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Stay at Home Moms
nekorayne
member
>
Can we discuss child banning?
nekorayne
member
Yahoo has this article up:
https://shine.yahoo.com/channel/parenting/the-no-kids-allowed-movement-is-spreading-2516110
What do you think?
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Personally I would not mind it for really nice restaurants. We have one I want to go to that I would never take Raz: table cloths, pretty live classical music, etc...I would rather it be a date place. Like I would never take him to the down town jazz bar, it seems common since to not take him to the romantic restaurant! Places like this could for sure be adult only and I would be fine. Maybe I would even like it...
Movie theatres having adult only times at night is also not bad. Maybe after 8 even. I can see this. I also like that they could balance it with special showings for parents and kids in the day, I have heard of these. I'm not much into the theater, but I'm sure some moms are.
We don't eat at many chains and we often take him to quirky local places that may not be for kids, but they are casual and all love seeing him so they are obviously family friendly, but also singles or date friendly all at the same time. Our sushi and vegan places don't have kid menus, but they have highchairs and always come over to say hi to him. I don't think you can only take kids to McDonalds or Chilis...I think it is good to have some nicer and healthier options for family's. I went to these places pre DS, and can go with him now. He is very social and well behaved and when he does cry I always take him outside, I think the majority of places should stay open for everyone. I noticed some of the comments seemed to feel that all public places that are not FOR KIDS should ban them, I disagree. I think it is good to expose my son to different places. These are the places that I learned tolerance for others and kids are apart the world. Then again I think it is ok to ask guests to be polite and remove disruptive kids if it continues to long in certain places.
As for grocery stores, if they feel they have to I hope child free time would be later. I mean we grocery shop as a family and I really love that time, and I know lots of moms who could not shop without kids. It seems the grocery store should be a family friendly place! I think if people start banning kids from places like this it would be a bit much and then how would they grow up knowing how to act in public?
>This discussion has been closed.
Re: Can we discuss child banning?
Ahhh...the beauty of living in a free Country...
Resturants and certain movie theaters/ at particuar times I totally get...but grocery stores?
I guess this raises a bigger question for me..Do we ( as a country ) really do that bad of a job of raising kids that they can't behave in public? I am personally determied to raise a very respectful and obedient child. It is how I was raised. I hate rude children with rude parents who let their unruly kids run wild but I see that old trend of letting kids run wild stopping. I don't know what has contributed to it but I love seeing moms and dads disaplining their kids in public again and I have started seeing fewer children being rude and disrespectful, loud or annoying.
I think all the people who are chosing not to have kids need to understand that our babies are the ones who will eventually become doctors, teachers and lawyers and that they are not an annoyance. They are the ones who will be running the world when we are dead and gone. What are we telling our children if we ban them from places? I think we are telling them that they don't matter and that isn't the case. As corny as it sounds....children are our future. If we want our culture and way of life to go on we have to expose them to the culture, resturants, stores ect...
You basically said what I was trying to say....but better
I think that kids shouldn't be at "nice" restaurants. But I do feel that it should be up to the parents. IMO I wouldn't take DD to a restaurant that didn't have a kids menu anyway so that would eliminate many "nicer" places.
I hate when I hear anybody (any age) talking during a movie. Heck, let's ban the teenagers then, they are WAY more obnoxious. It's really annoying. IMHO, kids younger than 6 should be in bed during the evening movies anyway-so why are they watching an 8pm movie?? I always thought about the cost of sitters and maybe parents can't afford one but still want to go out. BUT they are still having to pay the kids (ages 2-12) $10 ticket to watch the evening movie so why not give that $10 to the sitter and go watch your movie in peace? (I realize that the sitter's fee would be ~$10/hour with the movie being ~2 hours then figure in travel/parking and it would be more of a ~3 hour date costing you $30 vs. the $10 ticket-but if it's late night then the kid should be in bed!)
Grocery store bans? Seriously? WTF? How are single parents supposed to shop? What about SAHM with multiples? Grocery stores are for everyone so this should definitely not be kid banned. I personally don't take DD shopping with me anymore since it's too distracting. She was never "out of control" but it's just easier for me to shop in the evening when she's in bed and DH is home or on the weekend during nap. I get there, shop and leave very quickly.
This is all very sad to me since it seems like banning kids is just the tip of a huge discriminatory problem waiting to happen.
Thanks for before...and YES! to this...we take DS to educational things all the time..Art museum, historical stuff ect...now thats where I might get really mad. How could I raise a child who wants to learn if I don't try to teach him at a young age and it is much more fun to learn in person then just from a book.
