she broke my heart...

SCasey32 · July 2011

So DH is gone for 5 weeks doing training for his upcoming deployment....
Our oldest daughter is almost 21 months old and a super Daddy's girl, and ALWAYS has a difficult time when he leaves.
This morning she woke up at 1:30 crying hysterically...
so I went in her room to cuddle her and soothe her, when I got there I found her clinging to her "daddy" bear (it has a picture of DH on the front of it's chest) saying "Daddy love you." as she sobbed.

I don't even know what I'm going to do when he deploys,
It kills me to see her like that.

iluvmytxrgr · July 2011

My kids have had rough days durring this deployment. When they do, I hold them in my lap and talk about Daddy. We read "the Daddy book", a recordable book he did for them. We look at pictures of him. They each have one of his shirts that they snuggle with at night or when they miss him. We also say a prayer for Daddy every night.

We also have what we call the Daddy Wall. It is a big open wall in my dinning room. They color pictures for him or bring home artwork from church and put it on the wall for him to see when he gets home. My older kids bring home papers or tests from school that they are proud of and post them on the wall.

I also let them pick things to send to him in care packages. They have a blast with it and they think they are helping Daddy. They also put drawings in each box.

I hope some of these ideas help make things easier. You are going to have tough days. You just have to find ways to help her feel better about them. GL!

mamastich · July 2011

Uhg I just realized I get to look forward to this, its hard enough for me when he leaves and now its all about her... its never fun for anyone

shall923 · July 2011

I am sorry. My DD is so young we didn't think it would be a big deal for her but she just recently started crying when DH leaves for work. She is a daddy's girl for sure. He starts work-ups for deployment soon and it is going to be so hard on her.

Poor kids. It breaks my heart.

SCasey32 · July 2011

iluvmytxrgr:

My kids have had rough days durring this deployment. When they do, I hold them in my lap and talk about Daddy. We read "the Daddy book", a recordable book he did for them. We look at pictures of him. They each have one of his shirts that they snuggle with at night or when they miss him. We also say a prayer for Daddy every night.

We also have what we call the Daddy Wall. It is a big open wall in my dinning room. They color pictures for him or bring home artwork from church and put it on the wall for him to see when he gets home. My older kids bring home papers or tests from school that they are proud of and post them on the wall.

I also let them pick things to send to him in care packages. They have a blast with it and they think they are helping Daddy. They also put drawings in each box.

I hope some of these ideas help make things easier. You are going to have tough days. You just have to find ways to help her feel better about them. GL!

This is wonderful!!!!
It'll be the first time he'll be deploying since she's been out of the belly, and now he has to leave not only one baby girl but two. We're trying to find ways to make it easier on all of us.
Thank you for sharing.

GL to us all...
being apart is hard on everyone.

sweetface83 · July 2011

MH is gone for 3 weeks of training and it's the first time SD has to deal with it where she actually knows what's going on. We have a "Tell Daddy Box". Whatever she wants to tell her daddy, she writes it down and puts it in the box. The teacher in me also likes that it's giving her practice with writing sentences over the summer. lol. She's 6 btw but maybe you can write it down for your DD and then let her scribble on it.

mrsrp2sw · July 2011

well for my DD first deployment when she was 18months-2 1/2 years we did the following:

We potty trained (keeping her focused on doing something to show daddy when he gets home...lets be a big girl for daddy)

I got a sippy cup that you could put a picture in or have the child color themselves and filled it with pics of daddy...

She was a little to young to understand where daddy was but this deployment when she was 3-4 we did the following:

A paper chain for ever day he would be gone (take one down each day he is gone)

I made her a Daddy t-shirt out of one of his shirts (ironed on a pic of daddy onto it to wear to bed)

I ordered her a Daddy Doll from Daddydolls.com (same people as hug a hero--you can request a free on from having a chaplain request one for you)

I also made a daddy doll using iron ons while I was waiting for the one to come in the mail

Hope this works we also have a teddy bear from build a bear with a recording device in it so she can hear daddys voice all the time....

sweetpea2003 · July 2011

If you can, take lots of video between now and when he deploys. My 2 year old DD LOOOVES to watch videos of her daddy. She laughs and laughs. She also loves the recordable book he did for her. It is the "dadda book" and we read it at least 2x per day.

My daughter is also a "daddy's girl". The good news is, under the age of 4 most kids have almost no concept of time. So while they miss their daddy while they are away, they aren't counting down the days and feeling exhausted from how long it has been. When your husband gets home, it will be like he never left (or like he has only been gone a day).

I'm not trying to downplay how heartbreaking it is, just that your DD will do much better than you expect at her age. It is the older kids that usually have more trouble.

shinece · July 2011

My DH is deploying in December so we purchased a video camera and when we put ds to sleep at night we have short recording sessions. I record DH reading a different story every night followed by prayers, then he ends the recording by saying "ok son it's time for bed." DH walks over and pulls the covers back and says hop in. We also record their special times together that our son can watch when he just miss daddy. We also have video tapes just with Daddy on it reading and singing and these tapes we are giving to the lady who keeps our son while I'm at work so he can see Daddy twice a day. We plan to celebrate Christmas and Thanksgiving early and video tape that as well. I know it's not the same as the real thing but hopefully it helps. Oh yeah and we made 2012 clendar with a different pic. each month of DS and I for Daddy to take with him and count down the days until he returns home.

SCasey32 · July 2011

I am actually really glad that the concept of time really hasn't hit...
because I'm definitely NOT looking forward to those days.

These are all great suggestions thank you.

she broke my heart...

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