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Upstate NY Babies
Do your kids spend the night at your parents, siblings, etc.?
Justin has only spent the night at my Dad and Step-Mom's when I had Dylan. Dylan has never been away from us. I know my family thinks I am WAY overprotective. I worry though about them spending the night, as they are extremely all about me right now. And Justin still wakes up several times a night. I worry that they'll want to come home or cry for us. I also worry about Justin getting out of bed and falling down their stairs. Part of me thinks I created this since we've never had them stay anywhere else. It's also probably a little selfish. I don't want to be away from them. Wow...as I read this back I'm realizing I need to get a grip. I know some parents that leave their kids with their parents a lot. I just wouldn't want to be away from them that much. As it is, I work full-time and only see them a few hours each day during the week.
It really would be good though for my dh and I to have some alone time. My Dad and Step-Mom are watching the boys today and offered to keep them overnight. They made a comment to me yesterdat that I really should let them spend the night. They said they wouldn't care if they had to get up with the boys. I don't know....we'll see.
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Re: Do your kids spend the night at your parents, siblings, etc.?
NO! I have no plan too anytime soon either! I am overprotective and I am selfish! My dad bugs me about it too, but I just laugh it off. My nephews sleep there a lot, R will someday too.....maybe when he is 7. =P
There is no way in heck he will stay with my mom until he can hold his own and be able to report his overnight experience! Her house is tiny and full of clutter, I haven't even been there in over a year and she lives 20 min or less away.
Charlotte has gone to stay with my mom a few times. The first time it was for our anniversary and I had a really hard time with it. It is fine to go out, but when I go to bed, I want her there. I just like her to sleep in our house most. My mom works in a school, so over the summer when she can go there and stay during the week, it is much better. I don't like to miss a weekend with her, because that is the only time I get to spend the whole day with her. If my parents lived closer and I could take her there for an couple hours so I could clean or run errands without taking her in and out, in and out, I might do that. I know my parents LOVE to have her and she is generally a happy, easy going kid, so that makes it easier. Plus she is a good sleeper; if she was still waking in the night, it would probably be a different story.
Now the same is not true with my in-laws. Not that they aren't perfectly capable, but I am just not as comfortable with them watching her. At my house, fine. They will be with her when the new LO comes along. But not at their house.
I think it is good that Charlotte has people that want to be with her and she can feel comfortable being with my parents. It might be different as she gets old, but now she loves to go and stay there, and we spend a lot of time with them anyway, so it makes me happy that she will have a good relationship with her grandparents like I have with mine.
Evan spends the night at my parents house all the time, about once a month or so. He has his own bedroom and crib at their house. It's just easier for them to have him there... then we don't have to worry about coming home too late and them having to stay up and wait for us and drive 20 minutes home at midnight. They are early birds, and rarely stay up past 10, even on weekends!
Of course we miss him, but the alone time is really important to us. And, I love being able to wake up, have (loud) sex and lay in bed for an hour w/out having to worry if Evan is up! We always joke that the best part of date night is sex the next morning!
Plus, my mom and dad love having Evan sleepover. I remember sleeping at my grandma's when I was young and it was always so, so fun. I want Evan to have those memories w/ his grandparents.
My IL's have never had him overnight, but they live 3 hours away. When we go visit for Christmas FIL mentioned he would love to have Evan stay overnight (we stay w/ DH's aunt) so DH and I can go out w/ his brothers. He has a small daybed in the spare room and they have a bed rail because they watch their nieces overnight sometimes (who are 3 and 5) I'd probably be a bit more nervous, but I think we'll give it a try.... the worst that can happen is that he won't sleep, right?!
I know my brother, well really SIL (Evan's godparents) has mentioned she can't wait for him to be able to sleepover... once he's out of his crib. She watches him all the time at our house, so I will be all for it whenever she wants to take him at her house.
