Anyone hyphenating last names?

chulita425 · August 2011

Just wondering if anyone plans on doing this and why? I know a lot of people in Puerto Rico who do this (Im Puerto Rican) but Im just curious to know a real reason why? Is it in case me and my husband divorce lol..joking! I love my maiden name way more then my husbands last name but I doubt he'd be into hyphenating!

zhirsch · August 2011

We definitely aren't. I changed my last name when we got married, so it's a non issue for us anyway, but whenever I see a kid with a hyphenated last name I can't help but wonder what happens when they marry another person with one. When Julie Smith-Jones and David Harper-Cross have a kid do we get Tommy Smith-Jones-Harper-Cross? When does it end? I like a family to have the same last name.

chulita425 · August 2011

Lol that is so true. I have a few married friends who just took the husbands last name, not the maiden name. I hope that makes sense, ugh so confusing! If they were Harper- Cross they just took the Cross.

laurynfaerie · August 2011

Apparently long before I ever got married I promised my dad I'd hyphenate my last name. He's the last of that branch of the family tree with my maiden (after my sister and cousin get married). That was until I married a guy with a 16 letter last name. My maiden name is 8 letters.

And to the PP wondering about hyphens marrying hyphens, usually the woman doesn't hypenate and just takes her husbands last name. That's what my BFF plans on doing.

Also, I know some people hyphenate when they have children before marriage/from previous marriage, so that they have the same last name as their kids

Cilley · August 2011

No hyphenating last names here. Since the day I got married, I have been using my married name. So will our children. I don't have a problem with others doing it. I do have an issue when parents make up a last name that is a blend of both last names, but isn't one or the other.

NurseLaLa · August 2011

Personally, I see name hyphenating as sort of crapping on centuries-worth of tradition. A man's lineage is what is passed on.

Family trees exist so we don't have to hyphenate :P

prism207 · August 2011

NurseMom1:
Personally, I see name hyphenating as sort of crapping on centuries-worth of tradition. A man's lineage is what is passed on.
Family trees exist so we don't have to hyphenate :P

There are other traditions where this is not the case, you do know that, right?

jsjrol · August 2011

My parents hyphenated my last name....(mother's last name - father's last name). It was such a pain in the butt my whole life and it never fit on health cards, credit cards etc. Plus when I was older and dating, people thought that I had been previously married. Also because my last name was so long I have never had a middle name. Needless to say when I married I could not wait to take my husbands name!

mabma80 · August 2011

I'm from Costa Rica and the women keep their maiden name, and just add on their married one. Do the same on the children's birth certificates. I told this to DH in the beginning and he wasn't game on it. I told him that is my culture and that's that.

So, on our kids' birth certs. they have my maiden name and DH's name. BUT in every day life (ie. school, work, etc.) they will only use DH's name. Same with me. I used my Dad's name my whole life (I have a very long name). : )

Jason'swife · August 2011

Hyphenated names drive me crazy. I'd never consider it.

chulita425 · August 2011

Ah ok I was just curious =] I never really knew why people do it but to each his own!

NurseLaLa · August 2011

prism207:

NurseMom1:
Personally, I see name hyphenating as sort of crapping on centuries-worth of tradition. A man's lineage is what is passed on.
Family trees exist so we don't have to hyphenate :P
There are other traditions where this is not the case, you do know that, right?

Nope! Must be the area that I'm from, but that's what is so great about the Internet. You learn new things. I see hyphenation as a relatively new thing where I am.

JhawkCE · August 2011

I did not change my name and our kids will have my last name as a middle name.

liv97 · August 2011

NurseMom1:
Personally, I see name hyphenating as sort of crapping on centuries-worth of tradition. A man's lineage is what is passed on.
Family trees exist so we don't have to hyphenate :P

this is one of the stupidest things I've read on here.

we hyphenate, and hasn't been an issue so far. our kids can do whatever they want when they get married.

uberbitter · August 2011

We're not hyphenating, and I kept my maiden name. LO will likely have my last name as a matter of practicality - mine is short and easy, while his is long, lacking in vowels, and doesn't fit on standardized forms.

shnookel42 · August 2011

I hyphenated my last name after marriage, but my children will have my husbands last name.

chulita425 · August 2011

JhawkCE:
I did not change my name and our kids will have my last name as a middle name.

I like that idea. I have an aunt who did that, if my last name would sound good as a middle name I would go for it !!

beautiflaw · August 2011

I am. I kept my name and just added his and I am doing the same with the baby. DH told me, "Its your name you can do whatever you want with it."

