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Young Parents.

CgelskeCgelske member
in Parenting
I've been feeling down about my age, I'm not even all that young, but I am kind of young and Dh is even younger, so we are young parents. I feel like people don't take me seriously all the time, and I personally don't feel like an adult or a woman sometimes because of this. I take my job as a parent very seriously and I do my best every day to be the best parent I can be. So when someone doesn't take me as a parent seriously, it's really upsetting. I also have lots of insecurities about things like not having a home to call my own, not having a good job that provides health insurance, and not having an education that would help me get a good job. Dh and I would both like to go to college, we would like to one day own our own business, and just to add to my insecurities, within the last month both of our vehicles died without any warning, so we've been depending on other people to get us to work. The last 4 months we have been living with Dh's mom trying to save up money for a house when of course the car problems come along, and I am dying to get out and have our own place again. This has all been bringing me down, when we were on our own I felt so much better. I felt like I was an adult and now I feel like a child. I guess I just needed to complain. Have a good friday everyone. 
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Re: Young Parents.

  • belle204belle204 member
    Now I'm curious ... how old are you? At any rate, it sounds like you're doing the best you can given your circumstances. Just try to map out a plan to get yourself back on track with your financial, car and housing situation and keep taking care of your child. Things happen no matter how "young" or "old" we are. My daughter and I lived with my mid-to-late 20s (I'm 31) and bought a house and moved out two years ago. It took a while and it made me feel like crap at time but it's what I had to do at the time. Life happens. GL with things.
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  • jettagurljettagurl member

    I'm sorry it's so rough right now.  Regardless of age, I think we all go thru hard times and sometimes feel against a wall.  I wasn't necessarily a young parent, but at 31 now, I still have moments where I feel inadequate compared to the older moms at DS's school, or wherever....and I still have moments of not believing I'm old enough to have 4 kids, or to be out of college for almost 10 yrs already.  It's all normal, is what I'm saying. 

    I agree with pp in that saving to buy a house may not be a realistic goal right now.  Renting is a great option when you don't have the savings to back up the maintenance/repair parts of home ownership.  I think you would be smart to rent while going to school - just for the decrease in stress while trying to get your degree.  

    Also, when looking for vehicles, you don't need the newest, shiniest thing available.  You can get a decent Honda or Toyota for $1-2000.  I'd use what you have saved to go that route - get something that is reliable and fits your little family, but not a payment. I drive a Honda van that is 8 yrs old.  I've had it since we found out we were having twins and I likely wouldn't be working.  When I go back to work, we'll buy a nicer, newer one, but it's not necessary now.  

    Do your best to really cut corners on your spending - coupons, clearance racks, etc.  But do make time to do something for yourself every once in a while, and make time to reconnect with your H.  The stress of life can get heavy fast.  

    GL!   

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  • always4278always4278 member
    I can really relate to what you are feeling.  I'm 21 and my BF is 23.  I also really care about being a parent and work very hard at it.  We are really struggling financially right now as well and it is so frustrating.  However I have been accepted in to the Nursing program at my university and will be finishing the last two years of my bachelor's degree starting in the fall.  Sometimes knowing that it isn't going to be like this forever is the only thing that keeps me going.  I recommend starting school as soon as possible so that you have something to count on for the future.  There is financial aid available and once you or your DH are enrolled you can check about student housing because it is usually reasonably priced.  Definitely not fancy but better than nothing.  Also find out about income adjusted apartments in your area.  That is what we live in and we have a nice two bedroom two bath that we pay a way reduced rate for.  The waiting can be a little longer for them but its worth it imo.  Also like a pp said try to find an old honda or Toyota because they are good quality and not very expensive used.  I have a 1996 Camry and it still gets close to 30 miles to the gallon which also helps reduce your gas bill.  I hope everything comes together for you! GL!
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