you cry hysterical in a dressing room because you refuse to go up another size because of all the weight you have gained.
In the past two years, I have gained about 20 pounds. 10 of it was in the last five months. I have jumped up two sizes since last fall and now another one tonight. I just don't know how I let myself get like this. I am pertrified to go a work cookout this weekend this heavy and get some "oh you're pregnant" comments.
What is your "you know you're an infertile when" moment?
Re: You know you're an infertile when...
When I walk around Target cursing anyone with a baby or that is pregnant. And especially if they have a few children (I swear one week all I saw was families with 4 or 5 kids when I was at Trader Joe's). The ugly green monster is a frequent visitor for me.
April 2013 DE IVF= BFN
September 2013 DE IVF (Fingers Crossed) = BFFFN! again...
October 2013 FET of our last 2 = Beta Hellzz for 6-7 Weeks. M/C
2/10 & 3/10 Clomid 50mg-BFN
5/10-Lap Surgery for Stage 2 Endo
3/11-IUI#1 with Follistim and Menopur-developed mild OHSS= BFN
6/11-IUI#2 with Follistim -developed moderate OHSS= BFN!
7/11-FSH-11, AMH 1.6
9/11-ttc naturally with positive thoughts
10/6/11-POSITIVE pregnancy test!!! 15dpo BETA-220
6/14/2012- Riley Harper arrived!! We love our little girl
<a href="http://s532.photobucket.com/albums/ee324/exploshidad/?action=view
I am right there with you. I gained 30lbs since my wedding last June. It's so hard because I stopped working out and am an emotional eater. Trying to get myself back together now.
My infertile moment was when I freaked out at friends(2 couples) who were discussing whether their husbands should get vasectomies bc they are so fertile right in front of me (they were well aware I was about to do IVF). Really, people?
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
Oh I hate this too!! I swear I will see a parking space and then see the d@mn sign and I either get pissed off or feel really, really sad. Not that I begrudge those spaces existing, I just feel like it will never be me that gets to park there.
This totally cracked me up!! I will think of this whenever I see that sign now :-)
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
Lol! Secretly, I park in those spots all the time, just because! Isn't that terrible?
2/10 & 3/10 Clomid 50mg-BFN
5/10-Lap Surgery for Stage 2 Endo
3/11-IUI#1 with Follistim and Menopur-developed mild OHSS= BFN
6/11-IUI#2 with Follistim -developed moderate OHSS= BFN!
7/11-FSH-11, AMH 1.6
9/11-ttc naturally with positive thoughts
10/6/11-POSITIVE pregnancy test!!! 15dpo BETA-220
6/14/2012- Riley Harper arrived!! We love our little girl
<a href="http://s532.photobucket.com/albums/ee324/exploshidad/?action=view
You want to hide in your house, because someone at a family party always says something offensive and stupid.. Even though they know about my IF and IVF cycles.
So that has made me hateful and I don't want to say something I will regret later. So I just don't go to family gatherings lately.
2/06 - surprise pregnancy - twins
3/06 - m/c 1st baby at 6 weeks
5/06 -2nd baby had no heartbeat at 14 wks.
D&E - Bled out. Blood transfusions. Week in ICU - Cheated Death!
Diagnosis: Blood clotting and bleeding disorder, immune issues, & cervical stenosis
5/10 - 1st IVF cycle - BFN
FET - 10/12/10 - BFN
1/11 - IVF with PGD - BFN
IVF - May - BFN
6/11 New RE - fingers crossed!
9/11 - IVF - 4 transferred
10/13 - BFP!!
It's a boy! Clint Michael, Due in June!!!
What are they going to do, make you pee on a stick to prove it? I might pass it if I have a trigger shot in my system!
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
Me too!! And it will make me giggle!!!
2/06 - surprise pregnancy - twins
3/06 - m/c 1st baby at 6 weeks
5/06 -2nd baby had no heartbeat at 14 wks.
D&E - Bled out. Blood transfusions. Week in ICU - Cheated Death!
Diagnosis: Blood clotting and bleeding disorder, immune issues, & cervical stenosis
5/10 - 1st IVF cycle - BFN
FET - 10/12/10 - BFN
1/11 - IVF with PGD - BFN
IVF - May - BFN
6/11 New RE - fingers crossed!
9/11 - IVF - 4 transferred
10/13 - BFP!!
It's a boy! Clint Michael, Due in June!!!
LOL! I have thought about it too! Like. Really? How are you going to say I am NOT?
April 2013 DE IVF= BFN
September 2013 DE IVF (Fingers Crossed) = BFFFN! again...
