Baby Showers

Holy crap!!!

 

Ballsox's poem rocks my azz off!

 

imageBallSox:

Yes, I do expect you to go without sex as long as you can't financially support a baby.  Why?  Because porn and sex toys are a hell of a lot cheaper than supporting a baby.  My BF's h was unemployed for 2 years as well and even though they were both dx with INFERTILITY ISSUES they had already had one miracle baby and didn't want another one until he had a job and they were more stable.

Other things you can can cut to help pay bills that do not affect the safety of your child.  1) Internet and cable 2)eating out 3)name-brand products 4)a second car 5)any professional services (mani/pedi's, hair stylists/salons, etc).

You say you don't need one, but then when someone questions you, you backpedal and say "well, we're saving up for a pack 'n play".  Yeah, guess what---you can register for it and someone can buy it for you instead of having to hand over cash so you can go buy one.

Anyone who REALLY knows you and your situation (Which is just who you're inviting to this shower, right?  I mean, you're only inviting your nearest and dearest and not everyone in the city to your money tree fundraiser) will probably get you the necessities.

But where are my manners, you asked for a poem---let me see if I can whip one out for you....

Times are hard, the economy's rough,

But holding out on peen was really mighty tough

So I gave in regularly without a care

But I was on the pill, :stomp: it's just not fair!

What 1%, It won't be me

Then what on my soaking hpt did I see?

A second pink line---oh ***---what the hell?

In my uterus a baby does dwell!

So now it's your duty to pass by the store

I don't want your dresses, your shoes, your blankets and more

You and your 'sposies can go in the trash

What I'm asking for is your cold, hard-earned cash

Your singles, your fivers, your tens and what's more

Your twenties would be perfect just dumped on my floor!

So raid your pockets, your piggies, your bank account too

Cause nothing but cold dirty money will do.

I know it seems tacky, it might not sit right

But I'll give you my sob story if you'll give me all night

If you can't make it to my shower, it's fine

I'll send you my paypal info, you can donate online!

Before I go, I have one more simple request

Because I love my baby, I know what is best

Skip by the cards, I don't want them as well

If you'd buy me a book, I'd think that'd be swell. 

 

Re: Holy crap!!!

  • I didn't take the time to read that entire thread, but assuming someone asked about having a money tree and including a poem about it on the invite, and this was the response, I love it.

    Yes

    image
    Baby Boy born sleeping at 20 weeks.
  • GASP! I too LOVE!

    I remember reading that original post a few days ago and being outraged at the immaturity and the "it's not my fault" in it. Pregnancy is 100% preventable...period! Pills and condoms have been known to fail. If pregnancy was an "oops" I feel for you. If it was me I'd be using BOTH condoms and pills to be twice as responsible...but obviously that didn't hit this poor girl. "Oops" or not the cherry on top was asking for money! If I couldn't support my baby I'd be elated to have ANYTHING people were willing to gift. Selfish, immature, and (from her responding posts) stubborn....

    The poem is really really fabulous though! It states it perfectly. Good luck to that baby....

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  • AWESOME.

    Totally agree with the abstinence.  I did not have sex until I was married and we had a year long engagement.  We were not ready to play those odds.  There are plenty of ways to be safely intimate and enjoy each other without baby making risks.

    My close friends who (at least waited until they were married) still had two unplanned pregnancies while using condoms and the pill!  It happens.  They were dirt poor, still in school.  Yet, they never asked for money or hosted their own shower. They had a BBQ celebration with invites that said "no gift please" -- and guess what, we all brought a gift anyway because they were a classy couple and we knew they needed all the help they could get.

    Married 5-24-2008;
    BFP 4-19-11. Ezri Ana born on due date, Dec 30 2011!
    My Ovulation Chart 
    BFP 10-05-2014; MMC 11-15-2014.
    BFP 02-17-2015
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • I'm glad you liked it.  I think I'm going to have to save that one for posterity.  
    Image and video hosting by TinyPic Little Man (4 years old---holy cow)
    He's the single greatest thing I've done in my life and reminds me daily of how fun (and funny) life can be.  He's turned out pretty swell for having such a heartless and evil mother.  
  • imageBallSox:
    I'm glad you liked it.  I think I'm going to have to save that one for posterity.  

    YesYesYes

    imageimage
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Wow you have a great gift for poetry. As for the tackiness, well we will leave it there. I have 5  kids and never planned a single one. Both my DH and I know what happens when you hop in the sack together. Doesn't matter what you use unless it is the word "NO" you can get pregnant.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker image.
  • To go along with the fabulous poem, a good quote, from Michael Jackson's
    "You wanna be startin something"...

    If you can't feed a baby

    yeah, yeah,

    then don't have a baby

    yeah, yeah!

     

    Daisypath Happy Birthday tickersDaisypath Happy Birthday tickersPitaPata Cat tickers

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