My reasons for keeping my own name are because I like my name. I saw my marriage as adding him to my life, not taking it over. Which is why I simply added on an extra name.

For the baby it is because we want her name to be the same as mine, we like the way it sounds, and because when she gets older she has more choices in how people address her. If she wants to go by just her dad's name she can, she can use both, or she can use mine. It will up to her.

Kitty Holland · August 2011

NurseMom1:

Personally, I see name hyphenating as sort of crapping on centuries-worth of tradition. A man's lineage is what is passed on.

Family trees exist so we don't have to hyphenate :P

Wow.

Your facts are wrong. Go back a few centuries in England and you'll learn that the name taken was the name of the higher ranking family. And in many different cultures the last name is not "traditionally" just de facto the husband's given name. Just because you know no different does not mean that's just how it is and how it's always been. For example, the naming traditions in Central and South America would blow your mind. And those is Russia would make your head explode.

And you know that this "tradition" comes from a place where women were literally considered property right?

Idomoodou2 · August 2011

I hyphenated my last name after marriage (for many different reasons, some emotional, some practical, some just silly). We talked for maybe 7 seconds about us hyphenating our chidlren's names as well, but my full last name (well my whole name) is FREAKISHLY long and I didn't want to have to saddle a child with having to spell a 15 letter last name on top of what ever name we choose to give him.her. That being said we live in a highly Puerto Rican populated area and that seems to be a pretty common thing here. But i'm jealous because latin sounding names usually sound reallly nice together, where as our german/scottish names can sound kind of odd.

Corbin30 · August 2011

I have a hyphenated name. When I was born, I went by my father's last name. He walked out when I was 5. When I was 9 my mom remarried and we all took my step-fathers name. Well, he turned out to be an @sshole. When I went to basic training I went back to my fathers last name, hating every moment of it (hadn't seen him in 13 years). I got married at 19 and took my husbands name. I reconciled with my father at 23. My father died when I was 25. I got divorced at 26, and took my mothers name, hyphenated with my fathers name. When I got remarried, I kept my name.

None of my children share my name. I am ok with that. This baby will have DH's last name, which is fine. It was important to him, and not very important to me. It doesn't matter if you all have the same name, or if you have the same name all your life, or anything. I have never understood how this gets to be such a hot-button issue.

Diamond Momma · August 2011

I grew up with both my parents last names. Although it was a pain in the ass at times I appreciate both the names. My fiance doesnt want our child to have both so out of respect im giving our child my fathers last name as a middle name.

Next child will have my mothers.

When my fiance and I get married Im not sure if Ill be taking his last name or not.

whatever the choice you make its nobodys business but your own!

bosjack · August 2011

I am the last in my family's branch and its my mom's maiden name. "Dad" wasn't in the picture. Its my way of honoring my family's name one last time. I added on DH last name to mine. I typically sign both names and on some accounts its required that both names be there. It doesn't bother me. DH has a difficult to pronounce last name. I answer to my maiden name which is usually followed by either a long pause with a look of confusion or Bo.......... and a look of confusion. My children have DH last name. Most people (non-friends or non-close associates) only know me by DH last name. IMHO, there is only confusion when people don't use their heads and assume things.

Ms.Jade · August 2011

I hyphenated when I married DH. I love still having the same last name as my family. Especially my nephews. DH has one nephew and I have one. When they were 4 they liked to call me Auntie Smith-Jones. They share me. It's super cute. My sis also hyphenated and I like that on wedding programs, facebook, etc. it's clear we're sisters. It would be so weird to have her be Amber Carter and me be Candice Jones. We're Amber Smith-Carter and Candice Smith-Jones. I'm really close to my family so this was important for me.

When I married DH he told me he wouldn't be comfortable just trashing the name he'd had all his life and taking on a new one so he didn't expect me to. Gotta love progressive men...

Our kids will have his last name only and I will use his last name in social situations. My child's friends will just call me Ms. (yes I said Ms.) Jones for example. Hyphenating the kids makes no sense to me.

MBNB · August 2011

I am pro-hyphenation all the way! We did it, love it, have no regrets. I hyphenated when I got married and our children have my same last name, hyphen and all. It was the right decision for us. Have no idea why people have issue with it, the whole "family history--man's history" crap is ridiculous. We had our reasons for it and I am super proud of our choice!

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