Thanks for before...and YES! to this...we take DS to educational things all the time..Art museum, historical stuff ect...now thats where I might get really mad. How could I raise a child who wants to learn if I don't try to teach him at a young age and it is much more fun to learn in person then just from a book.
Thanks for before...and YES! to this...we take DS to educational things all the time..Art museum, historical stuff ect...now thats where I might get really mad. How could I raise a child who wants to learn if I don't try to teach him at a young age and it is much more fun to learn in person then just from a book.
LMAO! funny, but I agree
I've never personally been so bothered by a kid in a store or a restaurant, or a plane, that I wished children weren't allowed at all. Even back in the days before I wanted to have my own kids, I never thought kids should be banned, period, from a venue.
If I was having a fancy meal or was at a movie theater, I would speak to the usher/maitre'd if the parents didn't do something about a screaming kid. In more casual settings, if I see a parent dragging a screaming kid through Target, I judge the adult for pushing the kids past their limits and then I get over it. It's nothing to get all in a twist about. Just say something to the parent if you're so inconvenienced. I think an outright ban is dumb.
I think parents in general need to exercise discretion in when and where they take their kids. I've taken my kids to nice restaurants since they were born (and our favorite neighborhood one doesn't have a high chair, but is very definitely kid friendly). We also go to museums, historical sites, etc. But, if they start acting up I take them outside and let them get their energy out without disturbing other patrons. This past weekend my ILs did their annual "adult birthday celebration" and it entailed taking 4 children between the ages of 2 and 5.5 to a restaurant. In between courses and while waiting we took the kids out to the courtyard and let them play and they sat happily and quietly in their chairs for the meal. When we left the waiter and owner approached us about how well behaved they were and asking us to please bring them back any time.
As far as grocery stores are concerned, if I only shopped when I could go without my kids we'd starve to death first. DH is in graduate school and works incredibly long hours (12-14+ hour days) and only takes a day "off" (including weekends) if we have somewhere to be. Occasionally I've had a kid tantruming through the store, usually because I won't give them a treat. My opinion is that they have to learn that grocery shopping is part of life and if I leave because they act up they'll expect that and act up every time we go.
I would be okay with nicer restaurants setting limits (i.e. no kids under 6 and children only at lunch time and not during dinner or Saturday dinner) provided they were clear as you walked in the door or called for reservations.I do think, though, that the only way children learn how to behave in a place is to go there. We have strict rules at home about eating dinner together (often just me and the kids, but the rules remain the same) and they know not to act up at a restaurant. By the same token I respect their limits and if it's going to be a long meal including appetizers and desserts I will find a way to entertain them out of their seats (without having them walk around inside the restaurant or disturb other diners) in between because a several course, several hour meal is asking far too much of a 2 year old.
The only way kids learn to behave in the grocery store - is by GOING to the grocery store... The only way kids learn to behave in a restaurant is by GOING to a restaurant.
Experience is the best teacher. If parents hold their kids accountable and teach them age appropriate behavior chances are there's no issue taking them into a store. That said, it's a free country, and if a store wants to "ban kids", then that's their choice as a business just as it is their choice to put up a sign that says "English only spoken in this establishment"..
I actually commented on the article yesterday on Yahoo because that Whole Foods is one I frequent and we go to play group at a children's store right next to it on Fridays and usually have lunch at the Whole Foods afterwards. The author of the article completely misrepresented them and the Whole Foods has been notified by many patrons. They provide care and crafts for kids during this time so parents can shop without their kids. They also have story time at this location that is great.
As for not taking your kids or them being banned from restaurants, I think it should be up to parents to watch their children and if they are acting up and they can't get the behavior under control they should remove the children from that situation for the comfort of those around them. My husband and I take DS everywhere and we are very conscious of his behavior. Luckily he is a very good boy and doesn't cause a stir. We recently took him to an outdoor Shakespeare production. We put our blanket on the outskirts of the crowd so he wouldn't disturb the other people and so we could make a quick exit if needed. He was a dream and played on the blanket and eventually fell asleep.
Anyway as other's said if you don't take children out in public how are they supposed to learn proper behavior?
I don't know how I feel about this. I can understand how people feel when an unhappy child is having a tantrum at a restaurant that is known for being upscale and quiet. I think it's rude for the parents of that child to allowing the child to keep having a tantrum.
With regard to the article, I do support the movie theater ban on children, but only at the specific movie theater mentioned (don't know if you followed the link.)
The Alamo Drafthouse has a gimmick. They serve restaurant food and alcohol at their movie showings. Most of their films start late afternoon or evening and the entire atmosphere is not conducive to children. I have taken both of my children to their Baby Days (it's free for kids and in the summer they have a whole free kids movie series). I love this place! I am perfectly content for them to continue their kid free policy.