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July 2011 Moms
HelloAnnie!
member
nonclicky poll for those with outside babies: easier/harder?
HelloAnnie!
member
I just read a friend's blog post where she listed all the things about motherhood that have been easier than she thought they'd be and all the things that have been harder. As one of the gals still waiting for LO to make her big debut, I'd love to know what the July Mommas with outside babies think about this.
1. What has been easier than you expected?
2. What has been harder?
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected?
DD Born July 2011
TTC#2 for 4 years: multiple rounds of IVF, M/Cs, lots of tears. Cautiously optimistic about #2 EDD 12/29/18
This discussion has been closed.
Re: nonclicky poll for those with outside babies: easier/harder?
I will answer for my DD#1 since DD #2 still has a bit longer before shes an outside baby
Easier: for me- L&D. I was fortunate to have a quick, textbook delivery and I hope to be so lucky again
Harder: Breastfeeding. It was so hard in the beginning and i had to use a shield and it was a pain and I had mastisis ... but it got better and we BF for 15 months.
Also Harder: transitioning from being career 'gal to part time WAHM but mostly SAHM.
As expected: I didnt lose all the baby weight before TTC #2 and i think i kinda knew that would happen! Heres hoping to do better this time around!!
1. Nursing. It was a huge mess with DS and I ended up EPing. DD's latch is great and she's nursing like a champ.
2. DS is not taking this life change very well. Hes sweet to DD but acts like a monster when I have to feed/change/whatever DD. Sigh.
3. The routine. Sleep deprivation, meals, bath...all the same.
1. What has been easier than you expected? My baby boy has been so wonderful. He's got a fairly relaxed personality and usually only fusses when he starts getting hungry. He's been really good at breastfeeding (better than me--he seemed like he knew what he was doing from the beginning). He was pretty chilled out when I was carrying him, so I guess that could have been a hint.
2. What has been harder? Getting things done around the house. I delivered 4 weeks early and was hospitalized for pre-e 12 days before that and i can't seem to catch up.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected? I knew that I would have trouble operating on less sleep. I've always been a good sleeper and someone who needs a good eight hours to function; I am definitely desiring a solid, restful sleep at this point.
1. What has been easier than you expected? Nothing really.
2. What has been harder? The sleep deprivation, the guilt that I have for him not staying in longer, not being able to BF (which I a now okay with, but was hugely upsetting in the beginning), having patience (H is the most patient person on the planet though, thank god), the dogs feeling upset by his crying, the stress of being home all day with him alone (and the sadness of not being with him when I go back to work), having so much less time with my H. Basically everything.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected? Nothing. Not.one.thing.
That said, he is totally worth it.
We'll miss you sweet Debbie Girl (4.21.12) and sweet Cindy Girl (8.9.12)
1. What has been easier than you expected? <b>Losing the weight. I gained 27lbs and within 2 weeks was down 23 of them... now a month later I am actually 1 or 2lbs less than when I started
And the crazy amount of love that just over takes you... I knew that I loved him while I was pregnant... but it's crazy how much love have for this tiny little person!</b>
2. What has been harder? Breastfeeding... it freaking hurts and making it out of the house in a timely fashion... it just does not happen.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected? Nothing really. As a FTM I didn't have a lot of expectations, except I should have expected that he'd be delivered at 37 weeks via c-section since both my DH and I were.
FTM fresh off of delivery on Saturday (first few hours home):
1. What has been easier than you expected? Med-free labor was NOT easier than I expected but the labor progressed quicker than I anticipated.
2. What has been harder? Breastfeeding. Period. Latch of LO is not good, she's tearing up my nipples. We're all crying because of it even DH. We're going to try to get a lactation consultant at the house tomorrow.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected? As a FTM, it is all new to me so as lame as it is I would say that I knew we could never be truly prepared.
Birth story coming soon... needed to get this off my tired mind.
1. Easier- knowing what to do, as weird as that may sound. I feel like my mothering instincts kicked in and I am not as nervous as I thought I'd be. Even when my mom and sister were here, I felt like I knew best how o care for her despite me being a FTM and them being experienced. Oh and she's an easy baby and only cries when hungry.
