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How to deal with major anxiety

may2806may2806 member
in Pregnant after IF

I can't seem to stop worrying that something is wrong, despite the bleeding stopping and every u/s so far being good. My last u/s was last Monday (a week ago from yesterday), and my next is tomorrow. I'm convinced something is wrong. 

I don't really have many symptoms, no bloating, no m/s. I have some minor things that I could attribute to the meds, or just to being in my head - being a bit tired, swollen boobs, a tiny bit of mild nausea. But nothing that I can clearly say is because of the pregnancy. So then I convince myself that because I don't feel any different the baby must not be growing. I just can't wrap my head around something being inside my body that I can't "know" is there.

I'm crazy, right? I have an appointment with my therapist today. I'm just worried she'll convince me that nothing's wrong, and then I'll go tomorrow for an u/s and there will be no heartbeat.

Dx: High FSH, stage IV endo, homozygous C677T MTHFR and PAI-1
Early loss 10/08
Lap 1/09
IVF #1 "natural IVF" - 1 egg retrieved, missed m/c
Tried several mini-stim cycles with no response
Switched clinics - dx'd as carrier for Fragile X
IVF #2 MDL protocol Jan/Feb converted to IUI, BFN
IVF #2 take 2: Antagonist, one embie, BFN
IVF #3: Antagonist, no fertilization
One last ditch effort at OE IVF (antagonist with Clomid) cancelled
DE cycle #1 Jan/Feb 2011, BFP, ectopic
DE cycle #2 June/July 2011 - BFP
10/28/11 Baby girl lost at 17 weeks due to pre-term labor. We love and miss you.
DE cycle #3 June/July 2012 - BFP, twins, both heartbeats stopped, D&C
2 frosties but don't know what's next
FET Dec 2012: BFP! Praying this one sticks for the long haul!
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Re: How to deal with major anxiety

  • MrsMAFMrsMAF member
    I think a good majority of women on this board have experienced anxiety about the pregnancy. The beginning is definitely the hardest...it was hard for me, the constant worrying. I have to say, I'm 34+ weeks pregnant and still worry...I think especially for those having gone through IF, anxiety/worry is just part of the package, we've been through so much disappointment. The only advice I can offer is take one day at a time, try to stay positive, and be happy that TODAY you are pregnant.
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  • mikeandangiemikeandangie
    It's all normal. I had no symptoms and was sure the baby had died at each appointment. I am still anxious, since this was not a by-the-book pregnancy. My friends told me that unfortunately, it comes with the territory of being a parent.  Hang in there (((hugs))).
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  • EchloeEchloe
    The thing that helped me most was my doppler. You should be able to use one in a few weeks. Then you can check on baby whenever you need to. But I still worry sweetie. It gets easier when baby moves all the time. Hang in there.
    Beautiful Miracle Baby lost at 21 weeks due to pre-term labor and incompetent cervix. FET#1 BFN, FET#2 BFP, early loss. FET#3 BFN. IVF#2 BFFN. FET #4 BFP after removing bilateral hydrosalpinx and 3 months of lupron depot. Sticky Bun is here!! Image and video hosting by TinyPic Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • Sunshine05Sunshine05 member
    Ditto, Echloe!  Once I got out of first tri, my anxiety went down a little.  Then I waited until 14-15w to get a doppler and that really helped me being able to just do a quick check here or there to ease my nerves.  Now that she's moving, it's much better though still there.  I hope you're able to find a way that works for you to cope with the stress and anxiety.  *hugs*
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  • MyHusbandMyHeroMyHusbandMyHero

    Youre def not crazy! My RE would freak out because before every appt my BP would SKY ROCKET! It would go to 140 or 150/90. I would be ok until the day before the appt then I would start over analyzing every twinge, then the morning of each appt I would go into full on panic.

    Our baby was REALLY behind in measurements at first, and it was really scary. I cant imagine what I would be like with all the bleeding youve had, I bet youre a wreck, i know I would be. I would freak out after every appt that I wouldnt see a hb and thats the first thing I would always make the RE tell me, if there was a hb. I got an at home doppler and I have to say it has given me some peace of mind. On a bad or crampy day I can just listen to her and it eases my mind..

    **Big HUGS!**

    Married November 2007
    DH became a double above knee amputee with traumatic brain injury (TBI) - July 2009
    TTC - August 2009 DX: Severe MFI & TF due to TBI
    DH SA 0 count, started clomid therapy - November 2010
    DH SA 0 count, increased clomid dosage - January 2011
    DH SA 75 million with 60% motility!! - May 2011
    IVF with ICSI ONLY OPTION - May 2011
    3dt of 2 Grade A 8&7 cell embryos May 19, 2011
    +HPT May 30 2011 -- Memorial Day!
    Beta #1 = 34 Beta #2 = 101.8 Beta #3 = 603!
    Expecting beautiful Eden Grace February 7, 2012!
    I don't believe that God ever tells us "no". he has three options. Yes, not right now, or I have something better in mind. We just have to wait & see. BabyFetus Ticker
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