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September 2011 Moms
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Found out my mom is throwing me a shower... a little stressed

RobynLovesDanoRobynLovesDano member
in September 2011 Moms

So, I talked to my mom yesterday, and found out she is throwing me a shower when she comes down at the beginning of Oct.  She is inviting a bunch of people who are 'family friends'.  I know them, and saw them a bit growing up, but none of them are people I am close to.  Nor do any of them make an effort to keep in contact with me now.

My points of stress are that I feel like it will be awkward making small talk and receiving gifts from people who don't really know adult me at all.  Also, and this may be a stupid paranoid FTM thing, but I do NOT want a bunch of people passing around my month old baby!  My mom told me last night 'everyone will be so excited to see the baby'.  Thats fine, but in my mind all I could picture was people showing up so they could pass around my very tiny little one.

 I do not have the greatest relationship with my mom, and I know that if I don't just smile and go along with what she wants, it could end badly.  And its not that I don't appreciate the gesture, its very nice that she wants to throw a shower.  But all I can think about is how much I don't want to do this! (which sounds really whiny and selfish)

Any thoughts on a diplomatic way to deal with this?  I have to walk on egg shells around my mom :( 

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Re: Found out my mom is throwing me a shower... a little stressed

  • TchrJen24TchrJen24

    I would let her know your concerns about having that many people around your baby- it's a health concern- you're not being selfish. I would tell her you appreciate the shower, but the baby will spend that day with daddy or something, because you don't want him exposed to that many people that early. Your baby- your choice.

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  • RobotsandRosesRobotsandRoses member
    imageTchrJen24:

    I would let her know your concerns about having that many people around your baby- it's a health concern- you're not being selfish. I would tell her you appreciate the shower, but the baby will spend that day with daddy or something, because you don't want him exposed to that many people that early. Your baby- your choice.

    Ditto. You can say your pediatrician said no groups before the 6 week vaccines or something along those lines. Blame the doctor.

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  • ChiTownMommy1234ChiTownMommy1234
    imageTchrJen24:

    I would let her know your concerns about having that many people around your baby- it's a health concern- you're not being selfish. I would tell her you appreciate the shower, but the baby will spend that day with daddy or something, because you don't want him exposed to that many people that early. Your baby- your choice.

     

    This.   I wouldn't bring the baby.  

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  • KellieD6708KellieD6708 member
    imageRobotsandRoses:
    imageTchrJen24:

    I would let her know your concerns about having that many people around your baby- it's a health concern- you're not being selfish. I would tell her you appreciate the shower, but the baby will spend that day with daddy or something, because you don't want him exposed to that many people that early. Your baby- your choice.

    Ditto. You can say your pediatrician said no groups before the 6 week vaccines or something along those lines. Blame the doctor.

    All of this. You can always blame the doctor. 

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  • MrsM1113MrsM1113
    I may be in the minority here, but I think a baby shower could be fine.  We're having LO's baptism when he's around 6 or so weeks, and we'll be having a big luncheon afterwards.  I'm expecting most of our large family (25-35 people), and it's not really an option to not have the baby there.  Stick out tongue  Feel free to use the pedi excuse- no one would blame you one bit.  If you do bring the baby, try wearing him/her in a sling or moby wrap.  Everyone can still see LO, but it makes it pretty obvious that they should be hands off.  Plus, LO can nurse and sleep without you having to do much- it would be easier to enjoy the shower.  Keep lots of hand sanitizer around, and ask that everyone use it before they even attempt to touch LO. 
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  • JaninneAlvaradoJaninneAlvarado
    I am in the minority as well as I had DS2 out at a month old for a wedding that I was a bridesmaid in. There were tons of people there but my mom kept a bottle of sanitizer and people didn't mind using it before getting a chance to hold my LO for a few seconds. Plus, being that little, baby will sleep a lot and want to eat and need frequent changes. There won't be a TON of time for them to pass around baby and hold baby. It's really up to you though how you feel and what you want to do with your LO. You're the momma, you're the boss!!
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