Chelsea stayed at my dad's one night last fall. We dropped her off around 7 and picked her up at 10 the next morning, so she wasn't there that long. For a first time, it was enough. She has been bugging him to have a 'sleepover' at his house again, and he has said he wants to but we just haven't set it up yet. With Molly I think I'd wait another year or so. My main concerns are always with babyproofing. Molly gets into EVERYthing.
We have had my dad stay overnight at our house while we've gone away for the night. I am much more comfortable with that. He has stayed with just Chelsea a few times, and about two months ago he stayed with both girls while DH and I met up with friends in NYC for the night. And in two weeks, we'll be going away for two nights for our anniversary!!!
Stella has stayed at my ILs twice and will be staying with them again 2 Tuesdays from now b/c I have to be at the hospital at 6am for my c/s. They have a crib for her and MIL watches her 3 days/week anyway. They all love each other so much it's pretty cool.
I think the 1 reason she doesn't stay over more often is b/c MIL watches her during the week. We don't want to "use" her more than we have to. My parents will babysit, just not overnight. DD isn't as used to them and they don't have the accomodations to keep her overnight
Yeah- Lorenzo has stayed at my SILs a few times- she loves to have him- I always give her pages of notes- LOL and if we lived closer to Binghamton- I would of course let him stay with my cousin's.
My inlaws have watched Lorenzo at my house and never overnight. Although my MIL isnt that old- she just isnt *that* kind of grammy...
I think hell would have to be freezing over for him to stay at my dad's...I love my dad and he's a great poppa but my step monster is super unstable- and I'm not into even taking Lorenzo to houses where people smoke- let alone letting him stay the night...
TTC since 6/2003. m/c 9/14/03 8 weeks, 5 chemical pregnancies, mmc 6/04 12 weeks, Michael born sleeping 5/25/05 at 22weeks always our angel, fought ovarian cancer and won, m/c 4/06 5.2 weeks and 7/07 6.6 weeks,Our Miracle baby girl born 4/8/10,mc 12/18/11 at 5.3 weeks, BFP 10/26/12 dating u/s on 11/8/12 showing a strong heartbeat!EDD July 4,2013. RCS on 6/27. Baby boy in NICU for 8 long and scary days before he was able to come home. We are now a happy family of 4
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If we lived by my family I probably would. I work an overnight shift one weekend a month so I am away from them at night but it's dh putting them to bed. My kids sleep fine when we are at my parents house. the only time ihave ever been away from ethan is in the hospital with sophia. and i have never been away from sophia.
I remember staying at my grandparent's houses and my aunts house. It was always special. We stayed with my one grandma every NYE(b/c my parents worked not went out) and would watch the rose parade together. My mom always asks for ethan to come and stay for a week but that is pushing it.
My older daughter has sleep overs at my parents house all the time. In fact I called my parents today to let them know we had gotten home safe last night from traveling and my dad asked if they could take my daughter overnight. Ummm....don't even have to ask. She LOVES staying with them because they give her all the attention which is tough here sometimes with her sister.
My 10 month old has not been invited to stay with my parents or IL's yet. If they were to offer I would definitely let them. A good night sleep after 10 months sounds like heaven. Next month is our 5 year anniversary so we are going to see if one of our parents will take both kids.
I feel like I am over protective about certain things. I probably wouldn't be too keen on her staying at my siblings house just because he doesn't know their little nuances but parents definitely.
I think you should do it. It would be good for you and your hubby!!
Just Owen. He has asked to go on vacation to my parents house. It is so funny. My parents live 1 hour away so we don't do it very often...maybe 5 or 6 times? He just went on Sunday and stayed until Wednesday. He does VERY well there, and they are totally on the same page with our parenting goals, etc. plus my dad is a doctor. Owen has severe food allergies and while DH's family is all local, they do not get it yet and so they don't even get to babysit (well MIL and SIL for like 2 hours before, but that is it). Mia loves my mom, but she is still very much my other half.