For those with 3 (or more)..

kcisthebombdotcom · July 2011

Tell me about life with 3.

What is the spacing in regards to age between your kids? Do you think it works or do you wish they were further apart/closer together?

I'm on the fence about whether to stop at 2 or go for 3 and need some insight.

Thanks!

spiritenergy · July 2011

Me too! I would love some insight as well. We are on the fence about 3 too.

mabma80 · July 2011

I'm pregnant with our third. DS1 will be 5 in Sept. DS2 just turned 3. And DS3 is due mid Sept.

I like the age difference (2-3years) because my first two will be in school full time soon. DS1 starts kindergarden next year and DS2 will start prek-4 at the same time. He'll go three days/wk. I think it worked out pretty good. Both boys are potty trained so that makes it easier, because DS1 helps me a lot with taking his little brother to the potty. I'm still in the bathroom with them, but he shows him what to do. : )

We've always said we'd have 3. So, this is the last one.

W&J'sMommy · July 2011

#1 and #2 are 17 months apart, 2 and 3 are 33 months apart. I love the spacing, if we go for 4 we'll try to do the 3 years apart again. My 3 year old is so helpful with the baby (may also be b/c she is a girl) and is so independent.

My babies are always easy going, fairly good sleepers, that really helps (which of course you can't know beforehand so that doesn't really help). #3 gets dragged along alot but she's very happy, adores her siblings.

kcisthebombdotcom · July 2011

W&J'sMommy:

#1 and #2 are 17 months apart, 2 and 3 are 33 months apart. I love the spacing, if we go for 4 we'll try to do the 3 years apart again. My 3 year old is so helpful with the baby (may also be b/c she is a girl) and is so independent.

My babies are always easy going, fairly good sleepers, that really helps (which of course you can't know beforehand so that doesn't really help). #3 gets dragged along alot but she's very happy, adores her siblings.

Did you hit the baby lottery 3 times and get 3 easy babies? My first 2 have been so easy, and I said to DH I'd definitely have a 3rd if I knew he/she would be like the first 2. Good to know that you can get that lucky.

luvmagoldn · July 2011

Three definitely tips the balance in a household. With the twins, DH and I were man-on-man so to speak. We both had to pull our weight and no one got to slack off in the child care department because there was too much to do from day one.

#3 was a very welcome surprise. The twins were 26 months old when he was born. I think it's good they are so close in age. We didn't have any rivalry b/c the twins were still so little. But adding one more definitely shook things up - especially in the beginning.

Now that the older boys are 4.5 and the "baby" is 2 things are much easier in some respects and harder in others. We just try to take it all in stride!

HarrietNJMommy · July 2011

1 and 2 are 18 months apart. 2 and 3 are 19 months apart. Basically 3 kids in 3 years.

The transition from 2 to 3 was the HARDEST transition for us - after 0-1 (since things are so different once you HAVE a kid). You are outnumbered. The logistics get harder. One more kid to get ready. Bigger car, bigger table at restaurants, bigger vacation rooms (standard rooms are hard with 3 kids), etc.

I use this analogy all the time: you go from "man to man" defense to "zone" defense when you go from 2 to 3 (or more) kids........it really is a whole new ballgame.

The first 2 months were easy peasy. Baby slept a lot, and was easy to tote around.........after that, it was downhill. Baby awake more, 2 other kids needing attention, EBF, etc.

I had 3 bad sleepers. They all took basically a year to STTN. I am NOT a functioning mom without good sleep. None of them took a pacifier and E and L refused all bottles. I EBF. That is tiring when they don't take a bottle.

Personality-wise, they got EASIER. DS is my easiest baby. He still, at 2.5 is the easiest personality to deal with. He is very laid-back, but at the same time stubborn! LOL!

Now, that all being said, it's so much easier now that they are older and my youngest is 2.5.

You're going to get varying answers. Age span makes a big difference. If DD#1 were 4 vs. 3 when my 3rd was born, I would probably have totally different answers, since she would have been in preschool for more days.

Also, if you have ANY help at all, it's much easier. My friends who say that they have had an easy time have help. Mothers, MIL's, nannies, au pairs, babysitters, etc.

GL!

lilone_06 · July 2011

I also hit the baby lottery with my three. I thought I got lucky with the girls being such good babies, but this little dude is even easier! Anyway, I agree with Harriett that spacing makes a big difference. I had 24m between my first two and 18 between my next, and this has been much harder in terms of the pregnancy and handling life in general. As the girls get bigger and more self-sufficient, things with them get easier while things with LO I'm sure are just heating up (soon he'll be eating solids, crawling, just generally demanding more of my attention). The other thing I think is pretty critical to have with three is an available and willing DH. While mine works long hours and does travel from time to time, he does have a little flexibility in his job so that when I'm really in a pinch, he can usually, and is happy to, help me out. As he says, we've gone from zone defense, to man to man, and now back to zone. Logistics of outings are much harder when I'm solo, and in fact I still don't feel comfortable taking them, for instance, to the zoo or museum on my own. I just don't think I could truly keep an eye on all three in a crowd, so I've ever only done this with a girlfriend ands her kids and we helped each other watch out. We do go out, but only close to home where I can keep two in the stroller or at a small playground. So I'm just giving you the real life details, but for me, three feels so right. I love our little family. And while the girls fight from time to time, they are crazy about their little brother and he adores them too. DH and I would both love just one more, but I'm reserving judgment on that one until we've settled in with three.

W&J'sMommy · July 2011

KC_13:
W&J'sMommy:

#1 and #2 are 17 months apart, 2 and 3 are 33 months apart. I love the spacing, if we go for 4 we'll try to do the 3 years apart again. My 3 year old is so helpful with the baby (may also be b/c she is a girl) and is so independent.

My babies are always easy going, fairly good sleepers, that really helps (which of course you can't know beforehand so that doesn't really help). #3 gets dragged along alot but she's very happy, adores her siblings.

Did you hit the baby lottery 3 times and get 3 easy babies? My first 2 have been so easy, and I said to DH I'd definitely have a 3rd if I knew he/she would be like the first 2. Good to know that you can get that lucky.

Lol, yes I did! My whole pregnancy I kept saying that #3 was bound to be a difficult baby, who could be so lucky? My grandma says its me, I;m so laid back and easy going and they feel that from me. Whatever it is I'm grateful!

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