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I knew it was coming (baby shower)

hopefulmom81hopefulmom81 member
in TTC After a Loss

but it still makes me nauseous to think about.

 

To review, there are 3 babies that are going to be born within 2 weeks on either side of my first EDD (friend who I had a goofy tongue in cheek "pregnancy pact" with, SIL, and cousin).

Two of those babies are second babies of the same gender, so I knew there wouldn't be a shower.

Today I opened my email and got a very informal "Here are my shower dates" invite from the friend who I knew was going to start trying for her family in January like I did.

I feel completely sick to my stomach thinking of pulling up her registry and seeing all of the cute baby stuff that I should have been registering for.  I definitely will not attend and probably just have DH pick up a gift card to BRU or Target.  I knew the invite was coming, and am doing fairly "well", but for some reason the invite just hit me wrong today. 

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Re: I knew it was coming (baby shower)

  • 1220winterbride1220winterbride member
    I feel ya. I have one sitting on my desk right now. Thank goodness I have a workshop that day. ((hugs))

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  • LoveOfMikesLifeLoveOfMikesLife member
    That really sucks! I'm so sorry.
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  • jenn0021jenn0021 member

    I'm sorry about the invite. Sometimes I'm not sure if it's better knowing it's coming or being blindsided by it. I think that if you don't feel up to going, that's perfectly okay. Getting your DH to pick up a gift card is a great idea. I didn't attend one of my SIL's shower and just gave her a gift card. But I made the mistake of going to the store myself and having to see all the cutesy baby stuff.

    Hopefully the day will get better.

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  • Missa_gMissa_g member
    *hug*I hate feeling blindsided like that, even when I know in theory it's coming.
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  • Paiger886Paiger886
    I am sorry this is making your day a rough one. I hope that your day improves! ::hugs::
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  • sweepie412sweepie412
    ((big hugs)) Sorry you are having a tough morning. 
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  • BlondeBride123BlondeBride123
    (((hugs))) I've been there with a friend and my SIL who's showers were a month after my loss.  Neither one knew how to approach the situation.  They didn't want to hurt me by not inviting me, but didn't want to "rub it in" so to speak either.  There was no way I could go to 2 showers a week apart.  So I declined my friends, in hopes I'd be strong enough to handle SIL's.  This is going to be my first nephew, and I so wanted to be part of her day.  I tried.  I had seen her registry and we both had registered for a lot of the same stuff.  I knew watching her open her gifts would really get to me.  I left before she arrived, and she completely understood. Stay strong.  and here's another (((HUG)))
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  • hopefulmom81hopefulmom81 member

    imageBlondeBride123:
    (((hugs))) I've been there with a friend and my SIL who's showers were a month after my loss.  Neither one knew how to approach the situation.  They didn't want to hurt me by not inviting me, but didn't want to "rub it in" so to speak either.  There was no way I could go to 2 showers a week apart.  So I declined my friends, in hopes I'd be strong enough to handle SIL's.  This is going to be my first nephew, and I so wanted to be part of her day.  I tried.  I had seen her registry and we both had registered for a lot of the same stuff.  I knew watching her open her gifts would really get to me.  I left before she arrived, and she completely understood. Stay strong.  and here's another (((HUG)))

    Thank you for this.  I do think that is why I got a more informal email as opposed to some cutsey shower thing.  

    There is no way I can be at the shower.   

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  • sun&shinesun&shine
    .:HUGS:. I'm sorry!
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  • ktsnshnktsnshn
    Sorry you are having a tough day. Hugs.
    BFP#1 7/09 DS born 3/30/10 BFP#2 5/11 M/C 6/11 BFP#3 9/11 M/C 10/11 BFP #4 5/20/12 Pregnancy Ticker
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