October 2013 FET of our last 2 = Beta Hellzz for 6-7 Weeks. M/C
i do that too... i know a seventeen year old who doesnt have a diploma, a job, a place of her own etc and she got pregnant on purpose... ypu have no idea how much i wanted to say it to her and every other fourteen to seventeen year old girl who has gotten pregnant with no concept of what it really means to be a mother... ugh green is really not my shade is it....
I park in them after transfer without even a shred of remorse. Pregnant until proven otherwise. It's a perk!
Friends for 15 years. Married 8. TTC since January 2009
2010 Diagnosis: Anovulation and Severe MFI
2011 Treatment:
IVF w/ICSI #1 Antagonist: 2 blasts - c/p - BFN 04.22
FET #1: 1 blast/1 early blast - BFP 06.22 - m/c 06.30 @6w0d
07-11 RPL: MTHFR C677T Heterozygous & Slightly elevated ACLA IgM
FET #2: 1 morula - BFN: 9.02
January '12: IVF #2
Started BCP and Metformin (New!) 12-14 for stimming in January
Dum spiro, spero.
?SAIF/PAIF/PgAL/PAL always welcome?
When you cry hysterically if anything baby related is mentioned. We just had a family reunion last weekend and I can't even count how many of my YOUNGER cousins is pregnant or already has kids. The fam keeps asking me when I will have one... My mother was good though, she would drag me out of those conversations or change subject.
And I hear you about weight gain! I gained a good 15 lbs after finding out about our MFI. I lost it (and then some) but once we started IUIs and getting BFNs, I am slowly but surely getting it back.
TTC since March/April 2010
DX: MFI - less than 1 million sperm, 26% motility
DH put on anastrozole to increase counts
June/July 2011 100 mg Clomid + TS IUI#1 & IUI 2 - BFN :-(
Forced break due to DH getting spinal surgery in August 2011
IVF - January 2012: BFN
FET in April 2012 - BFP at 6dp5dt! Beta #1 at 9dp5dt: 82.5, Beta #2 at 12dp5dt: 352 Beta #3 at 19dp5dt: 6000, saw heartbeat and one little bean at 5W6D!
After nearly 3 years of waiting our LO was born December 18th 2012!
Me: 36, DH: 42
Dx: DOR and MFI
DH: low count + very low motility; hormones all normal; Sperm DNA Frag. test = poor to fair; male karyotyping normal
Me: FSH 13.4 + AMH 0.26 + hypothyroidism; Scratch the hypothyrodism (?); Blood clotting and immune panel all negative; endometrial biopsy normal
IVF #1 (MDLF - Jul/Aug 2011): BFN (9R, 5M, 3F with ICSI, 3dt of 1 10-cell grade 2, no frosties)
IVF #2 (EP-antagonist - Sep/Oct 2011): BFN (6R, 4M, 3F w/ ICSI, 3dt of 1 6-cell, 1 7-cell, grade 4s, no frosties)
DE IVF #1 (shared cycle - June 2012): c/p (6R, 6F w/ICSI, 3dt 1 8-cell grade A- and 1 7-cell grade A-; no frosties)
DE IVF #2 (shared cycle with new donor - Nov/Dec/ 2012): - BFP!!!!! 12/14/12. U/S on 12/27 shows twins!!!!!
SAIFW/PAIFW
Me: 32 - Stage II Endo / DH: 36 - Low count and morphology (1%)
IUIs 1-3 BFN, lap Dec. 2010, IUIs 4-6 BFN
IVF w/ICSI #1 - ER 2/8: 24R 19M 9F ET 2/13 2-5 day blasts (no frosties) = BFP - b/g twins!
E & C Born 10/19/2012
Moving forward with Adoption 2017!
LOL!! I have certainly given these the "eye roll" before!
Moving forward with Adoption 2017!
I do the same thing and actually got called out by a pregnant woman. I had just received my negative beta and shouted back that after all the fertility drugs I deserve a break from walking far. I believe I also called her some bad names.
3 IUI's w/Clomid & Ovidrel=all BFNs
3 IVF (2 Fresh, 1 frozen) =BFN
Jan 2012 New RE & Fresh Cycle =BFP!
This is great!
3 IUI's w/Clomid & Ovidrel=all BFNs
3 IVF (2 Fresh, 1 frozen) =BFN
Jan 2012 New RE & Fresh Cycle =BFP!
Love this!!!!
2/10 & 3/10 Clomid 50mg-BFN
5/10-Lap Surgery for Stage 2 Endo
3/11-IUI#1 with Follistim and Menopur-developed mild OHSS= BFN
6/11-IUI#2 with Follistim -developed moderate OHSS= BFN!
