Hard to remain calm — The Bump
1st Trimester

Hard to remain calm

This is a late-night insomnia post, so sorry if it's rambling...

I know the women who have been on here awhile don't like all the panicking and freaking out on the first tri boards, but seriously...it's so hard to keep perspective. I've been unable to sleep, and I'm having terrible allergies, so I decided to take benadryl. It's on "the list" that my doctor gave me of meds that are fine to take at any time during pg. But of course, there's that note at the bottom of the page that says, "no medication is considered 100% safe." I'm sure it's fine, but it's so difficult - especially this early - to not worry about every little thing. And we all know that worrying is bad for the baby, which just makes us worry more! 

I guess this is mostly a vent, but if anyone has found good ways to just relax and maintain perspective, I would love to hear them! 

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Re: Hard to remain calm

  • I'm a first time mom so I totally know where you are coming from.

    Don't worry about the allergy meds.  I've been doing what I can to avoid taking meds for my allergies but the other night it was so bad I could barely breathe.  I ended up taking a Zyrtec (also on the safe list).

    My doctor said something to me today that made me think.  He said that worrying is futile.  Your body is an amazing thing, it knows what to do to develop your baby.  He said to think of all the babies born to drug-addicted mothers who survive against incredible odds--doing what you can to be healthy and relax, eat properly, and exercise is giving your baby the best possible shot.  Ultimately, if a miscarriage is going to happen, it's going to happen and no amount of worrying about the "what if" is going to change it.

    It's easier said than done, but try to take it easy.  I'm a worrier, but I'm doing my best to just let things go and enjoy this time.

  • As a second time pregnancy mom, I am still nervous about a lot of things. It is totally normal to worry about your baby. Just try to stay as calm as possible and as the pp said, our bodies are an amazing thing. Who cares what other people think. Sharing and asking questions is what this board is for. 
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  • I maintain perspective by knowing that there is only so much I can control. I can follow the guidelines and do my best to have a healthy pregnancy but the truth is that *** happens. Women who do it all right still have complications, miscarriages and children born with disorders.

    I don't stress about a m/c in the first trimester because truthfully they happen and there is really no way to prevent them. Most are due to genetic issues that are incompatible with life. Stressing won't keep things safe. Sure it sucks and I hope it doesn't happen to me, but what can I do other than eat right and take care of myself.

    I was the same way after my son was born. I never freaked out or worried about things like SIDS. I followed all the precautions and recommendation (no crib bumper, baby slept on back in own crib, no lose bedding, toys or blankets in the crib.) Knowing I did everything I could and followed the guidelines gave me piece of mind. Same with pregnancy.

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  • Thank you, those are really helpful responses. I really don't want to be the kind of mom who is constantly on edge, so I need to practice now! It's true, if something bad is going to happen, it's probably going to be something out of my control. I just have to try to enjoy this time, which might seem interminable now but is actually just the blink of an eye in the big picture. Thanks again!
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