Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Is It An Age Thing?
I don't think it's an age thing.. more of a "how you were raised" thing.
My parents never instilled in me the idea that it was polite to send Thank Yous. I think I sent them for my HS graduation gifts, but not for birthday gifts, Christmas gifts, etc. I try to be better now that I'm an adult, and we'll definitely make sure Charles is a Thank You kind of guy.
Heck, I'd be happy now if my family (or DH's too) actually told me if they received something I sent them.. let alone thank me for it.
My answer is somewhere in between. Usually no for birthdays unless the gift giver isn't present to say thank you to. Same for any other gift giving situation, thank you notes for those not present. My only exception is someone who isn't as close (ie., MIL friends). Our families came to this arrangement though about the no thank you cards, but you must say thank you.
Except baby showers and weddings, because unlike birthdays, those events usually expect gifts, and favors don't count as thank you's at all. And I don't think it's an age thing, thank you's in person or via notes was something I was taught as a kid. Some of the posters on the month boards (and some others) either are young or act young, or act spoiled and entitled. Or ettiquette simply wasn't taught in their household and have no idea why they need to say thank you, even if the hand knit sweater in neon colors is not their style.
I like some of the ladies on the other boards, but a few spoil it for anyone else wanting to stay drama free (thank yous included!!)
all of this.
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I send Thank you's for birthday gifts but not holidays (i.e Christmas). I've been to several parties recently with DD/DS that we haven't received a TY.
My mom ingrained it into my head that you should always send a thank-you note, so I'm very good about notes. But I also think it depends on the circumstances. Exchanging gifts with immediate family? No notes....but SIL/partner and MIL send us notes. That was fine when DH and I were dating...we were all trying to show our manners! HA! But now that DH and I are married, it's too formal to me. We all thanked each other in person when the gifts were opened. That's enough.
Anyone who sends a gift for any occasion gets a thank-you note. I want to acknowledge receipt of their gift and am also of the mind that if they took the time to buy & send a gift, then I can take the time to write them a thank-you note. DS will have this ingrained in his head.
This actually became a *hot* topic in my family when my mom stopped sending birthday gifts to my cousin's kids because she never received a thank-you note but continued sending gifts to my other cousin's kids because they always sent notes (or their mom did on their behalf when they were too young). My aunt got all in a huff because cousin/his wife "weren't good about stuff like that" and it "wasn't the kids' fault." Well, guess what? There's no Gift Fairy, so either acknowledge the sender or you're not getting any more gifts.
I would send thank you notes for a first birthday party. But once DS starts going to a zillion kid parties, I'm not sure what the protocol is there. I don't think notes are expected.
When MH & I started dating, I sent thank you cards to his parents for birthday and holiday gifts--I just felt like I should, you know? Then my MIL told me it wasn't necessary to send a thank you, me thanking them when I saw them was plenty.