mommy to that baby when he needed it! :) 

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  • MayDayGirlMayDayGirl member

    I am so sorry, I cannot imagine how devistating that would be. Honestly as a potential adoptive parent I cannot imagine taking a child away from another couple who's had a child for over a month, no matter how much I wanted a baby.

    I am so sorry. 

    Married on 3.20.2004. It took 30 month, 2 failed adoptions and IVF for our first miracle. We have had 9 foster kids since he was born and started the domestic adoption process when he was 10 month old, we had 4 failed matches in that time. After our daughter was born we brought her home and spent 2 weeks fearing we might lose her because of complications that came up. But Praise God all went through and she is ours forever! Expecting again after IVF Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Pregnancy Ticker Lilypie Kids Birthday tickers image
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