Well I ended up going to my friends BBQ afterall. It went way better than I expected. My girlfriends helped out... like I knew they would. The pool wasn't as chaotic as I anticipated. My DDs were so good. They were the hit of the BBQ. I was actually able to enjoy myself. Yay!

Notes:
Re: Update to missing out...
"Just keep swimming, just keep swimming..."
and
to your gf's for giving you a hand!
a few of my closest friends are w/out kids, so they don't necessarily know what it's like to have them .. (not that I even know about going out w/multiples yet) BUT, they love to see DD and give me a hand and that's part of what makes me love my gf's even more!