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Attachment Parenting
KBabySmiles
member
Advice needed: Solids/Weaning(ish) frustration.
KBabySmiles
member
Hey Ladies!
I don't post a ton and ten to be more of a lurker but you guys are always super helpful so I thought I would try asking you guys for help and see if you guys have any ideas for me.
My
son is 13 months and still not super crazy about solids. I normally
wouldn't have much issue with that, except for the fact that I can tell
that he's hungry and not totally satisfied by nursing anymore. He's been
gaining weight fine and was in the 50% at his one year I don't think
he has made the connection between eating solids and hunger yet, but I
don't really know how to help him learn that. He gets SO frustrated when
we try to feed him solids. Sometimes he eats more than others, but
mostly he just grabs a few bites here and there. I am just concerned that he is not getting what he needs. His iron
levels have been low at his last two appointments and he is on iron
supplements twice a day now. So I guess my first question is: Is there anything I can do to help him learn the connection between hunger and solids, or is it something he will grow out of?
I have always nursed on demand, and it feels like lately he is on the boob all.day.long. I hear people talk about how their child nurses 3-6 times a day, and I just shake my head because he nurses that many times before noon. haha. I am really starting to feel touched out. I do not want to wean him totally, but would LOVE to get him down to a more reasonable number of nursing sessions a day. Obviously this is coupled with the aforementioned solids issue. I don't feel comfortable denying him when I know that he is hungry. I guess it's a catch 22. I have tried don't offer don't refuse, that didn't work. I tried to redirect him when he asked to a snack, cup of water, or milk...all failed. Recently I have been denying him the first few times he asks and trying to redirect and even with that I feel like he is just nursing all day. I enjoy our nursing relationship for the most part, I just wish it wasn't a constant thing. I have no issues nursing him every few hours and throughout the night...I guess I'm just kind of at a loss of what to do. I feel like our nursing relationship is holding him back from exploring solids, but I don't want to totally wean him.
I often feel like I can't participate in family times in the evenings because any time he sees me all he wants to do is nurse. When he's with DH he plays and interacts, and I feel badly being around because DS just wants to nurse and DH looses out on play time. I find myself getting frustrated with him more than I should when he signs to nurse for the 10th time in 15 minutes. I feel like all he wants me for is my lactating super powers. I am just feeling worn out and super emotional. I am just at a loss for what to do.
Sorry that was so long. Thank you so much for reading all that and responding if you have any ideas for me!
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Re: Advice needed: Solids/Weaning(ish) frustration.
My situation is pretty similar. DS is almost 15 months and still not terribly interested in solids and nurses frequently, only he nurses more at night and not quite as often during the day right now.
I don't really have much advice since we haven't resolved anything ourselves, but I will say that DS went through a phase right around 13 months (so just a few weeks ago) where he wanted to nurse nonstop during the day and he has cut back on his own. He still nurses a lot for his age, but it's not every time he looks at me now. Another mama at my La Leche League said her LO went through a similar phase around that age as well. I think maybe it is part of their development where they are figuring out that they can ask for/ demand things and get them. Nursing is something they enjoy so they ask for it over and over.
Other than that I find that DS is less likely to ask to nurse if we are out of the house, so I try to keep him busy. I also avoid letting him see me topless or in just a nursing tank and I avoid sitting in our usual nursing places. DS also eats more solids if he is distracted, so I have been bringing food for him and going to a restaurant or coffee shop. Today he really enjoyed using a blunt fork to spear canteloupe (well, I speared them while he held on) and he actually ate quite a bit of it, so I'm going to try to give him more things he can eat with a fork.
My DS was still pretty much EBF at a year, so we were late jumping on the solids bandwagon. I'd consider him fairly picky, and I think he is especially wary of strange textures. He's made progress in the last 6 weeks though - so much so that I'm down from leaving 24 oz of milk for him when I got to work to leaving about 8 oz. And most nights he only gets up once to nurse, and sometimes sleeps 9 or 10 hours straight. Here's what's worked for us:
-Foods he can feed himself w/ his hands or a spoon, like banana bread, mashed potatoes, oatmeal, raisins/craisins, cereals, etc. He's very independant and usually won't let us feed him, so we play a game where he holds a spoon and I put food on the other spoon then switch with him. Or let him hold 2 spoons in his hands and feed him with a third.
-Letting him take his time...he might spend anywhere from 30 mins to an hour on a meal - he'll eat a bunch, then take a break, then slowly keep eating for awhile.
-Letting him "graze" throughout the day - while he's toddling around, hand him a piece of toast w/ hummus or crackers w/ hummus, bread w/ sunflower butter, cereal, things like that.
-Give him plenty of opportunity to drink water and juice - we've found that pooping is more difficult for him since he's been eating so much more food, so getting enough water (preferably earlier in the day) is key.
-Trying all kinds of foods, even those we wouldn't expect him to like. The kid LOVES lemon slices and frozen blueberries, hates spaghetti.
Our pedi also suggested letting him sit on my lap at mealtime and pick off my plate, because they find the food more interesting if they think it's yours, not theirs.
We haven't had much luck getting him to eat veggies, but I puree them and slip them into other things, like banana bread (cauliflower and butternut squash puree) and mac and cheese (cauliflower and white beans). I have the book Deceptively Delicious, which I find pretty helpful for that kind of thing.
Good luck!