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Preemies
BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11
BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12
Are your parents getting the whooping cough vaccine? LONG IL vent included, with lots of backstory
DH's parents are 63. My parents at 69.
We are preparing to visit both sets of parents in September who live a 5 hour plane flight away in CA (which is one of the three states that has a high outbreak of whooping cough). There will be a mini-family reunion (my parents and siblings), and then we will go visit DH's parents and his sister (who lives with MIL....MIL and FIL do not live together, but they live in the same subdivision). We will be staying with my parents for about 2 weeks, and DH's MIL for 5 days.
We will also be flying out to stay with DH's family over Christmas for a week.
I sent out a mass email to my parents, DH's parents, my siblings and DH's sister saying:
"The dr has advised us to ask anyone who is going to be holding/around Corinne for any length of time to be up to date on their Tdap shots. Tdap means tetanus, diphtheria and acellular pertussis. With whooping cough running rampant in CA, if Corinne were to get this, it would mean much more trouble than if a normal, term-born baby got it.
So, in anticipation of her being passed around like a bowl of chips, please consider getting vaccinated 
Your GP dr can vaccinate you, or you can get vaccinated for this at your local drug store (here, it costs around $40). "
My siblings and parents all got vaccinated. However, DH's family is having a hard time with this request.
SIL has liver disease, so she says she can't get vaccinated. OK....we'll deal. She rarely goes out in public, and is not around germy kids, so it is what it is. SIL is upset that I asked her to get vaccinated and thinks that I won't let her see Corinne because she's not vaccinated...I don't know where she got this from...but whatevs.** She called DH complaining about this.
**SIL is a bit weird about this stuff...she infers a lot of things that just aren't there. For instance, in the NICU 2 days after Corinne was born, I was talking to SIL on the phone. The dr came into the room, so I told SIL "I gotta go". SIL thought that I was mad at her because I got off the phone so abruptly. Then, last Christmas when we were staying with them, I borrowed SIL's pen (it was sitting on the dining room table) and used it (I returned it to the table after I was done). She was pissed at me because I didn't ask to use her pen (I had no idea it was hers) before I used it. Each time, instead of complaining to me (the "source" of her discontention), she complains to DH.
MIL said that she was recommended to NOT get the vaccine, and she doesn't see why we want her to get the vaccine, and not other people. We stayed with DH's aunt and uncle for one night, allowing DH's aunt and uncle to hold Corinne and didn't ask that the aunt and uncle get vaccinated before they did (we did make sure that they weren't ill in the week before we visited, and employed frequent hand washing). Therefore, since we didn't require DH's aunt and uncle to get vaccinated, and since we are going on the plane, she thinks that it is out of line that we ask HER to get vaccinated, and not other people. (I honestly have no idea if aunt and uncle are vaccinated....they have an infant grandson, so who knows.) MIL is anti-doctors and thinks it would be a huge hassle to go to her dr and get vaccinated.
I can understand (in a way) where she is coming from...that Corinne could get sick from someone on the plane, or anyone who comes in contact with her (ie the grabby stranger who reaches into the grocery basket to touch her hand at the grocery store, for instance), or anyone who holds her for a minute (like a friend of ours). Understandable, but I'm miffed that she thinks this is a good reason why SHE should not bother getting vaccinated. It's a cheap shot (heck, I'd even pay for it), and I fail to see why a person would not want to get it, if it could provide an extra layer of protection to their only grandchild. If she gets vaccinated, then FIL will. If she doesn't, then FIL won't.
MIL said that because she is over the age 60, her dr said that she shouldn't get vaccinated. Does anyone know why age would play a factor? Are your parents getting vaccinated? My parents are older than MIL, and still got vaccinated....
BFP #1 via IUI ~ L (Fatal Birth Defect) 4/7/10
BFP #2 via IUI ~ m/cBFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11
BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Are your parents getting the whooping cough vaccine? LONG IL vent included, with lots of backstory
My parents didn't get vaccinated but they do not live in a high risk area. Me, DH and our caregiver have been vaccinated.
That said, if I asked my parents to get vaccinated, they would do it.
The whole "she could get exposed to it on the plane" argument is very annoying to me. I heard the same thing from my in-laws when we visited them this summer. I asked that none of the younger children touch the boys and everyone was eye-rolling etc. and said "well, were there kids on the plane?"
My point is that yes, there are many things we can't control. But one thing we can control is that we can take precautions with our own families.
I'm sorry your in-laws are being jerks about this. Maybe you should offer to have your MIL speak to your pediatrician?
My parents and MIL are all over 60. They all got the shot. We brought Finn home last year in Nov. If you did not have a Tdap or a Flu shot you were not allowed in the house. Period. End of Story.
My parents got everything no problem. My MIL pitched a fit, not sure why, but in the end she got it because she knows I was not kidding. The Tdap is recommended for everyone who will spend time around newborns, preemies or not.
Both my parents and DH's parents got TDap while the boys were still in the hospital at our request. We live close to both sides of our family and since I SAH they are our go-to caregivers when we need it so they spend a lot of time around the babies.
We are hosting all holidays this year so we have control over who is in the environment (if they want to do their own thing too thats fine by me but we will celebrate at our house).
My parents and ILs are all over 60 and all got the whooping cough vaccine last year as soon as Kevin was born. I'll be insisting on the flu vaccine this year too.
The one who gives me trouble is my sister - I have to remind her again that she needs to get it. She's a bit anti-vaccine but she's coming around. Since she lives abroad it hasn't been that big of a deal but we may be going there for Christmas (I realize that sounds insane now as I type this).
Both sets of parents and all of our siblings got the shot. Knowing a tiny bit about your H's family, I am not surprised.
We basically said, no shot = no seeing the baby.
It isn't that people over 60 don't need the vaccine. It is that the likelihood that they had whooping cough is great, and therefore they have the immunity. However, I wouldn't trust that. If she had whooping cough when she was 5-10 years old, there have been a lot of mutations in the virus since then.We'll miss you sweet Debbie Girl (4.21.12) and sweet Cindy Girl (8.9.12)
My ILs doctor suggested they get the shot, they won't. My doctor put her foot and said they had to have it. They still haven't gotten. We've offered to pay for it, they won't get it. The home care family I'm a nurse for got it, just so I "don't bring it home". And my ILs won't get the shot *sigh* I feel your pain.
I hope they get it, if just for your peace of mind! GL!