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JKM416
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Need help with the saga of naming #3
JKM416
member
Just as with our first and second kids, DH and I each have our favorite names and just can't bring the other around. Backstory: we don't name them until we see them, and with DD I looked at her and admitted that my preference didn't "fit," so I agreed to go with DH's pick (four years later I'm still glad I did). DS's name is more of a compromise, though I would have rather switched his first and middle. Upon laying eyes on him, I thought "Yeah, it could work" because neither of the other two choices I'd insisted on considering seemed to suit him at all. DH likes it a lot, and ultimately I'm fine with it...just don't feel like it was the perfect choice like DD's turned out to be.
I'm feeling stubborn about #3 because I feel I've done the majority of compromising. Problem is, DH is just as stubborn and told me that my first choice for a boy gives him "heartache." Um...dramatic? It's not as if he attaches some trauma to it; apparently he just doesn't like it. I feel like this one is a boy, so I sort of want to make the deal of "if It's a boy, I get to name it, and if it's a girl, you do." Except I don't love his first choice for a girl, either. I remind him that all three kids have his last name, so shouldn't I get a little more input into their first and middle names? He doesn't buy that argument 
So there's no "winning" here...one of us is going to have to bend more than the other no matter what. I set up a poll that includes each of our first choices, as well as ones the other feels "ehh" about - or has completely vetoed. I'm secretly hoping that if my name preferences get the most votes, he might start to warm to them if popular opinion indicates they're quality choices. I would at least like them to not be flat-out dismissed. His first choice for a boy is a hesitant "maybe" for me, so if it turns out everyone thinks it's fabulous, then I could potentially be swayed. Girl names = similar problem but not quite as extreme...it'll be easier to compromise.
So...long story NOT short, please vote via the link in my signature if you're so inclined and see something you like. And if you have any words of wisdom or have been locked in the same battle, please share.
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Re: Need help with the saga of naming #3
Voted!
Hope the poll works out in your favor!
As an objective third party, I think all of your name choices are great! They're good, classic names.
Two of my favorite boy names are on your list (Christopher and William). Are those your choices or your husband's?
Voted - I wish though I could've chosen more than 1. I liked a lot of the names there. I don't think there was a bad name among them and your child will be well named with any of the options. My fingers are crossed for you.
PS Re. changing mind on names. My daughter is named after my grandmother. My grandma spelled her name Mollie but I preferred Molly. When Molly was 4 months old I started having serious doubts and regrets about spelling it differently, I just kept on picturing her now that I knew her as an "ie" kind of girl and that the "y" was all wrong. After a few months it passed and I realized I am just happy with her no matter her name. I think once you fall in love with the child and get used to the name, it will sound sweeter than you ever thought it could.
They're all good names.
You have several of my favorite boy names and a couple of my favorite girl names on your lists.
I understand about changing your mind on names. I love LO's first name (and lobbied DH very hard for it during the pregnancy - he finally agreed right around the time I went on bedrest, lol). The middle name we kept going back and forth on and I'm still not sure we made the right choice. It's a little trendier than I thought I would pick, but then again I really like it and it has a couple of meanings for us. But in reality how many people will ever know LO's middle name?
this. and i don't see how such classic names could give anyone heartache! it's not like you want to name your daughter "Lardweanor" or your son "Hermes" (yup, two real names i've come across in recent weeks).
and i'm also curious about your preferences and which you each don't like!
ditto PP, great names!!!
we also had it narrowed down to 2 names for boy and 2 for girl and chose once we met DS (we were team green). Good strategy!!!
I voted and I liked them all. One of your boy names is my top boy name. Before we got married, I made a deal with DH that if I took his last name, then I got first choice on our boy's name and that he would be named my maiden name. But we haven't had a boy yet so it's a moot point.
Anyway, I think all of the names are really nice and I hope you two will be able to come to an agreement.
Thanks, all. You're helping with my boy choice
True that our kid won't be scarred for life by any of them...we stick with normal / traditional / slightly boring picks. So we're on the same page with style but then dig in our heels about personal preferences. There are plenty more I wanted to put on the poll, but it limits to you to six per question. I would like something a bit more creative for a girl, but apparently things like Maura, Leah, and Eva are just tooooo crazy for DH. Our last name is a three-syllable Irish name starting with M, FYI.
I, too, stared at Lardweanor and saw "Lard-wiener." Oh my...no words. There should be someone at the Social Security office tasked with flagging such names and having a mandatory consultation with the parents before issuing a card if they still insist upon it.
Since it was asked, here's the breakdown:
William: Me = like it but not in love, DH = same
Ian: Me = first choice, DH = "heartache"
Thomas: Me = lukewarm, DH = first choice
Christopher: Me = not into it (feel like it's an '80s name), DH = likes it
Aaron: Me = really like it, DH = does not like
Andrew: Me = refuse to use it (it's DH's middle name and none of our other kids are directly named for someone, and DH won't agree to calling him "Drew"), DH = loves it (for obvious reasons)
Elizabeth: Me = like it but it doesn't excite me, DH = really likes it
Cecelia: Me = first choice, DH = could possibly be influenced but not likely
Shannon: Me = like it, DH = does not like
Caroline: Me = love it (was my pick for DD), DH = lukewarm
Bridget: Me = meh (not sure how well it will age), DH = really likes it
Catherine: Me = it's fine but am concerned it's too common (and might become popular because of the new Duchess?), DH = first choice
This was my first thought when I saw that name on your list. As a teacher, you can tell who/what was popular when. A few years ago, we had Chelsea's and they were all born during the Clinton era...
