"So is Dad getting his boy this time?"

TinaL99 · August 2011

That was a comment we got while at the store yesterday and it truly annoys me to no end. First of all, I've wanted a boy my whole life until I had DD. Now I look at her and have a hard time imagining having a boy at all. And who says DH even wants a boy? I just feel like it's a terrible thing to say and makes it seem like having a girl is second best to having a boy. How could we not want another little girl after having our beautiful Stella?

Thanks for letting me get that out!

kevinandmonica2011 · August 2011

Some people are so ignorant.

Ashnmike528 · August 2011

AMEN! lol When we told my grandma we were having a girl (DD) she rubbed DH's back and said "well, maybe next time!" I cried for days. I guess boys were valued more back in the day, but I wouldn't change anything! Girls are awesome :-)

NikCole · August 2011

yeah, I hate those comments too. Or if you do have a boy then people will say you have the "perfect family" as if having 2 of the same gender children isn't perfect?! (or one child, or 3 boys etc)

octoberbridesrule · August 2011

Oh that is annoying.

My DH will have two little girls to dance with at their weddings and when I pointed that out to him he got all cute and emotional.

Plus, who says the mom doesn't want a boy for pete's sake?

Seriously, I am just glad DD#1 is healthy and DD#2 looks good so far.

jewelsonu · August 2011

yep i felt the same way with the if it's another boy you'll have to try for a 3rd to get a girl. I would have been happy with another boy

Irisheyes1247 · August 2011

I know Kevin wanted a boy first (and would like it if this baby were a boy, because he does want "his boy") but now that we have Charlotte, he has said he couldn't imagine not having her. I would like to have one of each but I would be overjoyed to have two girls. I think people say those things, but once the little one is here, it is hard to imagine it any other way

sunnygirl05 · August 2011

I can't even tell you how many people have asked me since I've had Dylan if I'm going to try for a girl. This is it for us, but if we were to try again I would be just as happy with another boy!!

TinaL99 · August 2011

NikCole:

yeah, I hate those comments too. Or if you do have a boy then people will say you have the "perfect family" as if having 2 of the same gender children isn't perfect?! (or one child, or 3 boys etc)

Yep, I've gotten that comment too...from my MIL of all people, whom I adore!

And jewels, there's no going for 3 here, my tubes will be tied up nice and tight during my RCS! We'll have the "perfect family", 2 girls or 1 of each.

dle927 · August 2011

TinaL99:
NikCole:

yeah, I hate those comments too. Or if you do have a boy then people will say you have the "perfect family" as if having 2 of the same gender children isn't perfect?! (or one child, or 3 boys etc)

Yep, I've gotten that comment too...from my MIL of all people, whom I adore!

People say this to me ALL.THE.TIME. I always respond, "My family would have been perfect regardless if I had 2 girls or 2 boys too."

BethPSU · August 2011

I hate these comments! People always ask us if we are going to "try for a girl" or they say, well now you HAVE to have a 3rd. We probably are going to have a 3rd, but I think a 3 boys would be awesome. I would love a girl too of course, but my mind expects all boys. I always think it is funny when people have 1 of each and get the "oh the perfect family". I love that my boys have each other as brothers. I generally feel like the bond between brothers and the bond between sisters is stronger than brother/sister combos. Since I have a sister, I feel like if we had a girl I would be sort of sad for her not having a sister. Although, I know she would have 2 amazing older brothers:) I think people just say that stuff to start conversation.

DawnAM · August 2011

That is so rude! At our anatomy scan when we found out we're having a girl, the ultrasound tech asked my husband "are you disappointed?" Um, no. But thanks for that.

June4bride2be · August 2011

But then you go to the library and see a bizarre family with 5 older boys and a baby girl. I am sorry....I just assumed the kept at it until they got a girl. Call me ignorant if you must!

The bizarre part was the names of these poor kids, the plain Jane names the parents had and the way the kids were dressed. Did I share this story with you ladies?

Anywho......with just #2 or #3, I do think that is a poor choice of things to say to a family. I love my boy, and do want another really bad....but if it happens to be a girl I will love her just as much (but she will be wearing a lot of blue, 'cause that is what we have)! hehe

dle927 · August 2011

BethPSU:
my boys have each other as brothers. I generally feel like the bond between brothers and the bond between sisters is stronger than brother/sister combos. Since I have a sister, I feel like if we had a girl I would be sort of sad for her not having a sister. .

This sort of stings a little too.

I grew up with just a sister so I understand the thought process but it's hard to hear when you have a boy and a girl.

ArcticFox · August 2011

Someone said something to me, asking about DH 'dealing' with having two girls and no boys!! .. not only do they assume we want a boy, they assume DH wants a boy so he can put him in a team onsie and baseball cap - and DH and I totally don't like sports (like televised team sports - but we love stuff like running and hiking). People seriously don't think before they speak.

My cousin may have to have selective IVF because her husband has a serious medical issue that would be passed to boys (he almost died from it), so I can only imagine when she has kids, someone makes a comment like that.. because she would be unable to have a boy..

mrsoc · August 2011

jewelsonu:
yep i felt the same way with the if it's another boy you'll have to try for a 3rd to get a girl.

I got this a lot....People just do not think. I feel incredibly blessed to have been able to have 2 healthy pregnancies with 2 healthy kids...end of story.

Telyco · August 2011

dle927:

BethPSU:
my boys have each other as brothers. I generally feel like the bond between brothers and the bond between sisters is stronger than brother/sister combos. Since I have a sister, I feel like if we had a girl I would be sort of sad for her not having a sister. .

This sort of stings a little too.

I grew up with just a sister so I understand the thought process but it's hard to hear when you have a boy and a girl.

People just draw from their own experiences - I have a brother and a sister and am not close with my sister at all, really. So I would say that is not true. Don't let it sting.

We constantly hear how we have "the million dollar family" PLUS they are so close it's "even better!!" Whatever. I forget about it the second the person walks away.

People are always going to say crazy sh!t...at some point ya gotta let it roll off your back and move on or else you'll drive yourself nuts! We're all going to have the family dynamic that we end up with (unless you're paying for some gender selection during IVF) and you'll look back on it like you wouldn't have it any other way.

jnk062602 · August 2011

Telyco:
We're all going to have the family dynamic that we end up with and you'll look back on it like you wouldn't have it any other way.

Yup, this exactly! If I had my choice right from the beginning, we would have had 2 boys. It was because of Ellie and how awesome she is, that I would have been happy with another girl. And bc I do have a great relationship with my sister and wanted her to have that. But I couldn't be more thrilled that we are having a boy. People say all the above mentioned stuff to us with the one of each stuff. NBD.

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