2. Harder- breastfeeding. We've finally pretty much got it, but she couldn't latch for about 10 days and i cried a lot of tears. DH and I syringe fed to try to avoid nipple confusion and I became very intimate with my pump. Also I never have time for myself amd often forget to eat, fo to the bathroom, etc.
3. Wasn't sure what to expect but I knew DH would be a wonderful dad and that's been as expected. I fall in love with him even more when I see him with DD.
1. What has been easier than you expected?
Labor (because I didn't have any? Ha!)
2. What has been harder?
Feeding. BFing is super hard, exclusive pumping is a pain in the ass, and feeding her via bottle is also a PITA because she has reflux and it not a fan of food. I never thought getting her to eat would require so much time and effort.
Also, DD will cry is she's not being held (while being held, she's a perfect doll). I thought I'd be able to put her down in a crib/PNP/RNP/bassinet/ANYTHING to go to the bathroom or get a bite to eat or pump or really do anything.
The recovery from the c section was much harder than I thought it would be.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected?
For the most part, everything else.
BFP #3 via cancelled IUI ~ C (2lb 3oz; HELLP) 5/16/11
BFP #4 via the natural (free!) way ~ E (8lb 11oz) 9/13/12
I'll answer these for my first LO:
1. Breastfeeding. Fortunately, it went really well for us.
2. Getting through the first few weeks on very little sleep.
3. Bonding with her. I remember after about a week making a comment that she was only a week old and already I couldn't imagine my life without her.
1. What has been easier than you expected? weight loss. I gained a whopping 57lbs, but have lost over 30 so far (baby was born 7/1).
2. What has been harder? Breastfeeding - my nipples hurt like crazy for the first week, but now they are getting better. I feel like I am ALWAYS nursing and I can't do anything because he is always on the boob. (but I will not stop!). Healing after the vaginal birth - I had 3 tears and felt like crap for about 10 days.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected? waking up in the middle of the night to feed LO, I knew that was going to happen.
1. What has been easier than you expected? Healing from my c-section. This c-section was a breeze to heal from. My first one was awful and it took way longer than normal to heal. The weight has been easier to lose this time also. I gained 25lbs, have lost 20 of it 4 weeks pp.
2. What has been harder? Getting sleep. DS#1 is 13 months old, and he sleeps on the opposite schedule of DS#2. Tried moving them around, but it's not working:(
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected? I had no expectations, bc I didn't know what to expect. DS#1 was born at 36 weeks, and was IUGR, so he was 4lbs 5oz, and had other issues. He spent 2 weeks in the NICU, and he was on special formula and meds when he came home. DS#2 came at 37 w 6d, and was 7lbs 3oz. Perfectly healthy and went home when we did at 4 days pp. New experience for us!
I almost feel bad answering this, because everything has been easier than I expected! I expected the sleep deprivation to be as bad as it was with my boys. And I expected it to be much more hectic with three kids.
So far she is sleeping great, and things have been pretty calm.
2. What has been harder?
Nothing really. I expected it to me much more chaotic than it is.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected?
1. Easier- At the hospital, I was a lil nervous about knowing how to soothe/care for LO once she was home... Turns out that with help from What to Expect in the 1st Year and great teamwork from DH, we kinda appeared like we had done this before
It feels 'right' now!
2. Harder- Breastfeeding! After trying like a mad woman, lots of tears on my and LO's part and LO losing a bit too much weight... I made the decision to Exclusively Pump. It was a very emotional decision that at first I was not comfortable with, but in the long run, it has made us all A LOT happier! Its a little tiring having to pump every 3 hours, but LO is now gaining like a champ/actually happy to feed and Daddy loves feeding her! Thankfully, so far I haven't had any problems keeping up my supply (its more than doubled in a weeks time
)
3. Gone exactly as Expected- Not much, haha! I guess I thought I had it all figured out... But DH and I have just had to work together and roll day by day
She even makes us happier than we could have ever expected
1. What has been easier than you expected? Breastfeeding--I really wanted to do it and have a lot of support from family and friends. Baby is doing great and gaining weight---I couldn't be happier!
2. What has been harder? Coming to the realization that yes, I HAVE to have a c-section. The recovery is getting better every day, but it's hard to imagine what my body went thru and wondering if my body will ever get back to normal.
3. And, because I'm curious, what has gone exactly as you expected? I don't think anything went as expected!