OMG, i WISH i was making that up! and the most outrageous thing, i had to call this person for work. i asked for Mr. Last Name. and she says "don't you mean Ms.?" duh, as if i'm supposed to know that is a woman's name!? b/c doesn't Lardweanor just scream WOMAN!?!? wtf? LOL!
i asked her how to pronounce it. it's Lard-WEE-ner. of course.
to the OP, those are also my first choices! Aaron and Cecelia! if we have a 3rd boy (in my fantasy life, where we have 5 children), we'll call him Aaron Michael. Aaron is a family name. Cecelia i have loved since Beaches!
We're pretty Irish as well and Maura is my mom's name. FWIW, she never liked it. Even growing up in an Irish neighborhood in NYC folks had no idea how to pronounce it or misspelled and mispronounced it as Moira. I actually like it and would use Maureen to name a little girl after my mom if we have three girls (girl number 2's name is already picked out if we are so blessed).
I voted for Cecilia!
By the way, have you considered which names sound good with your other children's names? It probably makes no sense to anyone but me - but when we named #2 and #3 I leaned towards names that sounded good with the siblings' names. That was not the deciding factor by any stretch, but I did think about it. To me my three kids' names sort of "hang together" well.
Thanks for the input. While I like it, "Maura" isn't one I'm willing to take a stand on...I'll save that for others I feel more strongly about. I actually prefer "Mara," but it's only one letter off from DH's name, and he doesn't like that idea. I proposed Maura because it was close, but he still says no
Actually, that's a factor and why I'm willing to let go of a few options that are a little more "out there" (in DH's opinion). I also want them all to sound like they "belong together." DD's name has three syllables and DS's has two. I think both are in the Top 30 of the recent Social Security list, so maybe I should consult that to see where #3's options rank and not stray too far from that.
DD1 9.24.06
DS 7.1.08
twins due 9.7.11 lost twin A at
DD2 4.7.12
Same thing happened with both our kids: born with lots of dark hair, now they're fair-skinned and blonde. My friend recently admitted name regret...she had one girl name in mind if the baby was fair (like her) and another if it was olive-skinned (like her husband). Her DD came out looking totally classic Italian, so that decided it. Now, 18 months later, the girl has light blond curls and blue eyes (only one in the family who does). And my friend doesn't feel like her name fits now. So luckily I just got a "vibe" with DD, because if I'd named her based purely on looks, I'd have gotten it so wrong!
ETA: DD and DS look very similar (and both take after me), so I'm assuming that #3 will follow suit. So, right or wrong, I'm picturing a mini-DD or mini-DS and seeing what name would "match."
I voted Andrew and Caroline, but honestly they are all great choices. GL!
And kudos to the DC board being sooo nice and diplomatic! I stalk the Baby Names Board occasionally and it can be fairly snarky sometimes!
My cousin had 2 with blonde hair and blue eyes like her husband and the third one looks just like her - darker complexion, brown hair and brown eyes. C doesn't look quite like she belongs with her sisters but at least my cousin has some genes to claim now
You never know what could come next!
DD1 9.24.06
DS 7.1.08
twins due 9.7.11 lost twin A at
DD2 4.7.12
My third child looks nothing like DH or me. I get a lot of "did you get friendly with the mailman or something?" comments. Because that's SO HILARIOUS.
Now you all have me scared. If this one is a boy, then it's fine if he looks like DH. If it's a girl...I'll just say that I'm not sure how aesthetically pleasing DH's features in feminine form would be. I will have to teach her to pluck her eyebrows before the first day of kindergarten.
I know you've probably been told this a million times... but, don't count on kids not being called a nickname. I swore my kid wouldn't be, but, wouldn't you know it - the nickname I dislike is what she's called at daycare (and even by some members of my family). The NN kind of fits her, but, I still don't care for it much as a name!
I like her NN on DH's side of the family, and think it fits her well. But, through school and beyond, I'm sure the more traditional nickname will probably stick.
LOL, my name is one of those. So crazy. Ridiculous even!
I voted for Thomas because it is my favorite as a stand-alone, no-nickname option. I like William too, but I think many people would opt to call him Will right away and to me, Tom or Tommy doesn't naturally come into my mind when I meet a Thomas.
I voted for Caroline...a beautiful, classic name.
When I dream of future kiddos, I do this. I write all the names out, with our names, see how they look all the ways they can be written. And now you know how much of a nerd I am...
Anyway, I voted for "William" and "Catherine". Haha, the Duke and Duchess! "William" I like because it's my grandfather's name and I like the meaning. "Catherine" (or "Cate" specifically) I just have always liked, also good meaning (well, one of the later Christian meanings anyway). I for one, do like the names more now because of the Duke and Duchess. For me, name meaning is very important. I struggle with the name for our next child if it's a boy because I worry the name meaning isn't all the much...it's based more off of Welsh folklore. (BehindtheName.com is my resource)
Also, if you don't want name derivatives to be used, "Ian" or "Aaron" would be your best bets for boy names. Maybe that will help swing your husband back into your court. All the other names are bound to have people butchering the name - it's inevitable.