Cant stand SO right now. (VENT)

brandx725 · July 2011

To start things off I have been angry at SO for the past couple days and I am one of those people that you will definately know when I am mad at you because I wont hide it. Well I have been trying to let it roll off me and figure out a way to tell him nicely why I am mad. Well tonight just really set it off when we were going to bed and we got into a little argument because he turned the light off on me while I am sitting there trying to nurse DS. He walks away and says "I seriously can take your attitude I cant do this *** anymore"

Well here is why I am pissed. SO comes home from work every day and plays video games. LITTERALLY every day. He does this from about 4:30 till 6:30 then its time for dinner. He eats dinner comes back down stairs and plays game. About every third or fourth day I can get him to do something else like go to the mall or run errands with me or watch a movie together. While he does this I read to DS or do tummy time or give him a bath among many other things. Does SO other involve himself OF COURSE NOT.

Next when I went to pick out DS pedi he said I dont care you pick it doesnt matter to me. Wtf this is your son too why would it not matter. I tell him this and he says I trust your opinion well guess what I want your opinion too. He has done the same thing when I have been look for daycare for LO when I go back to school full time in Sept. Now LO has to go see a GI doctor for his blood in his stool that the doctor thinks is him being allergic to my breast milk and when I ask SO if he wants to come he says and I qoute "If your asking if I want to miss a day at work to go then no." I swear I could have smacked him when he said this.

Finally to top it all off he has gotten up twice to take care of DS at night. Yes you read that right TWICE. Once I wouldnt even count because LO was so fussy so I changed him, fed him, swaddled, cuddled him and tryed the swing and nothing worked so SO stayed up till he fell asleep and that was maybe an extra hour. I realize that with me wanting to mostly nurse and not use bottles so I can build a freezer stash that SO cant do much, but geez cant he at least change a diaper and bring LO to me to nurse so I dont have to get out of bed every single time.

When I expressed this to SO other he basically said nothing. Then when I explained to him that I want him to help me pick out DS daycare he said I really dont want to do that on my day off, you sit there on the computer all day with him sucking on your boob you could have this *** done in one day. Wtf thats not the point I am trying to make a-hole. He doesnt realize how good he has it. See if I wake his ass up for work in the morning maybe that will make him realize.

Sorry so long, vent over. Just really really needed to get that off my chest. Oh and sorry if there were any spelling mistakes or run-ons I am just so incredibly angry.

redshe · July 2011

Sorry your having a crappy time with your SO (mine was like that during my pregnancy but because I had a c-section he had no choice but to help me)

SarahAndBen09 · July 2011

I posted last night with a vent about my DH who doesn't help me at night either, so I sympathize with you there! It was like pulling teeth to get my DH to care about pediatricians and day care choices, too. I basically did all the research and chose both. I guess some guys just don't care about that stuff (or are too lazy to do the research so they accept whatever you decide). You aren't alone!

kaitylin · July 2011

My DH doesn't help at night either. I finally told him he had to do Saturday nights all by himself (he can't use work as an excuse) and since he's had to do that, I think he's appreciating it more. He still doesn't get up at night but he will babysit so I can run errands. That wouldn't work for you though if you don't want to use pumped bottles. DH plays videogames after work everyday too (so annoying!) and honestly I didn't even ask him about the pediatrician because he just really doesn't care and that to me wasn't worth a fight. Can you talk to you DH and work out a schedule for what days maybe he has night diaper duty? If you agree on a time when you are awake it avoids middle of the night fights and it's easy to just lay in bed when you are exhausted if you know someone else will do it but if you already know it's your responsibility to take night shift it's easier to get up and do it I think. DH is so much more appreciative since he had to take 1 night a week and do everything and he sees how exhausting it is.

hsal · July 2011

I'm so sorry but it's also so nice to know its not just me! My hubby is ADDICTED to his video games and beacuse he's currently unemployed, I dont even get tha break.. he is ALWAYS on. 3 days ago I snapped. I took LO into bed to nurse her there because she had been fusisng for almost 45 minutes, fighting off sleep. the wind caught the bedroom door and it slammed shut. He stormed in telling to not slam the door and "if you want help, just ask". I broke down in tears and screamed at him, telling him that I felt second to his video games and I felt like I was taking care of LO on my own. He cried and apologized; it ended up just being that hubby felt helpless since he couldnt feed her but in the past few days he's truely stepped up and helped more often with rocking, soothing and diaper changing and has been catering to me more... asking if I want a drink or a snack. It gets better... I promise!

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