Holy crap ...UPDATE!!!! Still a Vent but not as bad
So almost a month ago we were invited to stay with my BIL and SIL for exactly 2 months till my SOs job got started.....
We moved....the first 2 weeks were wonderful. Peaceful. I was walking all the time and getting a lot of things done.
Well we all know that there are certain discussions before a joining of families such as if you cook these days we cook these days....
Well I guess in their minds if they go out all weekend three weekends in a row now that I am supposed to work a 9 hour shift then come home to cook and serve them a full three course meal everyday this week.
It started last night when the SIL came to our door and said "Are you cooking tonight or not!" Of course I said "No" Since our agreed upon days to cook were Sat and Sun since I am pregnant and working and she is a SAHM. In addition I was very clear that I did not want to take part in any of their cooked meals anymore and have not done so in 2 weeks now. So I replied with a very strong - "Don't worry about us anymore with the dinner thing I would really prefer that you don't bother cooking for us since most of the time we have already taken care of ourselves - just take care of your family"
Then today - when I am not there they both attacked SO "So are you cooking tonight or what!!!"
ARE YOU F-ING KIDDING ME??????????? He is working with his brother from 8AM till 4 and Im out at work from 7:30-5 but somehow I am supposed to come home and cook something for a lazy fat inconsiderate *** that does nothing but sell foodstamps for cigarettes???????
So now from what I understand they are all pissed off at us for not saying sure we will cook.....I thought I was clear that we are no longer eating together.....maybe I have to change my language to MORON.
Oh and did I mention that they RAN OUT OF FOOD 10 DAYS AGO and we stocked the fridge for them so that their baby had food to eat??? But they give her Ramen noodles and that should suffice.....
Jesus I have no idea how SO turned out so normal and the rest of the family is a bunch of F----UPS
Re: Holy crap ...UPDATE!!!! Still a Vent but not as bad
My goodness. Sounds like saving every possible penny for a place of your own is you best bet here.
Good luck and try not to stress too much.
~TTC since 01/09~
~SA & B/W - 06/09 - Normal~
~Encouraged by OB to "just keep trying" 06/09 - 06/10 (oh, the wasted time)~
~HSG - 08/10 - Clear/Normal~
~Lapo - 01/11 - Normal~
~Clomid 50mg, Trigger shot, Prometrium - 01/11, 02/11, 03/11~
~BFN - 02/11~
~IUI #1 03/15/11~
BFP 3/28/2011
Diagnosed with GD at 28 weeks. Controlled through diet and exercise. No insulin.
Diagnosed with Cholestasis of pregnancy @ 36 weeks.
Delivered via C-section @ 36 weeks on 11/9/11.
So all in all I am over the drama in my husband's family ... Things that have annoyed the crap out of me since day one of this 8 month experiment.
1. Living with a daughter with entitlement issues who thinks that the world owes her a meal on a silver platter.... who I spent over $4000 taking care of and providing furniture, food and clothing for her and her son. But was told that "she never asked for it but she deserved it"
2. Being talked about as being a b!tch for not wanting to care for someone else's child while they are out clubbing.
3. Being told that I must have money since I am WHITE.
4. Being taken advantage of by so called family when they assume that because I live with them temporarily that I will eat crap and cook after a 9 hour day as well as tend to their wretched little beasts screams for attention when all I want to do is go take a shower....
5. Being called dirty because I skip a shower on occassion when I simply pass out from exhaustion and stress or want / need to avoid their screaming child.
6. Having family call me to tell me how bad things are for them and how they desperately need my help in finding work. When a) they receive welfare b) receive food stamps 3) have section 8 housing 4) haven't even stepped foot into a high school 5) can barely speak English and find it more pleasant to get high then to look into some form of bettering their lives.
The only thing that may be ok in my life right now in my homeless situation is that SO marched in to see his future boss and lay the law with him - We need an apartment ASAP even if it is only until the actual home promised to us comes available. We get to look at it on Tuesday......to be continued
JEEZ! I think you and SO need to move into a bubble where none of these ridiculous, demanding, free loading losers can find you. Hang in there! I don't post as much on here but I lurk every day.
More so now cause I'm on MBR but Ive continued following the BS you're going through... I also agree with PP who said you're funny and I look forward to your posts.
HUGS
Thanks ladies.
Something strange came to my attention....somehow SO forgot to tell his future boss that he is married and expecting a baby in December.......
Can we say dumb a$$???? All together now.........
So now even though we are on our way to our own place....it will be a studio for up to a year...
One big open room and a bathroom. Studios suck butt!!!! But I would still rather be in that then in my BILs home where I am asked if I am gonna cook for them all.....
I didn't read the whole post when I left my earlier comment...good to see your husband laid it out there....if the studio was offered because they didn't realize he was a family man...could he go back and say "not good enough"?
Being an urbanite living in a loft and expecting my own baby .... it's just a matter of taste. Honestly, I'm seeing advantages to it, particularly if it's short term (only the first year of the baby's life).
Is the studio is their option for an entire year, though, or until something better comes along?
How soon will your move be?
Arrangement was - SO works as his brother's assistant on all his large scale projects in his 3 buildings as our "rent" - consisting of moving furniture out of vacant apartments, painting the apartments, plumbing and all sorts of other crap.
SIL insisted on cooking for us at first - which was NOT good since they are on food stamps - not that they should be but that's another problem I have - which results in them running out of food 1/2 way through the month. Then they complaint and get all pissy about being out of food. So when I saw that she was already drilling through her last meats I went out and bought 25 lbs of chicken, 10 lbs of pork and 6 lbs of beef so that her 23 month old would have some food other than rice. But as soon as we saw that she was screwing up more, I pulled her to the side and said - please don't worry about us with the cooking - you are barely able to feed your family and I would rather you take care of them then us....we are grown ups and can take care of ourselves.
I did agree at the start that we would cook on weekends ONLY. I work 9 hr shifts M-F - she is a SAHM that does NOTHING. She was fine with that....until she started spending all her weekend time eating out and wasting cash on outings with her family - meaning that we would be sitting there with no way of cooking for them... we have only been there for 3 1/2 weeks so in 3 1/2 weeks we cooked for them 1 time due to their outings and disappearances. However, since I saw that she left her husband home alone while she went shopping or some such crap I bought his chinese food and got her and her baby something as well one other day.
Then out of nowhere she starts banging on our door on a Monday - Tuesday and now Wednesday (even though she was having a dinner party on Wednesday) asking if I would cook. When I answer no - it was not a day I agreed to - she pouts - and stomps off down the hall like a child.
So if our rent is paid by my SO killing himself in a high rise apartment building in NYC that is like a revolving door and I am agreeable to cooking on weekends - how is it that she feels as though this is proper??? Did I mention that the only room we have to stay in until next week sometime is a dusty workshop office with 2 sofas that we are sleeping on opposite sides of the room surrounded by tools, buckets of paint and cleaning supplies? It's not like they gave us a real room or anything.....We even have to use the bathroom they provide for the businesses that are on the lower basement level during the day..
This was only supposed to be for a month or month and a half so I have been trying like he!! to be patient.