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BIL's GF has Narcolepsy - Watching LO - Advice Needed.

MrsD1MrsD1 member
in May 2011 Moms

BIL's GF has narcolepsy. I've seen her fall asleep at random times and in various places. She also has been in a car accident that was caused by her falling asleep at the wheel due to her narcolepsy (she isn't supposed to be driving without someone in the car).

BIL and his GF are here visiting and staying with us. It occurred to me that it probably isn't a good idea to let her hold Gabriella. I'm not sure if she should not hold her at all or just when someone is there, etc. 

I certainly don't want to hurt her feelings. However, I also don't want my baby to get dropped on the hardwood floor and get her head split open because she nods off. 

Any ideas on how to approach this topic? We're the same age, she has no kids and is an aspiring actor from L.A., just to give you an idea. 

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Re: BIL's GF has Narcolepsy - Watching LO - Advice Needed.

  • Lisa102304Lisa102304
    Maybe she can only hold her when she is sitting on the couch?
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  • andigurlandigurl
    Yikes, that's a tough one.  I'm a wimp and since it's your husbands brothers girlfriend I would probably ask DH to mention something to his brother and let him handle it, but be form about were your comfort level lies.  Personally I wouldn't want her handling my LO either, unless she was sitting on the couch or something.
     I worked with a guy with narcolepsy and he would just fall asleep at the most random times and places.  We'd be in meeting with clients and he would start snoring.  What a strange condition, I feel for people trying to cope with that.
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  • nickelbabinickelbabi

    We only let kids in our family hold the baby if they are sitting down on the couch with an adult around, so thats what I would let her do. If she asks to hold the baby, or you offer, just lead her to a seat and tell her it would make you more comfortable if she sat down while she holds the baby. You don't necessarily have to bring up her condition, although I'm sure she is very understanding of her limitations and would feel awful if anything happened to your baby.

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  • nycdueinmaynycdueinmay
    If she has restrictions on her driving I'm sure she understands that her condition comes with limitations, you probably aren't the first person to be worried about her dropping a baby. If I were you, I would invite your BIL to hold LO first, and ask him to sit. This would set the tone that it isn't about her, instead you want everyone to be careful. If she is handling LO in a way that makes you uncomfortable, explain that you want everyone to hold her a certain way, not just her. Make BIL follow the same rules and it should be a non-issue without hurting her feelings.
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  • LacieMILacieMI

    Do you have a casual enough relationship with her to just ask her?  If so, I could see how (in an ideal situation) this could be a really casual and easy conversation.  What if you just casually asked her what she does to protect herself/others from accidents?  If you have a friendly/joking relationship with her, could you just ask her what's the best way to make sure she doesn't fall asleep with your LO? 

    I am quite sure that just as much as you don't want her to drop your baby on the hardwood floors and crack her head open... your BIL's GF doesn't want that either. 

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  • CallidryasCallidryas member
     She may not even offer to hold baby, since she is aware of her condition.  I wouldn't say anything until she asks to hold her, then politely ask for her to have a seat and hand her the baby.  I wouldn't add drama to the situation by asking DH to talk to BIL...just say it to her face that you are concerned she may have an episode and drop baby, that you would feel more at ease with her sitting on the couch. 
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  • alliejoealliejoe member

    DH has narcolepsy, but he won't fall asleep standing up and it's not a sudden "drop into a deep sleep" kind of thing.  He's the only person I've ever met with narcolepsy- so I don't really know if people actually just go from standing and talking into a sleep like the do in the movies.  I haven't thought twice about letting him hold/care for the baby.  

    You said you've seen her fall asleep at weird times-what types of situations? is it when she's sitting?  That's when DH usually falls asleep- meetings, in class, etc. But not while talking or of if he's engaged.... just something to think about.  Depending on how she falls asleep it might not even be an issue. 

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