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Toddlers: 12 - 24 Months
wolverine8
member
q for working moms: would you still work if you didn't have to?
wolverine8
member
I'm a full time working mom and I love what I do. I work at a fantastic hospital and we thankfully have a wonderful daycare for DS 3 days a week. I have to work, though. My husbands income is not enough for us to live off of alone and honestly, even if we could, I would still choose to work part time. I love feeling like I still have an identitiy outside of being a mom and wife. I have a lovely network of friends at work and come home every night feeling like I've accomplished something. I'm just curious if I'm the only one out there who would do this? And yep I'm working on a quiet Saturday morning. Time for coffee. 
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Re: q for working moms: would you still work if you didn't have to?
This exactly! I love by job (teaching) but would love to be able to have the choice of staying home.
This. I taught PT for the past 2 years and I thought it was a nice balance. The only downside was that I didn't always hear work info right away or at all because people forget what days I'm there vs. the days my partner teacher was there. But I loved the fact that when I would have a really bad day with DD I could look forward to "getting away" the next day. I could never be a FT SAHM but working FT doesn't sound as great as it used to be. Unfortunately I have to go back to FT this Fall.
Yep. I think the fact that I don't have a choice makes it easier emotionally. I certainly love the days off I do have with my family.
I love my job as a special ed teacher and have been teaching for 12 years. I do however love staying home with my DD when it's summer break or days off.
We can't live on my DH's salary alone so I have to work. My DD goes to grandma's but I still feel bad leaving her.
A summer off would be so nice! You still have your work but then you get to make all those awesome summer memories with your family. We try to get out as much as possible when I'm not working so that we're still doing fun things.
I had 12 weeks off and then went right back to work full time. It's hard but it does get easier. Just make sure you find an awesome daycare/sitter whom you trust and whom your children really like. My DS loves his daycare and they care about him so much. If we had daycare issues then we'd find a way for me to not work until we found the perfect place.
We had a nanny from 3 months when I went back to work until he was a year. I found a home daycare that is perfect for our family! He LOVES it there. We were on vaca for 10 days and he couldn't stop hugging the sitter and the other kids when he went back. And the sitter and the kids adore him. You are right though, having a daycare you feel comfortable with makes a huge difference!
TTC #1- unexplained...lost left ovary 4/07 IUI #1 2/10/09-BFN IUI #2 3/5/09-BFN IVF # 1-BFP
TTC#2- FET 4/7/11 BFP, Natural mc 5/5/11 IVF#2 ER 9/13/11, ET 9/16/11, Beta #1 9/27/11 BFP 254 Beta #2 9/30/11 793 -Twins!
I work an average of 32 hours a week. Ideally I would like to work 24 hours a week. I plan to cut back at least one shift and hopefully 2. We could swing it, but it would mean less going into our savings per month. I like working and can't imagine myself being a SAHM full time, even if we could. I am an RN so I also would worry what effect being out of practice would have by staying at home.
I enjoy being with other professionals and growing and learning in my job every day. I also enjoy having breaks and some peace and quiet. I work on a psych unit and it is surprisingly more quiet and relaxing than home! My co-workers and I have a lot of fun at work and I would really miss that.
I HAVE to work f/t to provide for DD and myself and carry insurance for myself. If I lose my job, I know DD will have Medicaid, but I wouldn't have any insurance. I'm on 3 different daily medications, so that just would not be good. If I had the option of being a SAHM, I probably wouldn't take it. I need to have my own money.
Things have been tough at work recently, and it is possible that come spring I won't have a job. If that happens I'm going to do school f/t online (currently going p/t online) and get a p/t night job waitressing or something so that DD will be at home with me during the day, and either SO or my parents in the evening.
I have to work for one year and 102 days for my pension to kick in, and I am counting the days. Right now, I am essentially working for my pension and to save enough money so we can buy a new house and get out of this house (we are underwater). It also buys us a little more time for DH to move up the ladder which would make life more comfortable. After that, I intend to take a few years off and we will see what happens.
I am not sure if my desire to SAH is due to simply wanting more time with my DS, or because I am so burnt out from my job teaching in an inner-city school district. I have dealt with a lot of crap working for such a dysfunctional district, and it has really turned me off to my chosen profession. I don't think I could take my mom's path of being a permanent SAHM, but I can definitely see myself taking several years off while my babies are young.
I've been both a working mom and a SAHM, so I will answer. I voluntarily returned to work when my son was 6 months old. He was a very difficult, colicky baby and I had really bad PPD. Going back to work was very good for me and I enjoyed taking a break from being just a mom all day. I felt like when I returned home at the end of the day I was refreshed and had more energy and patience.
Because of the turn in the economy, we had to move from South Florida back to NYC and I became a SAHM again because between the cost of daycare and my commute to work, it would actually cost more for me to work here that it does for me to stay home. Since having my DD I would not want to return to work until my kids are school aged. My son has calmed down a lot and it is a real pleasure watching him grow from a baby into a little boy and I'm glad I can be the one to take him to and from preschool everyday and I can be part of all of his activities. DD is literally the world's easiest baby, so I just love being with her all day long.
Charlotte Ella 07.16.10
Emmeline Grace 03.27.13
BFP May 2017.
BFP November 2011 TWINS!!!. Lost a twin at 7 weeks. DS born VBAC.
BFP July 2009. DD born via c/section for breech presentation.
BFP Jan. 2009. Missed miscarriage at 9 weeks.D&C March 2010
December 2009 - Diagnosed with bicornuate uterus.
I could have written this word for word. I passionately loved what I did and needed my independence. The I lost my job, but we can afford for me to stay home, and I wonder what the heck I was thinking. I LOVE staying home, nothing is better than being with my LO, and going back to work and dealing with stupid people and work stress gives me anxiety. I also am not really a "kid person," but I could spend all day every day with Allie, and I do.
Also, staying home with a toddler and staying home with an infant are not the same thing. I stayed home for 6 months with Allie when she was born and it was SO hard. I was desperate to go back to work, or hand her off to my DH when he got home. I felt like I had no identity. Being home with her now is a completely different thing. We go to parks, libraries, arts and crafts, bounce places...I teach her things and read her books and have joined 3 mom's groups I am really involved with. I love the friends I've made and how we share the same interests.
It also helps that my husband and I are really involved with our dogs and dog training, so I never lost that identity. We still travel around the country doing that stuff and have all of those friends, so that's a huge part of who we are, the kids are just along for the ride.
absolutely
i am NOT cut out to be a sahm at all. i like working, i like the sense of accomplishment i get from it.
Yes I would still work. I'm a historian and honestly no one becomes a historian to make money, LOL you have to love it. That said, I'd probably work part time or write independently or go back to doing contract work or something like that if money (and benefits!!) were not an issue. My current job is for a grant funded independent research project at a university, at most it will only last 4 more years. What I do then is really up in the air right now, only time will tell.
ETA: Also what the PP said, I spent too much time and money in college and grad school to not use my degrees. LOL I'd feel horribly guilty.
I would work but not doing what I do now.
If we had the money, I would quit my current job to go back to school so that I could get a new job doing something I actually want to do. Unfortunately, while we might be able to afford me going to school pt, we can't afford me to take an entry level job in a new field even if it does mean it would lead to higher paying later on. I'm stuck due to my pay level and also my vacation time.
I'd also try to work shorter days once LO is in school, I'm already stressing about what will happen once he's in school. I really want to be home when he gets off the bus.