Hi! I'm Tide and I have PPD.

Re: Hi! I'm Tide and I have PPD.

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  ashleyaus

  August 2011

  Hello all!!! I'm Ashley, and, well, I'm a mess!! :-) I've had depression/anxiety problems for 12 years, and after years of searching for a great do, last year I went on Paxil which CHANGED MY LIFE. Unfortunately you cannot stay on it when you're pregnant, so in October when we got our "surprise", I had to go on Zoloft. I was an anxious mess for the first 4 months, and couldn't sleep at all. I guess I just got used to it, and thankfully delivered a beautiful, full term perfect baby girl on July 8th. I was afraid of what would come after, and I was right...I ended up having to have an emergency c-section after what seemed to be PERFECT and quick as hell labor...that KILLED me...add that to a baby that WON'T latch on for anything, Type 1 Diabetes (which was a full time job to control while pregnant), FIbromyalgia and recovering from major surgery, no sleep and yes, my depression and anxiety are in FULL force with all these lovely hormones. Some days I'm so down, I don't want to even move but obviously do because I have this lovely life that we made. I HATE having to pump, and am so close to giving up. I read SO much and did so much research, I thought I would be prepared for ANYTHING, but I had no idea that this much crap would come AFTER she was born. Thank God I have the most supportive man in my life, I think I would die without him. My Zoloft got increased last week, but hasn't done jack yet. If I don't feel better in a week, I'm going back on Paxil and quitting pumping; I'm no good for anyone if I am sad, anxious, exhausted and can't take care of myself, let alone her. Any tips, please feel free to share :-)
  

  

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  tidetravel

  August 2011

  Hey Ashley, thanks for playing

  If it makes you feel any better, I had to stop BFing my twins after about 3 weeks.  They both latched on fine, but they were sleepy eaters and had a weak suck, so they weren't eating enough and were gaining weight very slowly.  I tried pumping for a few days, but I couldn't find time with trying to feed/change/burp/rock the twins.  I was so bummed; I BF DD1 for 9 months, and 3 of those months I was 500 miles away.  (wanna know how much it costs to ship 20 lbs of frozen BM?  Alotoffucking money).  Your daughter has already had a whole month on BM, which is excellent.  If you have to/want to stop BFing, it's ok.  She'll do great on formula, and it will be one less thing to stress yourself over.

  As for me, I'm a working mother of 3.  DD1 is 20 months old, and the twins are 3 months old now.  My husband is a stay at home dad of 3 kids under 2 years old - god bless him.  My PPD manifested as ambivalence towards the babies and anger at my husband.  I started Zoloft yesterday, and am so happy that I sought help.  I look forward to being able to feel better again.  (or at least to feel something other than anger.) 

  Holy Crap. We survived the first year!
  http://tidetravel.weebly.com/index.html
  
  

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  mikegirl07 member

  August 2011

  My name is Alicia. I had a beautiful baby boy that is 16 weeks old.  I was diagnosed with PPD/PPA a few weeks ago.  My symptoms first started out as physical symptoms (nausea, indigestion, pain, headaches etc) two weeks before i was due back to work.  My anxiety reached a level where i thought everything was wrong with me and i was going to be taken away from my son.  I became proactive and decided to go to the doctor where i was given a script for zoloft.  I have been on it for 3 weeks and i feel much better.  I still have some anxieties, but it is much better.  I remember being home with my son and i didnt want to take care of him.. it makes me sad that i say that because i love him so much.  Dont be afraid to get help.  THere are others like us out there. 

  

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