I know this will be different if they live hours away, but if you live reasonably close to your parents and ILs, how often do they see you and LO? Do you go over there or do they come to you? What would be ideal? I just didn't realize how much of an issue it was that grandparents feel they have this "right" to see LO whenever.
I SAH right now, so I am lucky to see LO so much, but I feel like DH, DS, and I hardly get any family time. He doesn't get home until 7 a lot of nights (works till 6 usually and we live an hr away). LO is a night owl, so he gets to hang out a few hours, but that time is spent with him watching Linus so I can hurry and cook dinner, do dishes, take care of the horses, get a shower, etc. etc. so it's not exactly quality time. Then the weekend comes... His parents have started this habit of coming over every single Saturday. Many times his dad will help him with something around the house (we're going to be selling our house in the spring hopefully) which is helpful, but they are here ALL day usually. It's tiring honestly. By the time we get up and around it's noon and they're here and then often not leaving until 7 or so. I don't want them to not see Linus, but I feel like there aren't enough hours in the week. My mom comes over during the day often to see Linus which is nice since DH isn't home yet. Then my dad doesn't want to come over so feels like we need to bring Linus to him which is annoying. So many weekends his parents are over on Saturday and we're at mine on Sunday. I feel like we're just constantly "on" and can't relax together.
I know I have the right to just say "no", but I DO want Linus to be close to his grandparents. I guess it's also just hard because Linus honestly just really doesn't see to take too well to MIL and FIL. I don't know why, but a lot of times he just looks at them and cries. So it's stressful.