7/11-FSH-11, AMH 1.6
9/11-ttc naturally with positive thoughts
10/6/11-POSITIVE pregnancy test!!! 15dpo BETA-220
6/14/2012- Riley Harper arrived!! We love our little girl
<a href="http://s532.photobucket.com/albums/ee324/exploshidad/?action=view
Beta #1 (9.15.11) ~ 437!!! Beta #2 (9.19.11) ~ 1,854!!! EDD 05.24.2012 TWINS!!!
Make a pregnancy ticker
12dp5dt: 765; 15dp5dt: 1979; 17dp5dt: 3379...TWINS!!!!!
Our perfect baby boys were born at 36w1d!!
LOL, I definitely know what you mean...that feeling that everyone knows you're a fraud.
When you hear that your friend's dog is going to have puppies, instead of squealing "awww, puppies!!!" you mutter "well it sure was easy for her to get knocked up." Yes, I've been jealous of pregnant animals
Lol damn those b*tches in heat!
When I didn't want to hang out with friends of ours because the wife conceived spontaneously at the age of 37.
Seriously. This.
I remember a post here awhile ago where the question was about the craziest thing we've done to get pregnant, and someone replied, "Sex."
but why wouldn't the doctor want you to have sex? Is that because you could conceive 'spontaneously'? Why would that be a bad thing? I don't understand that statement.
She is overstimulated and runs the risk of HOM if she goes through with the IUI or intercourse. That's how Kate + 8 wound up with her sextuplets.
Me: 32 - Stage II Endo / DH: 36 - Low count and morphology (1%)
IUIs 1-3 BFN, lap Dec. 2010, IUIs 4-6 BFN
IVF w/ICSI #1 - ER 2/8: 24R 19M 9F ET 2/13 2-5 day blasts (no frosties) = BFP - b/g twins!
E & C Born 10/19/2012
Oh, sorry...I didn't make that clear. I overresponded, so they told us the risk for high order multiples was too high. Dr. said my ovaries "went crazy, like Mardi Gras crazy." Lovely.
Love the "sex" comment. If this works, I want to tell my children that they should never ever have sex, because you don't need it to make babies.
12dp5dt: 765; 15dp5dt: 1979; 17dp5dt: 3379...TWINS!!!!!
Our perfect baby boys were born at 36w1d!!
This just made me choke on my coffee!!
IVF #1-July 2011 7/9/11-Started Stims
7/20/11-ER:No eggs in 4/5 follicles. Left the 5th follie intact and converted to an IUI
8/3/11-Beta #1=BFN,
Nov, 2011 BFP #1=m/c at 7 wks 3 days
11/11-AMH .47, IVF #2 March 2012...or not!! Surprise BFP on 2/19. Beta #1=161. Beta #2 305 Our little miracle girl is on her way! Due Oct 29, 2012
<a href="http://s1207.photobucket.com/albums/bb461/andersenspics/?action=view
You travel an extra 20 mintues to a grocery store in the city so you can avoid the one in your suburb that is always filled with the most adorable young families.
You curse under your breath at Target's baby section. Why does that stuff have to be so cute?
You rotate pharmacies so you don't start to be recognized as the girl who's constantly buying OPKs/HPTs.
When people ask you when you're going to get on the "baby train," you glare at them and ask them if they limit themselves to asking only awkward questions.
Mild MFI, irregular cycles, HSG only showed left tube open
IUIs #1-3: Femara -- BFN
IUI #4: Follistim + HCG boosters -- BFN
Sept./Oct. 2011 IVF#1: Long Lupron, 3dt of 2 -- BFN + 1 frostie
Surprise BFP 11.21.2011: missed m/c at 9w2d, D&C 12.27.2011
The Blog
I have another one that also happened to me...
When you go on FB and contemplate "un-hiding" someone you hid a little over a year ago for their annoying and in-your-face pregnancy-related posts and ultrasound profile pix, but then realize you have to keep them hidden because they are pregnant again and doing the same annoying crap!
Hahaha, agreed! My sister recently adopted a stray cat that was -- oops -- pregnant. I actually had a jealous moment there. What kind of insanity does it take to be jealous of a stray cat???
Mild MFI, irregular cycles, HSG only showed left tube open
IUIs #1-3: Femara -- BFN
IUI #4: Follistim + HCG boosters -- BFN
Sept./Oct. 2011 IVF#1: Long Lupron, 3dt of 2 -- BFN + 1 frostie
Surprise BFP 11.21.2011: missed m/c at 9w2d, D&C 12.27.2011
The Blog
OMG! It's horrible! I've had that happen numerous times!
I've gained 15lbs since February.
I used to be a size 0, and now I'm a size 4. It's ALL in my stomach, and I get asked that ALL the time. I want to punch people for being so stupid!
15 treatment cycles: four early m/c
Moving forward with domestic infant adoption!
Home study approved 5/13, now just waiting...