Am I being unreasonable?

mjkern · August 2011

Okay so I'm hormonal and crazy lol, but I think I'm somewhat justified here. I guess I need an independent opinion. It's my first pregnancy and we spent about 4 weeks being told I was probably miscarrying so I'm super paranoid about everything.

On thursday my fiance and I were both home and he cleaned the bathtub in our spare bathroom with oven cleaner(that's what he likes to use). I started smelling it and freaked out on him because I'm trying to avoid chemicals like that and I've heard oven cleaner is really bad. He didn't realize oven cleaner would be bad, we just aired out the house well and I figured everything was ok. I told him I didn't want to be around any harsh chemicals and so pretty much vinegar and baking soda was all we should clean with for now.

Well today I was out and I came home and it smelled. It's monsoon season here and we have had some spiders coming in. I had told him that he should spray when I wasn't going to be around for a few days, but I haven't been traveling lately. He doesn't remember me saying that, so I came home and he had sprayed insecticide. It says indoor/outdoor, but he had never sprayed it inside even because I didn't want it around my animals. Well today he sprayed it inside and outside. I left for the rest of the afternoon to give the house time to air out.

He thinks I'm just trying to find things to get on his case about (two things in one week) but I think these should be pretty obvious things to not be around a pregnant lady! So am I over reacting? I'm crying over every song and commercials which is not me so I don't know if I'm just being hormonal. To me it seems like this stuff is pretty serious and could do damage to the LO.

HEmery · August 2011

I think you are overreacting. This my first time also but in all honesty, cleaning has to be done. I don't feel like my house is clean unless I use some sort of bleach product.

I understand your concern about miscarrying but you have to know that if something is going to happen, it's going to happen.

I don't mean to sound harsh but you can't walk around on egg shells.

Gem17 · August 2011

I can see your point, but it may be taking him longer to "get it" with the pregnancy. Sometimes other people don't actually think of the pregnancy until they see the bump. Then, things change. Kuddos to your fianc? for being awesome and cleaning and spraying! But you do have a point about the chemicals you are smelling, especially if the house is all closed up.

AlexJ217 · August 2011

I dont think you are overreacting. I do agree that sometimes men dont think about the pregnancy until they have the visual of the bump. As soon as we see a + on a pee stick, we are instantly connected and think about our every move.

However, I would think you are fine. When our pest control guy comes to spray inside, he recommends that I take DD out for an hour. I would think what he sprays is a lot more harsh/strong than something you can buy in a store.

Good luck. H&H 9 months to you

mjkern · August 2011

Thanks for the responses! I feel like I don't know up from down on some things! I blame the hormones because I'm usually pretty laid back. And he really is wonderful, I've had a rough time with this pregnancy and he has stepped up and takes care of so much, but I agree he just hasn't "gotten it" yet:) We were talking about that today, how we know I'm pregnant but it still doesn't feel too much that way. We were trying for over a year and it still doesn't feel completely real. I'm very protective of it but still sometimes don't feel pregnant!

pinksweetpea2 · August 2011

I understand your concerns. I don't like chemicals in my home- even when I am not pregnant.

That said, you are not going to m/c from this, nor is one incident going to hurt you or the baby.

And why on earth is he using oven cleaner to clean your tub? That stuff is just nasty!

talentedmomma · August 2011

.I can't stand the smell of some chemical cleaners even when not pg, also really affects my breathing. I had to put all of the cleaners that DH would use in a box and label it "do not use when your wife is home". I am a vinegar and baking soda clearner, to my DH the harsher the smell the better it cleans. He does only use them when I am not going to be home for a few days.

Also the ovencleaner is going to remove the finish from your bathtub.

susie2242 · August 2011

Dh is super paranoid about chemicals. I've been bugging him for weeks to spray for ants, and he's never cleaned our bathroom! You've got a good hubby there!

mjkern · August 2011

pinksweetpea2:

And why on earth is he using oven cleaner to clean your tub? That stuff is just nasty!

I know! he thinks it cleans better... and honestly he has gotten my shower more sparkling then I even have! lol

mjkern · August 2011

susie2242:

Dh is super paranoid about chemicals. I've been bugging him for weeks to spray for ants, and he's never cleaned our bathroom! You've got a good hubby there!

He is good! He cleans, does laundry, even cooks but I don't touch the stuff he cooks lol. Hopefully he can put up with me till I push this LO out though, he doesn't know how to handle me when I freak out

Court1 · August 2011

We're fairly anti-chemicals around here anyway. Most cleaning is done with soap & water or vinegar, but we do use products on a few things. I think you're overreacting a little though, these incidents are going to make you lose the baby. I understand the fear though, having been through a loss I'm super sensitive about everything this time.

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