Pre-School and Daycare

Still not pottytrained?

DD just turned 3 this month and we are getting ready to enroll her in preschool. We've been trying since she was 18 months to potty train her ( on & off). We got the potty when she first showed interest and she was really getting into it but suddenly decided she didn't want to. We backed off figuring she had plenty of time to get it. Started back up when she was 2. Things were progressing and we thought she was on the right track but then she started throwing fits whenever we'd try and get her to go....so we backed off again. A few months before her 3rd birthday I decided to try yet again. I made a potty chart and started using a timer. Once again she liked it at first, even started telling us sometimes that she needed to go and sometimes told us after she pooped etc. Now she is once again refusing. As in, throwing a fit, crying, refusing to walk etc.

I don't want to push her if she is not ready, that's not going to do anyone any good. However I think she understands the how & why of potty training but she just doesn't WANT to. We had DS 6 months ago and I do wonder if that is part of the issue. Either way I am frustrated and feeling like I'm doing something wrong. Everyone always tells me potty training a girl is super easy....yeah not so much!

Re: Still not pottytrained?

  • I would try the potty watch. I got one and DS1 was pt'd in three days.  Our preschool, you have to be completely PT'd in order to go.  Partly why we can't send DS2 yet.

    I've heard that sometimes kids have problems when they get a new sibling, and they revert back to not wanting to do anything.  Give her time.  Does her preschool help with PT??  If they do, tell them what's going on and have them help you out. : ) 

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  • Potty training is _not_ super easy. 

    We had issues w/each of my LO's... one is 2.5 and the other is 4.5.  What finally ended up working is just putting them in panties or underpants and just letting them be...  no prizes, no timers, no reminding. (for the most part)  I sat them down (at different times, obviously) and said I knew they were big enough to use the potty and we wouldn't be reminding them any more.  The only time I ever reminded them was before longer car trips.  I put a pad on the carseat and kept an extra pad or 2 with me.  I took several sets of extra clothes and just expected accidents.  I usually left them naked in the house.  The hardest part is in the beginning when you have 5 accidents a day and it feels like it just isn't working.  It was really hard not to get frustrated.  With DS, we did this when he was almost 3 so it was only a matter of a few days before he was mostly potty trained.  With DD, it took weeks but slowly improved through time.  I just acted like it was no big deal when they had an accident.  DD is 2.5 and she is still in a pull-up at night.  

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  • imageAlibean:

    Potty training is _not_ super easy. 

    We had issues w/each of my LO's... one is 2.5 and the other is 4.5.  What finally ended up working is just putting them in panties or underpants and just letting them be...  no prizes, no timers, no reminding. (for the most part)  I sat them down (at different times, obviously) and said I knew they were big enough to use the potty and we wouldn't be reminding them any more.  The only time I ever reminded them was before longer car trips.  I put a pad on the carseat and kept an extra pad or 2 with me.  I took several sets of extra clothes and just expected accidents.  I usually left them naked in the house.  The hardest part is in the beginning when you have 5 accidents a day and it feels like it just isn't working.  It was really hard not to get frustrated.  With DS, we did this when he was almost 3 so it was only a matter of a few days before he was mostly potty trained.  With DD, it took weeks but slowly improved through time.  I just acted like it was no big deal when they had an accident.  DD is 2.5 and she is still in a pull-up at night.  

    So when they had an accident did you just change them and start over?

  • I did a modified 3 day PT technique with DD the week before her 2nd birthday, and like PP, I just went straight to panties.  I did not give any rewards, I did not use a timer, and I did not do any of the "extra" stuff.  I simply just put her on the potty every time she had to go, and made a big deal out of her going (clapping and saying good job).  By day 3, she wanted to go so that she could clap and praise herself.  I would be lying if I said it wasn't a journey.  We had a few weeks where she regressed, but we kept her in panties and she eventually went back to her normal routine.

    My children have the same gap as yours (2.5 years exactly), and DD did regress a little big when DS was born.  I did not "force" her to go to the potty, but I did not put her back into a diaper or pull-up either because I did not want to confuse her.  Instead, I started taking her whenever she had to go and praising her for it again.  After a few weeks she was back on track with no problem.

    To be honest, in order for you to train her, you may have to throw out the diapers and go to underwear full time.  Do not switch back and forth, because you will confuse her.  If she has an accident, change her and keep it moving.  I always keep 2 sets of clothes in my car just in case.  Somedays I use both, and some days I don't use either.  It's hit or miss.  Either way, I take her to the potty everytime we leave somewhere, and everytime we arrive somewhere.  That usually cuts down on our runs through the mall and/or Target looking for a restroom.

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  • ditto to abileen! Rowen did not like reminders and timers. He had to do it his way. I said Monday no more diapers and I didn't make a big deal of it. He only had a few accidents and that was it.  


    Rowen Alexander born 10 weeks early 1/28/07

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  • imageIzzlesmom:
    imageAlibean:

    Potty training is _not_ super easy. 

    We had issues w/each of my LO's... one is 2.5 and the other is 4.5.  What finally ended up working is just putting them in panties or underpants and just letting them be...  no prizes, no timers, no reminding. (for the most part)  I sat them down (at different times, obviously) and said I knew they were big enough to use the potty and we wouldn't be reminding them any more.  The only time I ever reminded them was before longer car trips.  I put a pad on the carseat and kept an extra pad or 2 with me.  I took several sets of extra clothes and just expected accidents.  I usually left them naked in the house.  The hardest part is in the beginning when you have 5 accidents a day and it feels like it just isn't working.  It was really hard not to get frustrated.  With DS, we did this when he was almost 3 so it was only a matter of a few days before he was mostly potty trained.  With DD, it took weeks but slowly improved through time.  I just acted like it was no big deal when they had an accident.  DD is 2.5 and she is still in a pull-up at night.  

    So when they had an accident did you just change them and start over?

    That's exactly what we did!  I actually, for the most part, had them clean themselves up.  I just said, "uh-oh" and helped them a little with the clean-up where needed and put them in clean clothes.  No biggie.  Good luck! 

  • Every child is different and if she doesn't want to use the potty, she is not going to - regardless of what you try.  My older DD trained at 2y9m and was totally trained, day and night, 3 weeks later.  My younger DD showed interest at 16 months - would pee on the potty eveyr so often but nothing serious.  At around  2y3m, she was starting to really get the hang of it so we put her into undies.  She did great for a few weeks and then just stopped using the potty.  After a few months in unides and tons of accidents daily, she went back into pull-ups (we did pullup so she could go when she wanted on her own).  She started telling me that she would be trained when she was 3.  Off and on that winter, she would use the potty all the time for a while and then go back to not using it.  Finally a few weeks before her 3rd birthday, she decided she was ready.  She moved to undies and did great.  For a few months after her 3rd birthday, she would have an accident or 2 a week and that was it.  Finally at around 3 y 2 m - she finally was truely potty training, accidents are very rare.  She is not night trained but does wake up dry most of the time.  You can't push it - she gets it and when she is ready, it will happen.  I am sure having a new sibling could be a big part of it with her right now.
    Jenni Mom to DD#1 - 6-16-06 DD#2 - 3-13-08 
  • Thanks for all the feedback ladies! We've switched DD completely over to underwear now and we're going that route.She seems to be doing really well! I feel like I pester her a lot to go and she gets mad at me,lol. But so far she's been doing a great job.
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